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How to Prevent Unicorns from Stealing Your Car and Other Funny Stories. (Lunch Break Funnies, Humor Book Series)
 
 

How to Prevent Unicorns from Stealing Your Car and Other Funny Stories. (Lunch Break Funnies, Humor Book Series) [Kindle Edition]

Oleg Medvedkov , Kaycee Hughes , Hercules Editing
2.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)

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Product Description

Product Description

Imagine yourself reading humorous stories by Mark Twain, Jerome K. Jerome, Ambrose Bierce, or O. Henry. Or watching Blackadder and Dick Van Dyke make funny jokes. Well, this is not it, exactly. However, this is as close as it gets for a modern humor book.

Here you'll find a collection of funny stories. While designed to be the funniest book for years to come, this turned out to be merely hilarious, with a few funny jokes and humorous punchlines. The humor in this book comes from the dialog and interaction between characters and is based on the following idea:

★WHEN YOU EXCLUDE ANYTHING THAT IS IMPROBABLE, WHATEVER IS LEFT, IS NOT AS HILARIOUS.★

What this is not: intellectual humor, political satire, or a humorous book that makes you think. This is simply a "laugh out loud" entertainment, as silly as it gets. If and when you have a few minutes to kill and need a laugh, that's when reading this self-proclaimed "humor book" comes in handy.
 
✔ Car theft by the seemingly unstoppable Unicorns has become rampant. Protect your vehicle from these paranormally despicable evildoers by reading this easy How-To guide.
✔ The CIA secret agent is trying to infiltrate the infamous KGB. Would the spy succeed in becoming a double agent or would his mission sidetrack into a more ridiculously gripping "danger zone"?
✔ Any touching love poem translated verbatim from medieval French is laugh out loud hilarious to a modern reader. The Eye is a Window to the Soul is doubly so.
✔ An enthusiastic pitbull with an unstoppable zest for life makes a new friend. Would he listen to his wise girlfriend who wants to keep him grounded or would he go where no dog has gone before?
...and more!

➨ Oleg Medvedkov is funny, no, Oleg Medvedkov spins tales of uncovering the wildest forms of human behavior - that sound strangely plausible. And that is one reason he is so hilarious - his insanities skip past us every day. Oleg just notices them for what they are. -Grady Harp, Top 50 Reviewer, Hall of Fame Reviewer
➨ Humorous stories that are delivered in a fast-paced madcap style that never slowed down. -J. Chambers, Top 50 Reviewer
➨ The pages flew by. -Dennis Littrell, Top 500 Reviewer, Hall of Fame Reviewer

P.S. If you've had the perseverance to read the above self-serving nonsense that is designed to make you buy this book all the way up to this point, consider me duly impressed - you are a saint. We should do lunch sometime.

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 274 KB
  • Print Length: 34 pages
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B00856387I
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Average Customer Review: 2.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #133,316 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious 12 Oct 2013
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
This book I amazing! Full appreciation to Oleg( the author) I truly admire him. I would recommend this book to anyone who loves a laugh. Couldn't stop smiling! My particular favourite was Spy's letter which you can read if you purchase the free sample.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Absurd and amusing 24 July 2013
By Amazon Customer TOP 500 REVIEWER
Format:Kindle Edition
"How to Prevent Unicorns from Stealing Your Car and Other Funny Stories (Take a Break & Have a Laugh Series.)" by Oleg Medvedkov is a lovely selection of funny short stories, most non-sensical, absurd and all most entertaining.
The title story is an actual check list of things to do to avoid theft of your car by said unicorns. Other stories concern a spy mission that went off the rails, current trends in communication ( and its technology) and the polishing of one's publuc image, to name but a few.
With wit and warmth Medvedkov has a laugh with the objects of his humour instead of ridiculing them heartlessly. At times it shows however that there are observations and truth behind the fun. Light hearted and pleasant the book is a very nice way to spend an afternoon
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
By Dennis Littrell TOP 500 REVIEWER
Format:Kindle Edition
The first vignette, "The Spy Letter," afforded me some chuckles. The next few pieces, despite elaborate word coinages and over-the-top attempts at hilarity (suffused with an underlying satirical intent) merely raised my eyebrows (both at the same time).

Yet the pages flew by. Then I came upon "The Eye is a Window to the Soul" purporting to be a French folk song written by Baron Alphonse de Hugg in the 11th Century that was translated from the medieval tongue by a "Professor Tilly-Pimkin." This reminded me distantly (very distantly) of the unconscious deleterious self-revelations in Browning's poem "My Last Duchess" and I was again returned to bemusement (or was that stomach gas?). At any rate, for your delectation I will quote a line or two.

"When I am told that eyes don't shine, I laugh and kick my servants. For if I don't kick them, then who will? The cross I have to bear."
...
"I also like to hunt wild boars and shoot them from afar. For boars are nasty creatures who remind me of Germans, yet tastier."

As for the title tale, it begins like this: "I've been asked by the only reader of my blog how to prevent unicorns from stealing your cars. Mom, it is your lucky day!" A couple of pages later the narrator recalls, "...unicorns took the Pope-mobile for a joy ride. They returned it in the end, but not before they covered it with vulgar graffiti and the entire works of Karl Marx."

I thought the longest piece in the book, the "Meeting of the Transient Luminaries Transcript" was a bit overdone, kind of like chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream covered in whipped cream and melted chocolate fudge washed down with a 64-ounce draft of Coca Cola.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A short and funny read 30 July 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I'd say that my favourite sections were "How to 'Wax Lyrical' for Fun and Profit" and "How to Prevent Unicorns from Stealing your Car" as they fit my type of humour better. Altogether there are eight though, so I think there will be a little for everyone to enjoy.

I don't have much time to read so I was surprised to get through this book so quickly. I think I might have liked another story or two, but the length won't stop me from looking into other books in the series as it kept me entertained.
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1.0 out of 5 stars Not a great read 27 Jun 2014
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Not what I expected from the title (which I thought was very clever) - the initial story was fairly good, but it seemed to deteriorate after that. Not even, in my mind, very funny. I'm glad it was free. I'd have been peeved if I'd actually paid out money for this.
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1.0 out of 5 stars Odd sense of humour 26 May 2014
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Not my cup of tea. I was hoping for a Monty Pythonesque type of writing. Weird and incoherent is not always funny
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