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Surviving an Affair, rev. ed. Hardcover – 1 Jul 2013


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Product details

  • Hardcover: 224 pages
  • Publisher: Revell; Revised edition (1 July 2013)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0800719549
  • ISBN-13: 978-0800719548
  • Product Dimensions: 15.2 x 1.4 x 22.9 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 3.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (8 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 424,751 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Product Description

About the Author

Dr. Willard F. Harley, Jr. is a nationally acclaimed clinical psychologist, a marriage counselor, and the bestselling author of numerous books, including His Needs, Her Needs; Five Steps to Romantic Love; Love Busters; and Draw Close. Harley's most-loved book, His Needs, Her Needs, is also now available as a video curriculum for churches and small groups. His popular website, www.marriagebuilders.com, offers practical solutions to almost any marital problem. Dr. Jennifer Harley Chalmers is a licensed psychologist and marriage counselor.

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Customer Reviews

3.6 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

19 of 19 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on 30 Oct. 1998
Format: Hardcover
Surviving an Affair is the description of a trip from how a seemingly 'OK' marriage can deteriorate to a full-blown affair, and it provides a detailed roadmap of how to survive the affair and eventually recover, hopefully with the renewal of the marriage. This book encompasses the behavioral approaches that Dr. Harley and Dr. Chalmers have successfully used to save marriages, and applies them directly to the affair. The elements that are covered in some of Dr. Harley's other works ('Give and Take' and 'Love Busters') are included here. This book presents a balanced viewpoint of the betrayer's view as well as the betrayed (and even presents the view of the other man/woman).
If you're in an affair, either as the betrayed spouse or the betrayer; I strongly recommend this book. It explains the atmosphere that leads up to an affair, and it vividly illustrates how an affair SHOULD end. Most affairs don't end this way; instead, they linger on with the spouse having the affair unable to make a decision. All the while, the betrayed spouse and the children suffer tremendously. But there is hope. This book gives a great deal of insight in to the mechanics of the affair, and it describes how the 'betrayed' can hang on through the worse experience of their life to eventually come to a point where reconciliation is possible.
The recovery process outlined in this book is also very detailed. Some of it seems 'silly' or trivial at times, but it is important and it really can work (I'm in a marriage that is proof of that).
An affair is Hell. This is a roadmap to get back from Hell.
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33 of 34 people found the following review helpful By "molie4444" on 28 Nov. 2002
Format: Hardcover
My husband of 15 years told me of a 64 day relationship which concluded with the intention of leaving me and my 4 children. As he now realizes himself that it was all a 'big mistake' I am left with the task of accepting his mistake and moving on. I have read many self-help books on this subject and feel that although there is no obvious answer to this problem, the more view points one has the more chance one stands of coming to terms with what is probably one of the most sole destroying thing I will ever have to face. Therefore, I would strongly suggest this book to anybody who is trying to love again...........
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17 of 18 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on 24 Mar. 1999
Format: Hardcover
I recently believed that my spouse was having an affair. I came across this book at the library, and when I got in to reading it, knew that an affair was in progress. As I got further into the book, I learned what love is all about, why affairs occur, and understood that I was as much to blame for the affair as my spouse. I also had alot of hope that if I could get my spouse to understand the book, that our marriage could be saved and made much stronger then it had ever been. The concepts in the book also helped me to understand most relationships I had in my life and where conflicts with relationships come from. For me the key to understanding this is that people are simply different. People are not wrong or right, they are just different. Once I understood this, I also understood some of the concepts discussed in other books I have read like "The Road Less Traveled", "The Bible", "The Seven Habits of Highly Succesful People", etc. I think the book has helped my spouse and I to remain married and go on with what I hope will be a wonderful life together or apart.
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19 of 20 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on 2 Jun. 1999
Format: Hardcover
From the 18-page Personal History Questionnaire to the sample good-bye letter, Dr. Harley again demonstrates his expertise in the area of helping couples. This is a step-by-step guide about how to recover as a couple and by yourself. I'm happy to say that my wife and I are in love again...and not by chance.
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