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On the Origin of Findo Gask [Kindle Edition]

David McCreight
4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (29 customer reviews)

Print List Price: £8.06
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Book Description

A Comedy. Oh Yes.

The Black Isle in the Scottish Highlands may well be a tourist's ideal: ancient villages in a beautiful rolling coastal landscape filled with myth and legend; but who the hell would want to grow up there? Certainly not Findo Gask, former child prodigy and by some distance Scotland's ugliest sixteen year old. He's stuck in his Gran's tiny house at the far end of a long single track road and no girl will even look at him, let alone touch his cock.

In a simple story of being sixteen in a place where nothing ever happens, (apart from trying to get served under-age; everybody hating him; suspected demonic possession; Mum's mystery illness; his nutter Cousin; his nutter Cousin's nutter friend; the terrible misuse of farm equipment; bringing down Christianity; the family mermaid; exams; a spot of kidnapping; the legend of Bonnie Prince Charlie's silver spoons, and happening to be the person who solved the universe that morning without even using maths). All Findo really wants to do is to get drunk this weekend and somehow learn to cope with the forlorn hope of ever finding someone who'll want to touch his cock. As for the Darwinian Terrorist Organisation he started when he was twelve: well that's all behind him now.

Product Description

About the Author

You don't really want to know anything about the idiot who wrote this thing now do you, it'll only spoil the book. And you certainly wouldn't want to see a photo, it would make you sick up all over your keyboard which is hellish to try and get out, and then you'll be so busy cleaning up the mess you'll forget to buy the book. So just go and buy it now, and have a lovely time reading it, and try to forget you ever even considered wanting to know anything about the terrible man whose bad and scary mind this book fell out of.

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 1331 KB
  • Print Length: 267 pages
  • Publisher: David McCreight; 1 edition (3 April 2013)
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B00C7A6WHG
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (29 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #199,835 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
By WeeVee
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I have been spotting wee blue fish dotted about the Black Isle for some time now but as Kindle is the spawn of the devil have had to wait to get my hands on a paper copy (which could have been better proofed, but that's just a minor quibble).

List of those who will take offence:

Humourless evangelical Christians - you know who you are, and I've sat through your services and thought what the f*** too.
Humourless residents of Avoch - bigtime.
Humourless residents of Cromarty - in fact humourless Black Isle residents generally. Would recommend full body armour out there, David, or at least a nice wee knitted balaclava.
A fair number of humourless teaching staff at Fortrose Academy, Avoch Primary etc.
The Rector's Dog, now as then.

But the rest of the world will love it. This book is a shocking, howling, laugh-out-loud, read-bits-aloud-to-your-friends read. The denouement is unpredictable, eye-wateringly explicit and oddly magical.

The mind of a disaffected teenage boy isn't always a pleasant place to be but it took me straight back to my own youth on the Black Isle with unsettling accuracy. Findo Gask was the kid who trod on my feet while we were being forcibly inducted into Strip the Willow. If any teachers read this review, please buy this book. Smuggle it under the desk in a plain brown wrapper to any spotty teenage lad who refuses to open a book. He'll never look back.

Can we look forward to Findo Gask part two - the adult years, David?

Planning to forward a more extensive review to local/national press when I can find a minute.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Funny and filthy 2 Jun. 2014
By JAP2010
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I laughed out loud, frequently, reading this on the train. I reckon it will resonate with anyone who grew up in a rural community. I'm keen for my kids to read it - they are at the schools mentioned in the book - but not until they are 16 perhaps (it's not a book for those of a delicate disposition). It's funny and filthy but is quite thought-provoking. It would make a brilliant film - a cross between Gregory's Girl and Pulp Fiction. I hope Mr McCreight is beating down the doors of a small indy production company somewhere - and the Scottish Tourist Board. I'd buy the DVD.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Disgustingly funny 23 July 2013
By Maglet
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I live near the village of Findo Gask in Perthshire, so was drawn to the title of the book. It's nothing to do with the village, of course - just a great name for an unfortunate character with beautiful eyes. Loved the book, even if I did embarrass myself by laughing out loud while reading it on a busy train. Perhaps not for the faint hearted, but great to find out how Findo came to have such beautiful brown eyes.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A hoot 14 July 2013
Format:Kindle Edition
Sick, warped, twisted and extremely funny. A novel plot with pace and originality. Inventive use of language stays with the reader long after it's all over. Deeply irreverent and wonderfully pointless.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Hilariously original 4 July 2013
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Anyone who has ever travelled the A9 will understand the notoriety of Findo Gask. With excoriating, laser-like precision this precocious teenager tramples all over the notion that the highlands are in any way 'twee'. Filed mentally between Hunter S Thomspon and Kurt Vonnegut, this book appears to have all the subtlety of a whack round the head by a plank, but look more closely and some the most deliciously-observed nuance and original use of metaphor and analogy appears. I get the feeling that Mr McCreight would hate me to say this but, at times, it's positively literary. A marvellous achievement.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Worth every penny! 14 May 2013
By Emma
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I would recommend this book to anyone who likes reading, or who knows someone who likes reading, or who has ever considered reading. In 'The Origin of Findo Gask' David McCreight paints a remarkably vivid picture of a very dark corner of the Scottish Highlands, and does so with much humour and great storytelling skill. The characters are unlikable, the setting bleak, the language rude, the content blasphemous and the story unbelievable, but once you start reading it, it's hard to put it down. I laughed so much it hurt.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Blasphemy at it's furthest extremity. 9 May 2013
Format:Kindle Edition
David McCreight is a sick and twisted BLASPHEMER, the like of which I have never before now encountered. A BLASPHEMER of such a magnitude that he is in danger of ripping a large, unrepairable hole in the fabric of space and time. A hole so BLASPHEMOUS, that even God's own sewing machine would be sadly ineffective in a repair attempt.

As a Bishop, I cannot condone this book's message in any way. In fact, it's just as well it's an electric book as I would be morally unable to even wipe my arse on a paper copy.

Mind you, it's dead funny like. And if used in the spirit of a "Lonely Planet" travel guide, it provides a fairly accurate overview of life on the Black Isle.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Guaranteed to make you laugh out loud! 8 Sept. 2013
By Panda
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
If you like to go on laugh-out-loud journeys where only the unexpected is guaranteed to happen then buy a copy of this book and let it take you on an intriguing, entertaining and slightly weird journey with the mischievous and imaginative Findo Gask!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious read
Very funny, with many memories of teenage life stirred up by the awkward star of the story. Enjoyed greatly and laughed a lot.
Published 2 months ago by purplemum
5.0 out of 5 stars super funny read
I just loved this book. I live on the Black Isle and it was just soooo right. Fun all the way
Published 17 months ago by Linda Morton
4.0 out of 5 stars Superb!
A great read that kept me amused from start to finish. Some great observations and I have and will continue to recommend this book to friends and family. Read more
Published 18 months ago by Alistair Rennie
4.0 out of 5 stars shite!!!!
Come on can ye no do the black-isle better justice than this?! You have just written a heap of disconnected pish! Read more
Published 18 months ago by K
3.0 out of 5 stars Not what I expected
This book was recommended by a friend who bought it. She encouraged me to buy this as, to her, it was very funny and an interesting read. On her recommendation I bought this. Read more
Published 20 months ago by Daisy
5.0 out of 5 stars funny, in a local sort of way
Good when you can picture the places mentioned.
Worth a couple of quid as an ebook
Easy reading, and almost believable
Published 20 months ago by Invernessguy
2.0 out of 5 stars Findo Gask
interesting ending, made up for the rest of the narrative, don't think it will set the literary world on fire, an amusing read.
Published 20 months ago by Black Isle
5.0 out of 5 stars Cracking read
Loved this book although it is not for the easily offended. It is cleverly written with laugh out loud humour. Great characters and you just have to love Findos' honesty. Read more
Published 21 months ago by jhg
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