Ted 2012 Subtitles

Amazon Instant Video

Available in HD
(978) IMDb 7/10
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Mark Wahlberg stars as John, a man whose Christmas wish as a child was that his teddy bear, Ted, would come to life and be his best friend forever. Amazingly, John's wish comes true - but unfortunately Ted turns out to be a swearing, pot-smoking delinquent who reduces John's life to rubble.

Starring:
Giovanni Ribisi,Mark Wahlberg
Runtime:
1 hour, 45 minutes

Available to watch on supported devices.

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Product Details

Genres Comedy
Director Seth MacFarlane
Starring Giovanni Ribisi, Mark Wahlberg
Supporting actors Mila Kunis, Joel McHale
Studio NBC Universal
BBFC rating Suitable for 15 years and over
Captions and subtitles English Details
Purchase rights Stream instantly and download to 2 locations Details
Format Amazon Instant Video (streaming online video and digital download)

Customer Reviews

4.0 out of 5 stars

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

By Mr. Adam C. Allen on 26 Dec. 2012
Format: DVD Verified Purchase
It's not a family guy episode. It just isn't - don't be put off by the people who claim it is.

What it is however, is 106 minutes of laughs with a smattering of suspense (no, really), and it's rounded off nicely with a heartwarming ending. All of that sounds a biit "meh", but when it's funny it's really funny - Ted going for a job interview at the supermarket had me almost hyperventilating with laughter. And there are some real near-to-the-knuckle comic moments.

Patrick Stewart expertly narrates the opening scenes with excellent comic precision.

If you're a big FG fan, you'll recognise that some of the crew are from FG:
Walter Murphy does the music as he does on Family Guy.
Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild had a hand in the screenplay.

Also from FG:
Lois (Alex Borstein) young John's mum
Joe Swanson (Partrick Warburton) John's work friend, easily recognisible by his voice
And in Ted, Lori is played by Mila Kunis who is Meg in Family Guy.

Other cameos from memory include Flash Gordon (Sam J. Jones), Ryan Reynolds, and Norah Jones and Tom Skerritt.
And a special mention must go to Giovanni Ribisi who is an excellent actor, he plays "weirdos" so well.

For me, this was the second best film of 2012 (Avengers if you're wondering), and is well worthy of a place in your DVD collection.

I've knocked a star off because it sagged for 10 minutes or so, don't let that put you off though.
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Format: DVD
This is not a film I would normally watch. I was railroaded into it by my wife on a flight over the weekend. She had started watching it and subsequently persuaded me to interrupt my viewing of another film to watch this. My expectations were low. I'll conclude at the beginning - its brilliant. Looking at the other reviews this is a bit of a Marmite movie. Plenty of one starers to accompany the fortunate majority of five starers. You need to be able to see beyond the superficiality of a talking, swearing bear to appreciate this film. Not everyone will be able to do this. Bad luck guys - you are missing out. I found the comedy fresh and witty. OK, so its rather rude, but thats kinda where its roots are. I've never seen a teddy bear smoking a bong surrounded by hookers. Thats fresh for sure! The wit comes from the way Ted is portrayed - as a down and out human like character trying to cling on to his role as a teddy bear - a little boy's friend who has now grown up. Wahlberg, on the other hand, is a grown man trying to relinquish his role as a teddy bear's custodian. He does it brilliantly too. There is plenty of comedy friction to be had from this unusual situation. I loved the way the story progressed. Deep within it all there are some touching messages to be found. Depending on which side of the Marmite fence you sit this might be easy or hard. But most definitely worth a try
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87 of 105 people found the following review helpful By Jon on 12 Sept. 2012
Format: DVD
Ted is hilarious, rude and crude (possibly the word you will see in every review of this movie). The film is cast with comedy gold, with a smattering of Family Guy voice actors thrown in for good measure, and the one-liners smack you in the face right from the beginning. The hilarious narration (provided by Patrick Stewart) supplies a healthy handful of these. The mention of the Apache helicopter was still making me laugh when the film had ended.
What can sometimes be the best thing about a comedy is when it is set in a world that is actually believable - obviously with a living and breathing teddy bear involved this comment might seem slightly strange. However, everything else is plausible, and the animated bear is really well integrated into this world as a second rate "celebrity". From here, the laughs continue to flow.
Some people have described this as an hour-and-a-half long episode of Family Guy, and although the humour is broadly the same, believe it or not, there is much more substance to this movie, with sex, romance, danger, drugs and language used in ways that a twenty-minute episode of Family Guy could only dream of.
As John (Mark Wahlberg) and Lori (Mila Kunis) try to create some kind of life together, Ted's shenanigans (possibly an understatement as these shenanigans often involve parties, drugs and prostitutes) continue to come between them. To John, he is just having fun with his longtime friend. To Lori, John is being influenced more and more by these "shenanigans".
I saw one review describe Ted as "wildy unoriginal", however I'm not sure if you can get more original with a storyline that involves a walking, talking, drug-addled teddy bear. So often, comedies are hit and miss, or run out of steam towards the end.
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10 of 12 people found the following review helpful By The Movie Guy TOP 500 REVIEWER on 26 Jun. 2013
Format: DVD
There is nothing like a foul mouthed teddy bear to make for a great movie. Personally I think Zach Galifianakis would have made a better Ted, but then again he has played the dysfunctional buddy role before. As a child John (Mark Wahlberg) wishes for and gets a talking teddy bear. Now that they are in their 30's neither one has grown out of their immaturity with Ted becoming an increasing problem.

John's girlfriend Lori (Mila Kunis) demands that either Ted leaves or she goes. The humor is what one would expect from watching "Family Guy" with a lot of adult language. It spoofs other films and is critical of many aspects of society. It is politically incorrect. Like "Family Guy" some of the bits work and some don't. If you don't find one bit funny wait a minute and a new one comes along.

Excessive f-bombs, sex, heavy drug use, no nudity.
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