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Customer Reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars26
4.4 out of 5 stars
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on 21 June 2006
This book is a real gem. The author shows you what healthy interaction should look like and how to confront or change your relationships with those who are not emotionally healthy, or accept that they are not able/willing to change at this point in time and avoid them....guilt free.

As a christian I really appreciated the practical help combined with biblical knowledge and it busts some of the wrong thinking and wrong teaching that we often have e.g. turn the other cheek = act like a doormat!
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on 9 August 2005
This is a lovely little book, enjoyable and easy to read. It helps reconcile the Christian teachings with modern life, explaining some "simple" truths about life and relating to others in a helpful manner. Great reminder of the need to cherish our spiritual and emotional needs in times of trouble. I find it truly inspiring in the process of personal growth and fulfilment. The summaries at the end of each chapter make it easy to revisit and consult when in doubt... Highly recommended!
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on 25 November 1997
I work as a lay counselor at our church. This book is wonderfully written and will be a tremendous resource for our library. I am so grateful to Dr. Cloud and Dr. Townsend for the taking the time to write such helpful information. Their book Boundries has already become very popular and I am sure this one will as well. Practical, real and honest, they deal with matters of the heart that often trip so many of us up. It's scriptural, loving and holds up a mirror so we can see ourselves. A very useful thing indeed!
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on 7 August 2010
I am glad I found this book!!The language, descriptions are very clear, concise and afer initial reading I easily recognised patterns of some unsafe or truly toxic people around me.The book helped me to recognised some of these patterns in myself ,and what to do in order to get rid of them and lead more healthy, assertive life .Very helpful, insightful , positive book.!I bought additionally some books on codependency as it complements this book perfectly, Many of toxic or unsafe people come from unloving,destructive families ,and are themselves the victims of toxic parenting like myself. This book is full a good advice, solutions. It simply is A LITTLE GEM!!!It gave me a lot of confidence I lacked when dealing with toxic people.But most importantly I got finally rid of an awful feeling of guilt eating my heart away each time I tried to limit or avoid toxic people.
As a Christian , I know now that it is ok to avoid , limit or cut off completely some unhealthy people fom my life and still be ok with it.
I highly recommend this book. : )
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on 16 May 1998
This book is written so well, so clear, and so boldly that one leaves it having gained a new confidence in choosing healthy relationships. These authors are straight forward and to the point, and write with no room for "sissyness". For example, they clearly point out the things you may be doing to contribute to the "drooping" state of your relationships. (Otherwise, you wouldn't be reading this review. A workbook for the paperback edition is also available.) I regret that the rating only goes up to ten, as this book DESERVES a 20 out of ten. If you are an adult or almost an adult, then you are required to (I can't REALLY order you to but I wish I could) read this. This book is THAT GOOD and it's message THAT IMPORTANT! Order it yesterday!
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on 23 December 2010
This little book has been priceless in letting me 'see' some of the flaws and shortcomings there have been in my own life over the years. Personal flaws that have caused immense hurt, pain, sorrow and loss to myself and others. Reading it has been like looking into a mirror. Most importantly, reading it has given me great hope and encouragement that self-destructive patterns CAN change; my heart melt, and a new beginning emerge in the develoment of vital safe relationships. I would strongly reccommend this book to those who seek safe relationships and to those who wish to be 'Safe People' for others. 'Safe People' - a wonderful little book; a tremendous blessing! Thank you so much Dr's H.Cloud & J.Townsend.
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on 14 August 2007
A great book, it doesn't take much to get to grips with the knowledge it contains and if like me you are really getting fed up with the wrong type of people I'd recommend it as a place to get some practical idea's about what's going on with the relationships in your life.
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on 23 June 2010
These guys are gifted Christian psychologists who write in a very accessible way for those of us without psychology degrees! This book is excellent and good to read as a follow-on to "Boundaries" by the same authors.
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on 13 November 2014
For those who has never met the safe people, so naturally would not be able to recognise them if they would stand next to them, it will be a good guidance of what safe people really are. How they behave, how they think and how happy they can make you feel.

They make you feel happy, because with safe people it is OK to make mistakes, to admit to them and to learn how to fix them - they help you, and not reject you, if this makes sense.

This book grew my awareness and provided a motivation to became a safe person as well.
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on 5 June 2015
This book genuinely turned my life around. I was caught in such a rutt of continuous drama's I was at my wits end. This book was recommended to me so I read it which resulted in me making dramatic changes to my life. It was the best thing I could have done and I couldn't be happier now, i have a wonderful relationship with a loving husband. I still recommend this book to anyone in need and i will continue to do so for the rest of my life.
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