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I'd Sooner Starve! (The story of a hapless restaurant owner)

I'd Sooner Starve! (The story of a hapless restaurant owner) [Kindle Edition]

Mark Sinclair
4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (113 customer reviews)

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Product Description

Product Description


Have you ever eaten in a restaurant? Have you ever wondered why the waiter was surly? Why the salad was limp? The Soup cold? Ever thought the owners looked like they didn’t know what they were doing? Ever thought you could do better ... ever wanted to quit your job...?

‘I’d Sooner Starve’ is the amazing true story of one man's quest to escape his monotonous nine-to-five existence and open a charming delicatessen and restaurant in a delightful market town.

With honesty, humour and breathtaking naïveté, it records his steep learning curve, radical lifestyle change and the immediate revelation that the customer is not always right!

Amidst tales of bulimia, public menstruation, endless abuse and hilarious customer encounters, this eye-opening story unveils what happens after you walk into the boss and say: “I quit!”

‘I’d Sooner Starve’ is a shockingly comical tale of culinary highs, customer lows and one woman's unhealthy fixation with thigh-warmed Stilton…

‘An absolute hoot!’ ~ Anonymous celebrity chef

‘This hits the nail on the head so much I can't believe it! So much so, I can't possibly put my name to it!’~ UK chef

‘I am delighted that Mark has written this book. Maybe now people will believe me when I tell them the stories!’ ~ Matt, co-owner

I'd Sooner Starve - the book the celebrity chefs were too afraid to endorse!

From the Publisher

A hilarious true story about one man's dream to run a quaint little deli in a quiet market town.

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 411 KB
  • Print Length: 190 pages
  • Publisher: Wild Wolf Publishing (9 Nov 2011)
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B0065I0SBW
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (113 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #112,922 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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More About the Author

Mark's first play, Just Another Park Bench, debuted with two performances - one matinee and one evening. It was 30 minutes long and featured a rather cumbersome curtain call between scenes.
Mark was so unhappy with the first performance that he wrote another 20 minutes-worth of material for the evening show and created an entirely new character. His 'actors' weren't happy.
He was nine.
On stage that day, Mark studied what worked and what didn't, then set about adapting things in response. What could be funnier? What could be cut? He stared at the words, trying to work out how he could get more from each one. He was fascinated by each of them; their order, their influence and their importance. It's a fascination that remains to this day. In truth, he can sometimes be clumsy with words, ignorant of their rules and even irresponsible with them, but he never lacks appreciation of their impact.

So... 30-odd years after that play was performed, Mark's debut novel, I'd Sooner Starve! (Wild Wolf Publishing) was published. Following its success, he set about making words entertain once again. His second book, The Beard is the result.

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
17 of 18 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Why you shouldn't follow your dreams 8 Jan 2012
Format:Kindle Edition
A geniune laugh out loud account of one man's desire to follow his dream and open a deli. This is a very enjoyable account of the pitfalls of running your own business. With stories you couldn't make up, this is a book you will read in one sitting. It really is 'a page turner' and a book in which you will be chuckling to yourself. It ranges from Tom Sharpe type farce to moments of extreme poignancy and contradicts the view that you should always follow your dreams and that the customer is always right.
I throughly recommend it and lets just hope the author takes up a new career so he can write a book about it
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I,d Sooner Starve. 19 Feb 2013
Format:Kindle Edition
i am rating this book 5 stars as it is so well written, funny and very true.Having served the public myself for many years i can relate to this. Well done.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I laughed til coffee came out my nose 19 Feb 2013
By missc
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I havent actually finished it yet, I'm only about a third of the way through it, but I had to review as so far I have laughed out loud several times including in public places (most notably a coffee shop and every one turned to look at me). Its not easy to amuse me that much, so I have given the book 5 stars purely on that basis.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Enjoyable 15 Oct 2012
By Atir
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Why is it that some people believe if a person stands behind a counter that the latter has limited intelligence? Some episodes quoted are, in hindsight, outrageously funny but utterly believable. - Congratulations to the author for having put up with this sort of "entertainment" for four years. And, thank you for sharing it with Joe public.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A welcome detour from the genre I usually read! 13 Oct 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Being a hard core horror fan, it was with some trepidation that I deviated away from my comfortable genre to read something totally different. I chose to read this book as I have found that Wild Wolf publishing, for some strange reason, seems to put out books that take me away from horror ( sometimes) and I have enjoyed everything I have read by them, so I knew that this book would be quality and well produced. I won't go into too much detail...the synopsis does this. To summarise, it tells the tale of the author and his partner following their dream to open a delicatessen in a village where the locals are, to put it bluntly, completely mad. I was howling with laughter at the debacle that was the author's life on a daily basis. The descriptive talent of the author is brilliant. I felt as though I was actually in the delicatessen as I was reading the book. And the sense of humour was wonderful. The author writes in such a dry way that I defy anyone reading it not to laugh out loud. This book is so great BECAUSE of the humour. As I said, I would usually steer well clear if I saw a book about someone's business venture, but I am so glad I read this book. It is gorgeously edited, and professionally polished. I am hoping that the author has embarked upon another business venture as I would love to read more about his life. I am amazed that the author didn't murder any of his customers...again, not going to spoil the story, but the characters in this book are so outrageous. If you are looking for a feel good, laugh a minute book from an author with a wicked sense of humour, then you need to give this book a read. Am hoping that Mark Sinclair will give us more glimpses into his life soon.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Horrors from the restuarant trade 17 April 2012
By Kew
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
This is a witty piece of writing chronicling how a couple started up their own delicatessen and restuarant with no previous experience at all. Some of the antics had me laughing but some of the tales of the customers that they had to deal with were horrific. Having worked with the public myself in the past I can confirm that there are some nasty customers out there! There was also some bitterness to the writing, understandably.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars so funny 11 May 2013
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Really funny book. Well written and a great insight into the behaviour or customers. I felt sorry for the writer and the staff as things got more and more complicated. I recommend reading it :-)
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Laugh out loud funny 5 April 2013
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
A well written look at English life, if it's not enough to put you off your food, it is certainly enough to make you think twice about opening your all business. A good giggle.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Catering confessions
Having worked in the industry for far to many years this book was so spot on! I identified with each and every situation that the writer found himself in. Read more
Published 1 day ago by julia woollins
4.0 out of 5 stars Funny
Having done some catering work in the past I could relate to the difficulties encountered but it's funny so I'd recommend to anyone.
Published 18 days ago by Saen
4.0 out of 5 stars Entertaining
A story well told though doesn't help you're faith in Humanity! However, this much more humanity (and the customers) fault than the authors!
Published 3 months ago by Stef
5.0 out of 5 stars All true
Having embarked on a similar adventure myself it all rings true. For over 20 years I had dreamed of running my on restaurant. Read more
Published 3 months ago by yarlyman
5.0 out of 5 stars So funny... so true1
Hilarious book! Having worked in the restaurant trade for over thirty years, I can certify that every word of this book is true! Read more
Published 4 months ago by Amazon Customer
4.0 out of 5 stars A funny read but perhaps not lighthearted
Plenty of good laughs and an insight in the awfulness of the public, in case you didn't know. It does become a bit whinging and depressing. Read more
Published 5 months ago by Mr. M. R. Wilkinson
3.0 out of 5 stars Not Bad
Something of a eye opener for those of us who have never worked in catering but after a while just seemed to be him complaining about just about everything.
Published 6 months ago by mmmppph
5.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant!
Great book for anyone who has worked in retail or hospitality industries! And a must read for anyone who hadn't!
Published 9 months ago by Sarah C Owen
4.0 out of 5 stars So true!
I laughed the whole way through this book because it was so true! I don't think people who weren't in the industry would actually believe it!
Published 11 months ago by country girl
4.0 out of 5 stars Makes you think!
I'd like to think that I'm no thing like this poor chaps customers, and I will make sure that I never become as dreadful!

A good read with some very amusing anecdotes.
Published 12 months ago by S. B. Cox
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