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Sexually Shy: The Inhibited Woman's Guide To Good Sex [Paperback]

Bukod Books
3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
RRP: 8.57
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Book Description

29 May 2009
We all know the saying, "better than sex." Some people say that chocolate is better than sex. Others say that bungee jumping is better than sex. Still others claim that drugs are better than sex. Supposedly, there are a lot of things out there that are better than sex. However, I never use this phrase because, to me, there is nothing better than good sex. And in my opinion, people who use this phrase probably have never had good sex and most of the time it probably isn't even their fault. It's because they're sexually shy. Due to their upbringing or other factors in their lives, they become overly inhibited. This is what is keeping them from having the good sex that they deserve. That's what this book is about. It's about the stuff you need to know that no one bothered to tell you. It's about getting over your sexual shyness and freeing yourself to get to that better sex. Exploring subjects such as exhibitionism, repression, and oral sex, Sexually Shy: The Inhibited Woman's Guide To Good Sex is a must-read for anyone seeking a more fulfilling, less inhibited sex life.

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Product details

  • Paperback: 112 pages
  • Publisher: Bukod Books (29 May 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0984057463
  • ISBN-13: 978-0984057467
  • Product Dimensions: 12.7 x 20.3 x 0.7 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 382,936 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
31 of 31 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great guide to good sex. 23 Jun 2009
This book is all about overcoming inhibition. It's got some good stuff to know in it, including how to deal with baggage and overcome hinderances to good sex. However, it's also got some good sex tips as well and really gives some great advice on how to please a man while pleasing yourself, as well. I really liked it and was pleasantely suprised.
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12 of 14 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Not helpful at all! 13 Dec 2010
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I was really excited about this book because it seemed like the author understood that barriers to a healthy sex life aren't necessarily just a lack of new positions. Our inhibitions come from things that happened in our past or other sexual experiences. The book starts off really well, promising to address negative views of sex and dealing with suppression, but her advice only really boils down to "get over it" and "see a therapist", which wasn't what I was looking for. The whole reason I bought the book was so that I might not have to cough up the cash to go see one! Also, I found the author's writing style a bit too valley-girl to take seriously.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Postive take on the subject 20 Feb 2011
By dc
This is a great book to help overcome embarrassment and shame in regards to such matters. It shows in a very down to earth way that it's okay to want and experience intimacy.

What stuck me the most was the author's candid tone. She doesn't talk down to you but rather puts it in terms that anyone can understand. She really put a lot of thought into this book and, while reading, I couldn't help but feel some relief that I wasn't the only one with similar circumstances. Also she does it in a way that doesn't belittle or intimidate you.

The best part of the book, however, was, for me, the instruction and suggestions. They were easy to understand and easy to follow. The things I learned will stay with me for a while. It has made me think of things differently and with more positivity.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on (beta) 3.8 out of 5 stars  19 reviews
27 of 28 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars This book really helped me. 17 Sep 2009
By S. Clayton - Published on
I really benefited from this book. The author takes a very readable and relateable approach to a subject that so many women deal with - being overly inhibited. So many books out there assume that a woman has either been completely sheltered or is a oversexed wild uninhibited freak. This book meets the reader in the middle where most of us (I think) are. It is not overly clinical and does not attempt to psychoanalyze or berate the reader, but rahter gives tips and advice for overcoming inhibition in a very open and commonsense way.

I think that many parents, with all good intentions teach their daughters to be cautious and chaste (at least I would hope so!), but never really teach them when it's okay to let go. It's an uncomfortable subject, sure, but still it's an element that many of us lack. We never really learn when to take off the reins and enjoy ourselves sexually. This book can really hope overcome this. It uses real language and i think a very realistic approach to sexuality. It doesn't talk down to the reader but rather just gives tips to overcome the things that hang us up.

I highly recommend this book.
21 of 21 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars thinking of things in a new way... 9 Mar 2010
By S James - Published on
This book is a basic guide to help someone who needs to overcome feeling of shyness and intimadation in regards to common sex topics and how to approach their partner. It explains how it's OK to want and ask for sex and that not all sexual activities are bad or immoral despite a strong religous upbringing or other influences. This book is broken down into chapters that help readers cope with feelings and information about emotional baggage, repression, forgiveness, looks, orgasms, masturbation, porn, foreplay, and talking to your partner. It also explores options and alternatives to the traditional missionary position. There is nothing extreme, just helpful information to help the reader become more comfortable with their sexuality.

This book is not for someone who already has a lot of experience in a variety of sex situations but just doesn't know how to ask for it. If you are just looking for a better way to communicate with your partner, then I would suggest "Getting the Sex You Want: Shed Your Inhibitions and Reach New Heights of Passion Together" by Tammy Nelson.
32 of 35 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Help for the inhibited. 10 Jun 2009
By Hayden Kirkland - Published on
This book has been extraordinarily helpful to me. Having grown up in a very religious and strict home, it's hard to be very inhibited and have a lot of guilt regarding sex. However, after having read the author's viewpoint on the subject, I think that I'm finally overcoming it. It was so refreshing to read that someone else has had this problem and what they did to get past it. It's also good to have specific problems addressed without the author getting too clinical or dry. I recommend it strongly.
15 of 17 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Just Good, Not Great 24 Aug 2010
By Jackson Stephens - Published on
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I just finished this book a moment ago, and for some reason I feel compelled to write a review about it. Here's the lowdown in pros and cons.


* For the most part, I agree with everything the author says about sex and becoming less inhibited toward it. She says it's natural and nothing to be afraid of. It makes you feel good and enhances your relationship with your partner, so why wouldn't you want to be doing it all the time? Overall, she takes a very liberal-minded and refreshing approach to the subject.

* The author is really speaking from personal experience, and that is apparent from the examples she shares. It felt authentic, I guess.

* The book is candid and doesn't hold back any punches. The writer speaks openly and without shyness.

* It is short and to the point (104 small pages).


* The book is, to be kind, a bit on the amateur side. It's kind of an indie book, really. From the average quality print job on the cover to the depth of expertise expressed, make no bones about it that this is just one random woman's opinion. The author even states as much up front saying, "Keep in mind that I am just an ordinary person and not an 'expert.' . . ."

* Rather embarrassingly, the book includes some fairly glaring spelling and grammatical errors for a printed book.

* While I agree with the crux of the author's main argument and supporting ideas, some statements she makes just blow me away. They include unfounded generalizations and subjective opinions stated as fact. For instance, at one point she says, "[Men] really don't judge our fat rolls or cellulite and, truth be told, they never even notice them. . . ." Well, that's not completely true. As much as men love their wives, they do notice when they begin to gain weight, and the overall effect can be a loss of attraction. To put it another way, we notice it, and it's not exactly something we are happy about. The effect can obviously vary from guy to guy, and I'm not trying to sound callous here, but the statement is made to sound like fact when it's far from it. The truth is more complicated than a black-and-white statement like this. The book is full of this stuff, as though she's trying to have herself and her husband stand in for everyone else and their varied thoughts and feelings.

* I got the sense that the author is a normal woman who had a perspective to share and decided to write a book. A writer she is not, though. The writing is not professional enough. It is casual, yes, but sometimes too much so. Many sections are overly repetitive. Even though the book is extremely short and can be read in a few sittings, some of the chapters just felt like the same root idea repeated over and over again with different words. It made me feel bored after a while. Professional writers don't do this. I could just tell the difference.


I really wanted to like the book. And I'm not sad that I read it. It was an easy, breezy read. And hey, it was about sex, so it's hard to make the subject unenjoyable. But in the end, I'm not sure I really learned or took away much. The author's lack of expertise is too readily apparent. Ultimately, it was like talking to a good friend over coffee. I expect more than that when I invest money and time into a book.
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Don't be shy, get this book! 20 Feb 2010
By Kara Grady - Published on
The author of this book has done a great service for women. Being sexually shy is a problem for many women. The bigger problem is that no one really talks about it. I suppose we're all supposed to be these hanging from the chandelier naked people. Well, some of us aren't and for that, we get called names that don't really fit well with us. However, thank God, there are books like this that not only tell us how to overcome our hesitances in the bedroom, but also tell us that this is normal. Other than that, it's all about getting over inhibitions.

The author does a standup job of how to get over inhibitions and get a great sex life. This one should not be overlooked.
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