Now in a new updated version, Kurcinka offers parents the most up-to-date research, effective strategies and real life stories for: managing intensity - not just the kids, but parents too; getting the sleep every family needs and deserves; choosing their battles; helping children to hear their instructions; assisting children in getting along with siblings and peers; and, being successful in school and at home. Spirited children possess traits we value in adults, yet find challenging in children. Studies now show that these children are 'wired' to be more reactive to the world around them. The solution, rather than medication or punishment, is understanding temperament and working with it. Kurcinka in a supportive, warm style is able to reveal to parents how to do it, often leading them to ask, 'How did she get into my home'? Winner of the Parents' Choice Award, voted one of the top twenty books for parents, and a real life saver for parents, this updated version is eagerly awaited by parents and professionals.
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"The book will prove to be a real lifesaver." --Louise Bates Ames, author and association director, Gessell Institute of Human "Through excellent examples and easy-to-read text, this book provides parents with a pathway to understanding their child's temperament and to a place where parents can balance the needs of their child's unique temperament with their own needs and those of their family." -- James Cameron, Ph.D., executive director, The Preventive Ounce, Berkeley, California
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
15 of 15 people found the following review helpful
By C. Clayton
Format:Paperback
Mary Sheedy Kurcinka does an excellent job of providing good common sense answers to why children are spirited and practical ways of dealing with the behavior. Observation, analysis and then appropriate action are keys to dealing with this behavior.
For example, in one Section called CHECK SIMULATION Levels Kurcinka writes:
"I always tell parents in my classes that if they ever feel like they are the only parent in the world with a sensitive spirited child, they should drop everything and head for the largest, noisiest, most congested store in their area. There they will find spirited kids dropping like little bombs. Two down one isle. Three in aisle four--the candy shelf--and six in aisle seven--the toy department. At first glance it will appear that the explosions are triggered by a denial to buy a candy bar, a desire to push the cart, or some other insignificant issue. The real trigger, however, is hidden in the fluorescent lights, piped-in-music, flashing signs, colorful packages, and crush of people that create more stimulation than a sensitive child can endure, especially if his or her energy bank is low."
She goes on to write:
"As a parent of a spirited child, you have to become aware of stimulation cues and recognize the breaking point for your child. The level of stimulation that pushes her beyond her ability to cope."
Kurcinka also explores subjects such as introverted and extroverted children, how they recharge their batteries and how to handle them. Other subjects include: How to deal with tantrums, Getting along with other kids, Motivating kids to listen and much more.
Overall an exceptional book on looking at cause, effect and practical solutions for addressing spirited children. Highly recommended.
The Re-Discovery of Common Sense: A Guide To: The Lost Art of Critical Thinking
For example, in one Section called CHECK SIMULATION Levels Kurcinka writes:
"I always tell parents in my classes that if they ever feel like they are the only parent in the world with a sensitive spirited child, they should drop everything and head for the largest, noisiest, most congested store in their area. There they will find spirited kids dropping like little bombs. Two down one isle. Three in aisle four--the candy shelf--and six in aisle seven--the toy department. At first glance it will appear that the explosions are triggered by a denial to buy a candy bar, a desire to push the cart, or some other insignificant issue. The real trigger, however, is hidden in the fluorescent lights, piped-in-music, flashing signs, colorful packages, and crush of people that create more stimulation than a sensitive child can endure, especially if his or her energy bank is low."
She goes on to write:
"As a parent of a spirited child, you have to become aware of stimulation cues and recognize the breaking point for your child. The level of stimulation that pushes her beyond her ability to cope."
Kurcinka also explores subjects such as introverted and extroverted children, how they recharge their batteries and how to handle them. Other subjects include: How to deal with tantrums, Getting along with other kids, Motivating kids to listen and much more.
Overall an exceptional book on looking at cause, effect and practical solutions for addressing spirited children. Highly recommended.
The Re-Discovery of Common Sense: A Guide To: The Lost Art of Critical Thinking
25 of 26 people found the following review helpful
By Helen C
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
Reading this book was like someone switching the light on! This explains so many things about why my wonderful and energetic child challenges me on every level. From the simple advice of re-labling (from stubborn to persistant, from impatient to excited....) to the amazing and effective advice on why I have been held prisoner between 7pm - 9pm every night for months while my son tries to cling to me incase I leave his bedside. Finally I am reassured that my little boy is normal and spirited - a wonderful word - and he DOES respond. He is not naughty, and I am NOT a bad parent! YAY! If you are wondering how other mothers cope while you are a bag of nervous exhaustion, PLEASE read this book!
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
By Gazza
Format:Paperback
This has been a lifesaver, ordered in desperation after many challenging encounters with our daughter it has helped me see her in a very different light. The author explains what it means to be spirited and what it means for the parents of a spirited child. She goes through the various personality traits and gives ideas of ways in which you may approach life with a spirited child differently. She is realistic in her approach and does not promise miracles, her mantra is progress not perfection and I really feel that is what we are achieving in our family. I like the way she draws on many real life experiences of the people she has worked with.
Really well worth reading - my husband no longer thinks our daughter might have ADHD or that she is a naughty child and is able to understand her and see her in a positive light.
Really well worth reading - my husband no longer thinks our daughter might have ADHD or that she is a naughty child and is able to understand her and see her in a positive light.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars
Oh my goodness this came just at the right time
Having spent several years despairing with my son I saw this book and decided it was worth a try. The first chapter had me in tears as I realised there were other people out there... Read more
Published 3 months ago by mrs kezia luckett
5.0 out of 5 stars
Fantastic
This is a fantastic book. We have been struggling to cope with our sons behaviour since he was little and have tried so many different techniques over the years. Read more
Published 3 months ago by CEH
5.0 out of 5 stars
Fantastic book thank you
Fantastic read. For parents of any child that does not fit the textbook behaviour. Will refer to this book again and again no doubt. Read more
Published 4 months ago by Mrs Claire Anne Nicholson
5.0 out of 5 stars
Helpful and valuable resource for first time parents
I have found this book very helpful in terms of helping me to address my thoughts and attitudes toward my son regarding aspects of his behaviour. Read more
Published 5 months ago by sonia minteh
5.0 out of 5 stars
Very reassuring and great reference book.
My younger daughter has such a very different temperament to her older sister - the latter I realise is relatively easygoing and obliging, whilst the younger one is contrary,... Read more
Published 8 months ago by JJ
1.0 out of 5 stars
Not what I was expecting
I purchased this book a little while ago, while hoping for some decent tips on raising a spirited child. I read the reviews first and thought it sounded perfect. Read more
Published 16 months ago by Claire
5.0 out of 5 stars
Oh yes my son is so spirited ... so am I !!!
Very interesting book. I thought I was reading about my son. I used to say my 4-year-old son was very very fussy about everything but after reading this book I felt much better. Read more
Published 18 months ago by mikinka
5.0 out of 5 stars
Raising Any child
Fabulous manual for any parent bringing up any child. I am a Granny from a lifetime career in Education and this is the best book I have read in terms of understanding child and... Read more
Published 22 months ago by Grannie Annie
5.0 out of 5 stars
kat
Great book arrived ontime in good order was an interesting book filled with tips on how to handle a
sassy child!
sassy child!
Published 23 months ago by kati
5.0 out of 5 stars
This is a must read - the newly revised version IS better than the old...
At last someone who understands my child (and me as a spirited adult, by the way) and offers practical strategies that work. Read more
Published on 14 April 2010 by Nathalie Fradin-Hood
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