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Product Description
Amazon.co.uk Review
Susan Jeffers, author of the hugely successful Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway and other self-help bibles, brings her attention to bear on children and motherhood. The stereotype that an unhappy adult is created by a bad mother is a fundamentally damaging misconception about just how much responsibility a mother should take for the happiness and success of her offspring, when grown.
Why not fathers? Why assume that adults cannot take responsibility for their own actions? Who says that people are entirely the product of their parenting and not their genetic make-up, or what the author calls their "sphere of being"; that is, the larger circle of their life, such as friends, teachers, media and so forth? Answer? So-called experts, who have no real evidence on which to base their assertions.
Jeffers' book is assertive and aggressive in tone, but then she is setting out to rattle the cage of a belief that has pervaded attitudes parenting since the Victorian age. It is possible to love your children and not love parenthood. Don't have children if you don't want to--it's a valid choice. Why should the mother always, seemingly automatically, get custody after a divorce?
This is a truly refreshing read for mothers--and indeed fathers--who want to hear a new and distinctive voice on these questions, among those that drone the same old repressive paradigms. --Alison Jardine
Review
"* 'BRILLIANT! A brave and revolutionary book that dares to confront many of our long-cherished beliefs about parenthood and parenting' - Susan Forward, author of EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL * 'At last, totally guilt-free parenting! If only I'd had this book sixteen years ago when I started out' - Jenni Murray * 'There is a terrific ring of truth about this book. Encouraging for parents and non-parents alike, it throws a clear spotlight onto what it really means to have a child' - Hester Lacey, Independent on Sunday * 'The self-help guru Susan Jeffers may be on the verge of achieving the impossible: that of winning the admiration of parents far and wide with a seriously politically incorrect book about children' - Serena Alcott, Telegraph * PRAISE FOR SUSAN JEFFERS' PREVIOUS BOOKS - * 'Susan Jeffers' books are always fun to read, and she has done it again with EMBRACING UNCERTAINTY. She leads the reader through the art of enjoying life in her own unique style!' - Louise L. Hay, Author of YOU CAN HEAL YOUR LIFE an * 'Now more than ever, Susan Jeffers' wisdom feels like a precious gift. Her counsel is profound and meaningful in such challenging times.' - Marianne Williamson"
--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
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Customer Reviews
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
10 of 10 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
Save yourselves a lot of agony, needles, drugs, emotional pain and money. Having been through the Infertility War ourselves, with no success, we are now trying to come to terms with living without children.
This book is great reading for anybody in this space as it is the only book I have seen that gives lots of positives reasons not to have kids. The overwhelming images in society are of the the happy and fulfilled mother. After reading this book you would think it was all just a conspiracy of our DNA!
This is the first book I have read that says that parenthood may not be, all it is cracked up to be. This book cheered me up no end and made me realise our situation may have some positives that I can learn to appreciate.
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
If you are finding accepting the life change that is becoming a parent difficult then this book is a must. Refreshingly honest, it pulls no punches but makes you feel you are not alone. Becoming a parent can be an incredibly physically and emotionally draining experience. The last thing you need is to feel guilty if you are finding things hard-going. This is the perfect antidote. I cannot recommend it enough.
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
As a first time mother of 10mth old twins, I can empathise with the vivid descriptions of the day to day physical and emotional slog of raising children. Initially (and rather depressingly) the negative emphasis struck me as dominating Jeffers' thoughts on the subject. However, as I persevered it became obvious that the whole picture of motherhood was being painted, and with humorous passages that made me laugh out loud. I particularly thank Ms. Jeffers for her thoughts on breast feeding, at last someone with a sensible attitude to the issue, that I want to tell every new mother about! Exploding the myths of motherhood she certainly does, and I feel this book should be a compulsory text for teenage children when being educated (are they?) about the decision to have children later in life (I intend to give this book to my children as soon as they hit puberty...). It is perhaps of more use to those still considering parenthood, but it does provide support to parents and 'free us from the guilt' that we do perpetually seem to torture ourselves with.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Not her best!
I'm usually a huge fan of Susan Jeffers, but found this one a less inspiring read than her best sellers "Feel the Fear" etc. Read more
Published on 10 May 2010 by White Knight
Blame the children... and get out of jail free!
Jeffers suffers here from Bad Guru Syndrome - i.e. she wrote one good book Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway: How to Turn Your Fear and Indecision into Confidence and Action and on... Read more
Published on 2 Oct 2009 by Chancery Stone
positive and life affirming???
I condsider myself to be a Susan Jeffers fan, so I was pretty surprised by this book.
I'm a parent of two small children myself, so I get that parenting is a very very tough... Read more
I'm a parent of two small children myself, so I get that parenting is a very very tough... Read more
Published on 17 Jun 2009 by Natalie Hansen
An enormously helpful read for the involuntarily childless
It's no exaggeration to say this book changed my life. It has helped me come to terms with my infertility in a way that nothing else I've read has done. Read more
Published on 18 May 2008 by J. Glass
Dont buy this if you are a new parent
One of the most negative books I've ever read, a thoroughly miserable read. Jeffers rams home her point by continually quoting people throughout the book on how miserable they... Read more
Published on 27 Mar 2008 by Mr. Ce Southern
Resonates when you are struggling
Okay, I agree there are times when Jeffers seems a little extreme in her views but this was the first time I found a voice for lots of little guilty thoughts I had. Read more
Published on 20 Feb 2008 by J. L. OREILLY
Fairly good antidote to the "Blame parents for everything" culture
If you are looking for a humorous antidote to the current culture of blaming parents for everything that's wrong with the universe and something to damp down the huge complex of... Read more
Published on 22 Dec 2007 by Marshall Lord
An Excellent Book
I have an LBP gene (you'll understand if you read the book!). However, I like this book as it is parenting without the sugar coating and presents a real view of many people's... Read more
Published on 5 Oct 2007 by Scooby Doo
I'm okay you're a brat
This book is very good, you can now be safe in the knowledge you are not the only one out there sceaming and pulling your hair out; which in its self is reasuring!! Read more
Published on 19 Aug 2003 by kim krokoksz
Finally, the truth!
This is the first book I have ever read that actually goes into detail about the negative side of parenting. Read more
Published on 2 May 2000
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