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Product Description
Review
"The book will prove to be a real lifesaver." --Louise Bates Ames, author and association director, Gessell Institute of Human "Through excellent examples and easy-to-read text, this book provides parents with a pathway to understanding their child's temperament and to a place where parents can balance the needs of their child's unique temperament with their own needs and those of their family." -- James Cameron, Ph.D., executive director, The Preventive Ounce, Berkeley, California
Product Description
Now in a new updated version, Kurcinka offers parents the most up-to-date research, effective strategies and real life stories for: managing intensity - not just the kids, but parents too; getting the sleep every family needs and deserves; choosing their battles; helping children to hear their instructions; assisting children in getting along with siblings and peers; and, being successful in school and at home. Spirited children possess traits we value in adults, yet find challenging in children. Studies now show that these children are 'wired' to be more reactive to the world around them. The solution, rather than medication or punishment, is understanding temperament and working with it. Kurcinka in a supportive, warm style is able to reveal to parents how to do it, often leading them to ask, 'How did she get into my home'? Winner of the Parents' Choice Award, voted one of the top twenty books for parents, and a real life saver for parents, this updated version is eagerly awaited by parents and professionals.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
14 of 14 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
Reading this book was like someone switching the light on! This explains so many things about why my wonderful and energetic child challenges me on every level. From the simple advice of re-labling (from stubborn to persistant, from impatient to excited....) to the amazing and effective advice on why I have been held prisoner between 7pm - 9pm every night for months while my son tries to cling to me incase I leave his bedside. Finally I am reassured that my little boy is normal and spirited - a wonderful word - and he DOES respond. He is not naughty, and I am NOT a bad parent! YAY! If you are wondering how other mothers cope while you are a bag of nervous exhaustion, PLEASE read this book!
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
Mary Sheedy Kurcinka does an excellent job of providing good common sense answers to why children are spirited and practical ways of dealing with the behavior. Observation, analysis and then appropriate action are keys to dealing with this behavior.
For example, in one Section called CHECK SIMULATION Levels Kurcinka writes:
"I always tell parents in my classes that if they ever feel like they are the only parent in the world with a sensitive spirited child, they should drop everything and head for the largest, noisiest, most congested store in their area. There they will find spirited kids dropping like little bombs. Two down one isle. Three in aisle four--the candy shelf--and six in aisle seven--the toy department. At first glance it will appear that the explosions are triggered by a denial to buy a candy bar, a desire to push the cart, or some other insignificant issue. The real trigger, however, is hidden in the fluorescent lights, piped-in-music, flashing signs, colorful packages, and crush of people that create more stimulation than a sensitive child can endure, especially if his or her energy bank is low."
She goes on to write:
"As a parent of a spirited child, you have to become aware of stimulation cues and recognize the breaking point for your child. The level of stimulation that pushes her beyond her ability to cope."
Kurcinka also explores subjects such as introverted and extroverted children, how they recharge their batteries and how to handle them. Other subjects include: How to deal with tantrums, Getting along with other kids, Motivating kids to listen and much more.
Overall an exceptional book on looking at cause, effect and practical solutions for addressing spirited children. Highly recommended.
The Re-Discovery of Common Sense: A Guide To: The Lost Art of Critical Thinking
For example, in one Section called CHECK SIMULATION Levels Kurcinka writes:
"I always tell parents in my classes that if they ever feel like they are the only parent in the world with a sensitive spirited child, they should drop everything and head for the largest, noisiest, most congested store in their area. There they will find spirited kids dropping like little bombs. Two down one isle. Three in aisle four--the candy shelf--and six in aisle seven--the toy department. At first glance it will appear that the explosions are triggered by a denial to buy a candy bar, a desire to push the cart, or some other insignificant issue. The real trigger, however, is hidden in the fluorescent lights, piped-in-music, flashing signs, colorful packages, and crush of people that create more stimulation than a sensitive child can endure, especially if his or her energy bank is low."
She goes on to write:
"As a parent of a spirited child, you have to become aware of stimulation cues and recognize the breaking point for your child. The level of stimulation that pushes her beyond her ability to cope."
Kurcinka also explores subjects such as introverted and extroverted children, how they recharge their batteries and how to handle them. Other subjects include: How to deal with tantrums, Getting along with other kids, Motivating kids to listen and much more.
Overall an exceptional book on looking at cause, effect and practical solutions for addressing spirited children. Highly recommended.
The Re-Discovery of Common Sense: A Guide To: The Lost Art of Critical Thinking
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
I recognised my son instantly on reading this book - though he is not at the extreme end of spirited. I recognised his energy instantly e.g. he cannot really walk quietly along in the street but likes to "dance" along, or pretend to play football, or just waive his hands around! In very excitable surroudings e.g. festivals he can get incredibly excited and very loud and boistrous, and people do look at me!
I found all the guidance very comforting. I just kinda "relaxed" after spending the last year or so wondering what is going on. And - I notice - he kind of relaxed too - though it is early days.
One thing i wasn't expecting was to recognise myself - the sensitivity and the INTENSITY which i found hard to handle, and express, without alienating people, in my own life. I hope with my help my son is able to navigate these traits.
Finally, a word of warning - so thrilled (my intensity!) to have found an explanation that made sense and was so positive and creative - I mentioned it to his teacher and some strangers. The teacher looked a little puzzled (fair enough), but the strangers (on-line) got very angry indeed.
I found all the guidance very comforting. I just kinda "relaxed" after spending the last year or so wondering what is going on. And - I notice - he kind of relaxed too - though it is early days.
One thing i wasn't expecting was to recognise myself - the sensitivity and the INTENSITY which i found hard to handle, and express, without alienating people, in my own life. I hope with my help my son is able to navigate these traits.
Finally, a word of warning - so thrilled (my intensity!) to have found an explanation that made sense and was so positive and creative - I mentioned it to his teacher and some strangers. The teacher looked a little puzzled (fair enough), but the strangers (on-line) got very angry indeed.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
Not what I was expecting
I purchased this book a little while ago, while hoping for some decent tips on raising a spirited child. I read the reviews first and thought it sounded perfect. Read more
Published 4 months ago by Claire
Oh yes my son is so spirited ... so am I !!!
Very interesting book. I thought I was reading about my son. I used to say my 4-year-old son was very very fussy about everything but after reading this book I felt much better. Read more
Published 7 months ago by mikinka
Raising Any child
Fabulous manual for any parent bringing up any child. I am a Granny from a lifetime career in Education and this is the best book I have read in terms of understanding child and... Read more
Published 10 months ago by Grannie Annie
See your child in a different light
This has been a lifesaver, ordered in desperation after many challenging encounters with our daughter it has helped me see her in a very different light. Read more
Published 11 months ago by Gazza
kat
Great book arrived ontime in good order was an interesting book filled with tips on how to handle a
sassy child!
sassy child!
Published 12 months ago by kati
This is a must read - the newly revised version IS better than the old...
At last someone who understands my child (and me as a spirited adult, by the way) and offers practical strategies that work. Read more
Published on 14 April 2010 by Nathalie Fradin-Hood
Very useful
Am reading this at the moment and finding it very useful in giving practical ideas to help with my spirited child. Read more
Published on 7 Dec 2009 by Mary loves reading
I can believe that this is an award winning author
A fantastic and practical insight into the concept of a spirited child, the effect he has on people around him, and how to manage and look after him best. Read more
Published on 19 Nov 2009 by A. Tang
Fabulous book
I bought this book for a friend 4 years ago when she was having trouble with her son who was 7. As soon as she read it she recognized that she had a spirited child and the book... Read more
Published on 26 Nov 2008 by Mr. Deane Mummery
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