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I'm Not Really Here [Hardcover]

Paul Lake
4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (78 customer reviews)
RRP: £14.99
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Book Description

4 Aug 2011

Paul Lake was Manchester born, a City fan from birth. His footballing talent was spotted at a young age and, in 1983, he signed coveted schoolboy forms for City. Only a short time later he was handed the team captaincy.

An international career soon beckoned and, after turning out for the England under-21 and B teams, he received a call-up to the England training camp for Italia '90. Despite missing out on a place in the final squad he suitably impressed the management, with Bobby Robson earmarking him as an England captain in the making. As a rising star Paul became a target for top clubs like Manchester United, Arsenal, Spurs and Liverpool, but he always stayed loyal to his beloved club, deeming Maine Road the spiritual home at which his destiny lay.

But then, in September 1990, disaster struck. Paul ruptured his cruciate ligament and sustained the worst possible injury that a footballer can suffer. And so began his nightmare.

Neglected, ignored and misunderstood by his club after a succession of failed operations, Paul's career began to fall apart. Watching from the sidelines as similarly injured players regained their fitness, he spiralled into a prolonged bout of severe depression. With an enforced retirement from the game he adored, the death of his father and the collapse of his marriage, Paul was left a broken man.

Set against a turning point in English football, I'm Not Really Here is the powerful story of love and loss and the cruel, irreparable damage of injury; of determination, spirit and resilience and of unfulfilled potential and broken dreams.


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Product details

  • Hardcover: 416 pages
  • Publisher: Century (4 Aug 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1846058244
  • ISBN-13: 978-1846058240
  • Product Dimensions: 14.4 x 3.7 x 22.2 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (78 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 72,346 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Review

"Paul Lake could have been a world superstar but will forever be a legend at the club he loves" (Steve McManaman )

"Paul Lake was the most gifted in the group of young players who brightened Manchester City up for fans in the 1980s who were pining for the glory days to return...his is an inspirational human story" (David Conn The Guardian )

"I'd be frightened to put a price on his head these days ... Paul was as good a young player as I've ever worked with." (Howard Kendall )

"Without question, he is the best young player I have ever worked with" (Mel Machin )

"You would class Paul in the top bracket. I always likened him to Colin Bell - he had that great ability to get up and down the park." (Tony Book )

Book Description

The extraordinary memoir of Paul Lake, the greatest English footballer to never make the national team.

Inside This Book (Learn More)
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Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Index | Back Cover
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
48 of 48 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover
Although Paul Lake's City career effectively ended at the age of 22, he is still revered as a City legend. Why?

Firstly, during his short career at City (truncated by a horrific knee inury) he had already proven to be a star. Captain at 21, often MOTM...he simply didn't do bad performances. He could play almost anywhere - and had all the attributes necessary to make it at the top level. England captain of the future? You can never say for sure, but the consensus was almost unanimous.
Secondly, he was a blue through and through - a fan wearing the shirt. You could see how much he wanted to play, and as fans we saw ourself in him.
Thirdly, he was something to cling onto when things started to turn sour in the early 90s. "It'll be ok when we get Lakey back", was something I heard often at Maine Road.

This book is a frank and thorough depiction of the nature of depression when something you love is taken from you. It's something most people can relate to, athlete or mere mortal. The fact that Lake is so up front about a subject that is still almost taboo can only be a good thing for mental health awareness too.
I really enjoyed the book: it was well written and produced both smiles and tears. It's a refreshing work, not the same old same old football biog.

Thanks for the memories Paul, and I wish you all the best for the future.
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28 of 28 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I wish all autobiographies were like this 12 Aug 2011
By Shempz
Format:Hardcover
I'm not a Man City fan, and can't profess to knowing a huge amout about Paul Lake, in spite of being a big football fan all my life. This book however, is possibly the best autobiography I've ever read. It traces Paul's life from childhood to the success of being made Man City captain and part of the England World Cup Squad in 1990 to the lows of severe depression following long term injury and many botched operations.

It'll make you laugh, and cry (or at least get a lump in your throat!) in equal measures, and every page you read will just make you want to get to the next even faster.
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21 of 21 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I'm not really here 12 Aug 2011
Format:Hardcover
Growing up as a city fans from Denton, Paul lake was our inspiration and local hero. Everyone I knew was so upset when Lakey had to retire due to injury at such a young age. I was 16 then and now I am a thirty something and thought I would buy the book to see just what did happen to my hero.
What a read !!!! The first 2 chapters set the tone for an emotional read. It progresses to give you an true account of how badly certain people at the club treated their brightest star. The physical pain of an injury that was never going to get better due to being badly diagnoised by people a young Paul Lake trusted. The years of physical and emotional pain clearly come through the words on each page,but there are also some light hearted funny moments that make you laugh out loud. The Final chapter sees Paul "returning Home" back to City in his new role as club ambassador, Well done the club for not forgetting the best young homegrown footballer ever to play for City. Writing this book must of taken a lot of courage and soul searching but you get the sense that writing this book has probalbly helped Paul in his recovery. A must read for any football fan especially fans who like to read books written by players who are still in touch with reality. Well done Paul and Good Luck... (your still my hero :)
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars GREAT READ
SIGN OF A GOOD BOOK IS THAT YOU ARE DISAPPOINTED WHEN IT ENDS AS WITH THIS READ. YOU REALLY FEEL YOU ARE WITH PAUL ON HIS JOURNEY OF STARDOM, BUT BATTLING SADLY HIS PHYSICAL AND... Read more
Published 23 hours ago by In Dickov we trust
4.0 out of 5 stars I'm not really here
I bumped into Paul Lake and Tony Book recently in Manchester it was a thrill to shake there hands and have a few words. Read more
Published 13 days ago by Stevef
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Story
Great story. Every up and coming footballer should read this. No matter which team you are supporting, this a must-read.
Published 1 month ago by Erlend Ellingsen
5.0 out of 5 stars Great footballers autobiography
Compelling reading A real insight into a footballer's life before really big money came into the game. As the title infers Paul also covers life after football.
Published 1 month ago by Lord Nelson
5.0 out of 5 stars Fantasic read
I'm not a Man City fan, but recall seeing Paul Lake playing and recall what an outstanding prospect he was. Read more
Published 2 months ago by MR J ETHERINGTON
5.0 out of 5 stars Great read!!
This era was my introduction to Manchester City & it has been great reading the book & thinking back to when my love affair with this great club started. Read more
Published 2 months ago by mr c p kenny
5.0 out of 5 stars Really good!
A true and honest book. Paul covers everything from growing up in Denton to coping with his demons. As a local lad I can relate to many parts of this book. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Jimbo
5.0 out of 5 stars book
a really good read, even for non-football lovers - an inspirational story and spoken with frankness and easy to read
Published 2 months ago by Myh
5.0 out of 5 stars EXCELLENT
Im not the biggest reader but as a city fan this was a great read from start to finish
highly recommended
Published 2 months ago by GRAHAM ANDREW
5.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant read
A truly inspiring, brilliant read. If you love sport or not this is a really inspiring and heart warming book, even more so if you have bad knees.
Published 3 months ago by Steve
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