What's not to like about a book by Carl Hiaasen? His prose is tough yet tender, his satire bites then provokes smiles, he's totally original, his offbeat characters are over the top, and, thanks to him, the State of Florida is revealed in all its steamy, seamy splendor. He won me with "Skinny Dip" and I haven't looked back since.
With "Nature Girl" we meet Boyd Shreave who is employed by Relentless, Inc. where he makes his living as a telemarketer. His mistress, Eugenie Fonda "who claimed a murky connection to the famous acting family" is in the cubicle next to him, a script is in front of him, and he has an assumed name for calling purposes - Boyd Eisenhower. He'll rue the day that he ever dialed Honey Santana's number.
Honey is a woman on a mission fueled by a rabid desire to rid the world of many adversities that have visited her, one of them being dinnertime sales calls. Her 12-year-old son, Fry, alternates between believing her to be tetched or the most wonderful Mom in the world. Her brother, Richard, is well aware that his sister "sometimes reacted to ordinary situations in unique ways." Nonetheless, he locates Boyd for her. Her plan? To sell him something he can't afford.
Sure enough, Boyd takes the bait and soon Honey is escorting the telemarketer and his reluctant mistress on a kayak tour through the wilds of Ten Thousand Islands. She just intends to teach them a lesson or three. What she hadn't counted on is Piejack, her boss at the fish market, following her. Piejack is the kind of guy who thinks sexual harassment in the workplace is acceptable, and the object of his attention is Honey.
Now, read carefully (this is Hiaasen) - Piejack is being followed by Honey's ex, Perry, and Fry. Dismal Key is a landing place for this parade, and it's there they find Sammy Tigertail, a half-white, half-Seminole former alligator wrestler who tried his hand at doing airboat tours. But, when his first customer died on board, he told his uncle "he wasn't spiritually equipped to deal with tourists." Precisely what he is equipped for is subject for conjecture.
Hiaasen's cast of crazy characters garner laughs aplenty. His meandering plot is a playful perplexity, and every page is a reminder that this author has no peers. Long may he scribe!
- Gail Cooke