The Sociopath Next Door
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Who is the devil you know?
Is it your lying, cheating ex-husband?
Your sadistic high school gym teacher?
Your boss who loves to humiliate people in meetings?
The colleague who stole your idea and passed it off as her own?
In the pages of The Sociopath Next Door, you will realize that your ex was not just misunderstood. He’s a sociopath. And your boss, teacher, and colleague? They may be sociopaths too.
We are accustomed to think of sociopaths as violent criminals, but in The Sociopath Next Door, Harvard psychologist Martha Stout reveals that a shocking 4 percent of ordinary people—one in twenty-five—has an often undetected mental disorder, the chief symptom of which is that that person possesses no conscience. He or she has no ability whatsoever to feel shame, guilt, or remorse. One in twenty-five everyday Americans, therefore, is secretly a sociopath. They could be your colleague, your neighbor, even family. And they can do literally anything at all and feel absolutely no guilt.
How do we recognize the remorseless? One of their chief characteristics is a kind of glow or charisma that makes sociopaths more charming or interesting than the other people around them. They’re more spontaneous, more intense, more complex, or even sexier than everyone else, making them tricky to identify and leaving us easily seduced. Fundamentally, sociopaths are different because they cannot love. Sociopaths learn early on to show sham emotion, but underneath they are indifferent to others’ suffering. They live to dominate and thrill to win.
The fact is, we all almost certainly know at least one or more sociopaths already. Part of the urgency in reading The Sociopath Next Door is the moment when we suddenly recognize that someone we know—someone we worked for, or were involved with, or voted for—is a sociopath. But what do we do with that knowledge? To arm us against the sociopath, Dr. Stout teaches us to question authority, suspect flattery, and beware the pity play. Above all, she writes, when a sociopath is beckoning, do not join the game.
It is the ruthless versus the rest of us, and The Sociopath Next Door will show you how to recognize and defeat the devil you know.
Is it your lying, cheating ex-husband?
Your sadistic high school gym teacher?
Your boss who loves to humiliate people in meetings?
The colleague who stole your idea and passed it off as her own?
In the pages of The Sociopath Next Door, you will realize that your ex was not just misunderstood. He’s a sociopath. And your boss, teacher, and colleague? They may be sociopaths too.
We are accustomed to think of sociopaths as violent criminals, but in The Sociopath Next Door, Harvard psychologist Martha Stout reveals that a shocking 4 percent of ordinary people—one in twenty-five—has an often undetected mental disorder, the chief symptom of which is that that person possesses no conscience. He or she has no ability whatsoever to feel shame, guilt, or remorse. One in twenty-five everyday Americans, therefore, is secretly a sociopath. They could be your colleague, your neighbor, even family. And they can do literally anything at all and feel absolutely no guilt.
How do we recognize the remorseless? One of their chief characteristics is a kind of glow or charisma that makes sociopaths more charming or interesting than the other people around them. They’re more spontaneous, more intense, more complex, or even sexier than everyone else, making them tricky to identify and leaving us easily seduced. Fundamentally, sociopaths are different because they cannot love. Sociopaths learn early on to show sham emotion, but underneath they are indifferent to others’ suffering. They live to dominate and thrill to win.
The fact is, we all almost certainly know at least one or more sociopaths already. Part of the urgency in reading The Sociopath Next Door is the moment when we suddenly recognize that someone we know—someone we worked for, or were involved with, or voted for—is a sociopath. But what do we do with that knowledge? To arm us against the sociopath, Dr. Stout teaches us to question authority, suspect flattery, and beware the pity play. Above all, she writes, when a sociopath is beckoning, do not join the game.
It is the ruthless versus the rest of us, and The Sociopath Next Door will show you how to recognize and defeat the devil you know.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
43 of 44 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
We are accustomed to think of sociopaths as violent criminals like Hannibal Lechter or Ted Bundy.
Martha Stout in this book reveals how a shocking 4 percent of the population have the same chief symptom, namely a complete lack of conscience. The difference is that the majority with this mental disposition operate within the laws and only rarely get caught.
The book is easy to read without having a psych degree and Martha Stout uses many examples to show how these people charm and deceive their way through life in total disregard for the impact on other people.
Martha Stout further teaches how to identify a sociopath and how to protect oneself from the impact of one.
I found the book clear and light and also a celebration of the 96% who do have a conscience.
The book is well worth reading along with "In sheeps clothing" by George Simon, "Political Ponerology" by Andrzej Lobaczewski, "The mask of sanity" by Hervey Checkley and "Without conscience" by Robert Hare, that all deal with different aspects of the phenomenon.
Martha Stout in this book reveals how a shocking 4 percent of the population have the same chief symptom, namely a complete lack of conscience. The difference is that the majority with this mental disposition operate within the laws and only rarely get caught.
The book is easy to read without having a psych degree and Martha Stout uses many examples to show how these people charm and deceive their way through life in total disregard for the impact on other people.
Martha Stout further teaches how to identify a sociopath and how to protect oneself from the impact of one.
I found the book clear and light and also a celebration of the 96% who do have a conscience.
The book is well worth reading along with "In sheeps clothing" by George Simon, "Political Ponerology" by Andrzej Lobaczewski, "The mask of sanity" by Hervey Checkley and "Without conscience" by Robert Hare, that all deal with different aspects of the phenomenon.
42 of 44 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
In 'The Sociopath Next Door', Stout concentrates on those sociopaths who are not violent but who remain hidden amongst us. She estimates that 1 in 25 of the US population are sociopaths meaning that they have no concience.It's a claim that you might easily dismiss before reading the book, but haven't you met someone who seems to undermine your efforts at work for no apparent reason, who makes you feel sorry for them so that they can manipulate you, or someone who only thinks about themselves without an aparent care for anyone else?
Stout explains quite complex theories in language that is easy to understand. She looks at historical and Freudian theories about the nature of conscience. One of the most interesting parts for me was her consideration of the impact of Millgram's Obedience experiments and what this means for the general populations' risk of being manipulated by these people.
She also includes a handy 13 point plan that will prevent you being targeted.
An excellent study which is really easy to read. Recommended.
Stout explains quite complex theories in language that is easy to understand. She looks at historical and Freudian theories about the nature of conscience. One of the most interesting parts for me was her consideration of the impact of Millgram's Obedience experiments and what this means for the general populations' risk of being manipulated by these people.
She also includes a handy 13 point plan that will prevent you being targeted.
An excellent study which is really easy to read. Recommended.
52 of 55 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
Martha Stout provides a clear explanation and description of 'the sociopath' that ranges from simple examples of the devastating impact people without conscience are able to have, to an incisive and broad ranging overview of our understanding of morality. Dealing with sociopaths is tough, not least because they are arch-manipulators who know how to shape our emotional responses unseen and un-noticed by us because we make the assumption that they are driven by the same impulses as we are. This book makes it clear that this error is the most destructive one we can make - sociopaths are not 'like us', they can not 'be reasoned with' or 'reformed'. This knowledge is invaluable for anyone whose life comes in contact with a sociopath, but also fascinating for all who seek to understand human nature and why people do what they do!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
The Sociopath next door
Extremely helpful book to guide you to understand those work colleagues and friends who manipulate you due to their lack of concoscince. Read more
Published 1 month ago by M. J. Keegal
The nasty neighbour
Recently, a number of books have appeared that identify a bracket of `people without conscience'. Among these we have Flipnosis, Without conscience, In sheep's clothing, alongside... Read more
Published 1 month ago by James Taylor
The sociopath next door.
Best book I have read on the subject, depicts someone I have to deal with to a 'T'.
At the same time a very worrying book that everyone should read.
At the same time a very worrying book that everyone should read.
Published 1 month ago by westberks
Good Guys Go To Heaven, Bad Guys Don't Really Care
Imagine you are invited to go out for a night of fun. Imagine in order to do this you have to leave your baby alone and don't feed him/her till you're back (which may happen after... Read more
Published 1 month ago by Alberto
Guerillas in our midst
This is a fluent little book about bad people, worth reading. The case histories are obvious confabulations or fictions. Read more
Published 2 months ago by James-philip Harries
An extended supermarket magazine article
This is one of those books that means well, and the author is probably quite knowledgable, academic and experienced, but the result has been filtered down into something... Read more
Published 2 months ago by Ben Vex
Laypersons only
This is not a book for anyone well read and well informed about psychopathy but for me it was a fantastic starting point for further reading. Read more
Published 2 months ago by P. Humphries
The only one of its kind out there
If you have had your life blighted by a sociopath or a series of them this book,
will seem almost spooky because of the classic behaviours they exhibit so closely resemble... Read more
will seem almost spooky because of the classic behaviours they exhibit so closely resemble... Read more
Published 3 months ago by A. R. Ribley
Essential Reading
Speaking as a Christian, and not a psychologist, I found this book a brilliant essay on the nature of conscience, the age-old fight between good and evil, and the moral and... Read more
Published 4 months ago by Pilgrim
Fascinating, if disturbing, tale of the amoral
I read this pretty quickly; the detailed case studies about real individuals help to keep the narrative flowing at a good pace. I'm left with a couple of nagging concerns, though. Read more
Published 7 months ago by Mr. D. J. Sellers
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