And so begins one of the most lame and downright inexplicable series of sequels in cinematic history. While the original Children of the Corn was at least watchable, this first sequel is just stupid - there, I said it. I could have said lame or amateurish or torturously boring, but I think stupid really is the best word for it. As a huge Stephen King fan, I think it is important to forthrightly disavow this and a number of other pathetic movie sequels that exploit his name; King had nothing to do with the putrid storyline of this horrible film.
Eight years after the release of Children of the Corn, we finally find out what happened to the children of Gatlin. What is their punishment for murdering all of the adults in that town, including their parents? Prison? A loony bin? Juvenile hall? Try none of the above. With Isaac dead, the authorities absolve the other children of any guilt whatsoever - and so all the rest of the murderous kids are shipped down the road to Hemingford to be welcomed into the homes of the townsfolk there. Yeah, that makes sense. All these schmucks apparently trust these bloodthirsty kids implicitly because they do nothing to stop them from wandering around town in spooky groups by day or roaming the corn fields by night as they seek guidance from He Who Walks Behind the Rows. Yes, this great god of blood and corn is still so incredibly lame that he doesn't even have a proper name. That's not all. Not content to simply torture viewers with the stupid storyline of the kids, the filmmakers also throw in an annoying tabloid reporter, his hateful and alienated son, and the revelation of a clichéd money-making conspiracy.
I don't know what is more thrilling - watching this alienated father and son trade barbs or watching the herd of wholly non-photogenic kids chanting more of their mumbo jumbo. Ryan Bollman does put a lot of effort into his role of Micah, the new leader of the corn-obsessed children, but I'm afraid he couldn't scare a hungry crow away from one of his beloved corn stalks. He lacks any presence or charisma whatsoever. All in all, Children of the Corn 2 is an exercise in cinematic futility, plagued by bad acting, a poorly written story, laughable special effects, and an almost complete lack of suspense.