Perfect Parenting: The Dictionary of 1,000 Parenting Tips (Pantley) [Paperback]

From the first page it was obvious that I had judged this book wrong. Out of this book jumped a new, wonderful, and inventive idea in parenting books. It is not cut-and-dry: "you did this wrong, you must do this to fix it." No, something much more creative and helpful treated me that day. A book chock full of ideas...good ideas. And not just one, but a few different ideas to resolve a problem as the same problem does not always have the same root.

As the mom of an Eight Year Old bed-wetter, I jumped right to the "B's" (this book is arranged alphabetically, what a simplistic but wonderful idea!) and looked to see what wisdom awaited me. This, like all topics, is broken down into sections: Situation, Think About It, and Solutions.

"SITUATION My child is out of diapers but continues to wet the bed. THINK ABOUT IT Bed-wetting has come out of the closet and is now recoginized as a common childhood problem. Twenty percent of five-year-olds and 10 percent of six-year-olds routinely wet their beds...."

Perfect Parenting, Pages 32 & 33

This particular topic then had not one, but five different solutions depending on age and situation. Most of the ideas we have tried but there were a few new ones that we are working on. Yes, I admit it; I am following an 'advice book'.

This book is not only helpful, but also interesting to read. The broad range of topics amazed me and it was interesting to see problems in print that you thought only your family had. One of my favourites was "Bathroom Jokes". As the mother of a six-year-old son, we have to deal with this quite often!

Other unique topics include:

* Bicycle, care of *Bicycle, won't wear helmet *Car, fighting in back seat *Day Care, cries when left at *Gifts, rude response to *Manners, at meal time *Read, doesn't want to *Telephone Interruptions *Vegetables, won't eat them *Video Games, excessive use of

If you want a book that is not only helpful and insightful but a good entertaining read, this is a wonderful book for you. Elizabeth Pantley has done a wonderful job and changed my mind about Parenting Books.

Under each topic there are multiple creative options that go beyond the typical advice like time out - and they work very well!

A few examples:
Under Siblings, fighting (physcial):
Have the aggressor do a chore for the injured sibling, such as make his bed or take out the trash. (How they love this!)

Under Vegetables, won't eat them:
Sneak vegetables into other foods, such as chopped spinach in meat loaf, peas in tuna salad, grated zucchini in hamburgers or Start calling green vegetables Brain Food and let them know it will make them smarter and stronger.

Under Parents Anger:
If your anger causes you to strike your child you can control your outbursts...channel your physical reaction into a burst of applause. When you feel yourself about to strike, clap your hands, good and hard and fast while you express your feelings of anger. (It sends a very clear message to your child.)

This is a very helpful book and I would highly recommend it.

The book is written in dictionary-style. It's most useful as a resource guide sitting on the shelf patiently awaiting the next parenting conundrum.

I like this format because I hate sitting down and just reading a parenting book. By the time an actual problem arises I've forgotten everything I've read. I would rather use parenting books on an as-needed basis rather than reading them from cover-to-cover. "Perfect Parenting" fits this bill "perfectly."

I gave the book the acid test and used it immediately on some of my own parenting situations. We had the little matter of siblings disrespecting each other on a daily--hourly?--basis and I found some helpful hints under "Siblings, hateful emotions" (no, I'm not making this category up--kinda scary, but it fit my situation).

This little exercise did, however, point out one of the book's shortcomings regarding basic organization. The book has no index (one of my personal literary pet peeves) which makes it more difficult to find information. The book does have a comprehensive index-like table of contents, but in my opinion it does not replace the need for a true index.

But don't let this small quibble discourage you from this book. Overall, the book is excellent and I have turned to it many times.

BOTTOM LINE: It's a buy. Keep it handy for all those challenging parenting moments when your brain can't work fast enough!