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Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships (Nonviolent Communication Guides)

Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships (Nonviolent Communication Guides) [Kindle Edition]

Marshall B. Rosenberg , Arun Gandhi
4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (62 customer reviews)

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Product Description


"A powerful tool for peace and partnership...shows us how to listen empathically and...communicate our authentic feelings and needs." --Riane Eisler, author, "The Chalice and the Blade", "Tomorrow's Children", and "The Power of Partnership"

Product Description

An enlightening look at how peaceful communication can create compassionate connections with family, friends, and other acquaintances, this book uses stories, examples, and sample dialogues to provide solutions to communication problems both at home and in the workplace. Guidance is provided on identifying and articulating feelings and needs, expressing anger fully, and exploring the power of empathy in order to speak honestly without creating hostility, break patterns of thinking that lead to anger and depression, and communicate compassionately. Practical nonviolent communication skills are partnered with a powerful consciousness and vocabulary that can be applied to personal, professional, and political differences. Included in the new edition is information on how to compassionately connect with oneself.
Do you hunger for skills to improve the quality of your relationships, to deepen your sense of personal empowerment or to simply communicate more effectively? Unfortunately, for centuries our culture has taught us to think and speak in ways that can actually perpetuate conflict, internal pain and even violence. Nonviolent Communication partners practical skills with a powerful consciousness and vocabulary to help you get what you want peacefully.

In this internationally acclaimed text, Marshall Rosenberg offers insightful stories, anecdotes, practical exercises and role-plays that will dramatically change your approach to communication for the better. Discover how the language you use can strengthen your relationships, build trust, prevent conflicts and heal pain. Revolutionary, yet simple, NVC offers you the most effective tools to reduce violence and create peace in your life—one interaction at a time.

Over 150,000 copies sold and now available in 20 languages around the world. More than 250,000 people each year from all walks of life are learning these life-changing skills.

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 1694 KB
  • Print Length: 222 pages
  • Publisher: Puddledancer Press; 2 edition (1 Sep 2003)
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B0019O6IWU
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (62 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #24,331 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
104 of 105 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Not Easy But It Works 13 May 2004
If you decide to go on a course to learn nonviolent communication, you are asked to read this book before going on the course - generally a two day foundation course. The request is a clue to the practical nature of this book which is the bible of the nonviolent communication community. Marshall Rosenberg writes simply and plainly and with a very human voice of day to day preoccupations - good relations with children, lovers and parents. It seems simple on first reading but when you begin to try and apply the lessons by yourself or on a course, you begin to understand that while Marshall's promise is improvement and better relations, this does not arrive instantly but with effort and concentration. He is not a prophet promising instant solutions and salvations. Each chapter in the book repays reading and re-reading. The book plays an essential role in an understanding of both the necessity of better communication and of its possibility. Marshall's phrase for the goal we need is 'compassionate connection' - communication with purpose for closer and non-judgemental relationships.
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55 of 56 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Deep and challenging 22 Aug 2007
By Stig
Have to admit that for me the book is anything but shallow; however I agree with the comment that it takes a lot of time getting to understand and practice the principles of NVC properly - for me about a year and a half of (hard) on - (switched) off effort. This is because, to truly communicate well we have to at first know our own feelings fully, and in a society and time when we are used to doing the opposite means that this takes really hard work. In addition, because of the society pressures, we are rarely supported in those efforts so it can seem like doubly hard work. I can only imagine the reviewers who have spoken of their irritation that the author seems to lack 'passion' and seems nicey-nicey is that, as a society, we have become so used to raised voices, aggressive gestures, and a childish taking our frustration out on others with few boundaries as a way of expressing 'passion' and 'feeling' that we have become inured to any other way of communicating more effectively, concerned that it might be equal to 'stuffing our own feelings down' in order to facilitate communication. This is not what NVC is about. What NVC offers an equally if not arguably more passionate and a really much more honest sharing of feelings but through gentle emotional sharing, rather than insults, jealous outbursts and language.

This is the essence of vulnerabilty, which is the essence of what NVC requires and that may well be an uncomfortable revelation for many (this certainly includes me). I speak as one who was/is neither calm nor lacking in passion, quite the opposite - but my method of communication was causing me pain (as well as to preclude genuine relationships and sharing).
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14 of 14 people found the following review helpful
Once you experience NVC, you'll never want to go back to communicating in a way that doesn't involve expressing and hearing needs - it becomes an example of Flow or a heightened state of consciousness. I have experienced profound joy from connecting with another person using NVC. That doesn't mean to say that learning NVC is easy; it isn't. NVC can stir-up all kinds of emotions that many people keep suppressed - the benefit is that you become more alive, more in touch with what is important to you, from doing so. To answer an earlier review, people who know NVC express the whole gamut of emotions - they're not 'nice, dead people'.

Learn the principles of NVC with somebody else - your parter or a close friend, if possible. Although supporters of NVC will tell you that to communicate compassionately, you only need one person (you), I have found myself giving empathy to someone else, whilst craving empathy myself, because I have struggled to get it from other people. It can be very isolating if you're the only person you know who is learning this whole new style of communication - if you learn it with someone else, you can share the learning and support each other.
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52 of 54 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars works for me 2 Mar 2006
Of all the books I've read, this is the one I'd say has been most useful to me.
I was intrigued by it's use in war-torn countries - rouanda, somalia, palastine and 'serious' situations like gang wars, prisons and violent encounters: so I thought I might learn something. I really enjoyed the book - it was like getting a flash of insight into a simpler underlying reality that makes a lot of sense to me. The process seems simple, almost trivial (like much deep insight can be) then you try it out and it's frustratingly artificial and hard work. You persist and find it gets easier, more natural. Then it gets harder, and so on. Overall, my experience of working with the book is that it's really valuable in finding ways of working in situations I'd have found too challenging previously. And a lot of hope that it's possible through practice to really deepen the quality of communication, and relation, with people. When we can do that, as he says, the other problems solve themselves. Thats been my experience.
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11 of 11 people found the following review helpful
The entire premise of the book is about playing nice in the sandbox. It is unfortunate that we as human beings seem to forget that simple rule that we learned when we were very young...but we do.

Marshall Rosenberg explains in the introduction that he has two questions that have motivated him to find the answers to: He asks: "What happens to disconnect us from our compassionate nature, leading us to behave violently and exploitatively? And conversely, what allows some people to stay connected to their compassionate nature under even the most trying circumstances?"

These questions are truly profound and Rosenberg does an exceptional job of answering both of them in his book.

Rosenberg notes that the first component of Nonviolent Communication is to observe without evaluating. In other words, apply empathy when communicating. This is easier said than done and takes time, patience and a willingness to change ones behavior. There will be mistakes along the way, but change does come with the right attitude.

The second component is to express our feelings. It encourages conscious responses bases on awareness of what we are perceiving, feeling and wanting rather than being habitual and auto responding without thinking. In other words, Rosenberg recommends critically thinking through what to say before saying it. Words are weapons and they need to be handled skillfully or they will be harmful!

There are many insightful comments throughout the book. For example, Rosenberg says: "It is the rare human being who can maintain focus on our needs when we are expressing them through images of their wrongness."

This book and other excellent books on communication help us understand each others needs better.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Very accessible and helpful
Published 4 days ago by BW
5.0 out of 5 stars A life changing book.
A life changing book. Great theory, great man.
Published 12 days ago by davidthefoal
5.0 out of 5 stars Too late for me, I hope you discover this book in time...
I discovered this book to late to rescue my marriage. Marshall Rosenberg was recommended as reading, (you can listen to him relatively easily on You Tube as a taster). Read more
Published 1 month ago by Robert A. Carter
4.0 out of 5 stars Four Stars
Interesting book.
Published 1 month ago by Rai
5.0 out of 5 stars life changing if you are open minded
wonderful book that has made me a more conscious communicator
Published 1 month ago by BusyMum
5.0 out of 5 stars Easy reading, thought provoking- I have a lot to ...
Easy reading,thought provoking- I have a lot to learn about this type of communication. Recommend you read it
Published 2 months ago by Elsiebeth
3.0 out of 5 stars 'Nonviolent Communication'
This book is a continuation of Marshall's first book on nonviolent communication.

I found the first book - enlightening - and very interesting. Read more
Published 2 months ago by M. A. Bart
5.0 out of 5 stars Compassionate communication
If you want to improve your ability to communicate with compassion, to understand your fellow Human Beings in a more Holistic way, this is a system that delivers excellent... Read more
Published 2 months ago by A. G. De Almeida
5.0 out of 5 stars Such an inspiration -
This book is brilliantly and gently written. MR understands how it takes along time to change our judgmental way of thinking, our conditioning- he gives us so much encouragement... Read more
Published 3 months ago by searcher
5.0 out of 5 stars This really is the most useful book you will ever read!
Marshall Rosenberg provides the language we all need to make better connections and to have more fulfilling and satisfying relations with our fellow human beings. A revelation.
Published 3 months ago by MR S AYLING
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Popular Highlights

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Four components of NVC: 1.observations 2.feelings 3.needs 4.requests &quote;
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Analyses of others are actually expressions of our own needs and values. &quote;
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We are dangerous when we are not conscious of our responsibility for how we behave, think, and feel. &quote;
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