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Natural Harvest: A collection of semen-based recipes [Paperback]

Paul "Fotie" Photenhauer
3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (29 customer reviews)
RRP: 15.99
Price: 12.10 & FREE Delivery in the UK. Details
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Book Description

17 Nov 2008
Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that. Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be surprised to learn how wonderful semen is in the kitchen. Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist. If you are a passionate cook and are not afraid to experiment with new ingredients - you will love this cook book!

Frequently Bought Together

Natural Harvest: A collection of semen-based recipes + Semenology - The Semen Bartender's Handbook + Cookin' With Coolio
Price For All Three: 33.65

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Product details

  • Paperback: 62 pages
  • Publisher: CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform; 3 edition (17 Nov 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1481227041
  • ISBN-13: 978-1481227049
  • Product Dimensions: 21.3 x 21.1 x 0.3 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (29 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 35,218 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Product Description

About the Author

Fotie is a passionate cook who loves to experiment with new exciting ingredients in the kitchen. This is his first cook book.

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
93 of 112 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Spunkulicious I think NOT! 14 Jan 2013
Format:Paperback
DO NOT buy this recipe book whatever you do! I made the unfortunate MISTAKE of buying it to make Christmas dinner a little more interesting for the family this year. I earnestly followed the recipes and was very excited to offer the star recipe `Spunkulicious Pie' to the in-laws as a special treat. All of the men in my immediate family contributed to it. Even Granddad! We didn't even know he had it in him. The shared solidarity of a collective experience made it seem even more special. It had that delicate smell of ball sack aroma when it came out of the oven just like the book said BUT! A few hours later everybody became violently ill. The book says you can reheat the pie but now I read somewhere else that this is disastrous because the heat mutates the semen. We all spent Christmas day at the NHS walk in centre and were diagnosed with the rare illness known as CONSPUNCTIVITIS. It ruined our whole Christmas and I want my money back!!!!
I gave it 2 stars because it smelt nice and the men felt happy at first.
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47 of 60 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars A bit crusty 2 Feb 2013
Format:Paperback
To save money, I purchased a second hand copy of this book, unfortunately some of the pages were stuck together!
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10 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Buy! 24 Jan 2014
By DanWave
Format:Paperback
Baked a cake for the children at school. They loved it!! Will definitely be serving this for desert at lunch time from now on!!
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45 of 60 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Some interesting new ideas 6 Feb 2013
Format:Paperback
I tend to be very 'experimental' in the kitchen, so a couple of my friends suggested that this book would provide me with some inspiration.
I am now glad that they made the recommendation.
As with any radical cookbook, I was a little bit cautious when I first started trying out the recipes. I never follow recipes to the letter, preferring to add a 'bit of myself' to the instructions. With this book I was able to do just that.
I have now replaced salt, in pretty much all my cooking, with semen. It has a certain sweet, sugary quality that I cannot find in other ingredients.
In some of my 'blind studies' I have had comments such as:
"I usually find saltfish far too salty, but the saltfish you cooked last night was just how I like it."
and
"You have always told me about Roman-style custard, but I will always add salt to my custard from now on."

I thank the author for waking me up to some new ideas.
However, I have only awarded it 4 stars because the book didn't stress enough about how much time I would have to spend in the 'kitchen'. The author should also have mentioned that my cock would be constantly sore.

It's still worth it though.
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Cum dine with me! 15 Mar 2014
Format:Paperback
At least you can assure your guests that everything has been whipped up by your own fair hands.

I'll get my coat.
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26 of 36 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars URGH! 22 Aug 2013
Format:Paperback
I'm giving it such a low rating because none of my children liked anything I cooked from this book. Their father sweated over the stove for ages and they all just spat it out. I put some red sauce on it for them, but they turned their noses up at that. I'd made that myself too.
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5.0 out of 5 stars self explanatory 25 July 2014
By dk
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
Interesting book.. Not one I'd leave lying around when family come over.. No pun intended
Buy it, and see for yourself..
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9 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Just coming 16 May 2013
Format:Paperback
I bought this book for a friend who needed a hand in the kitchen. The recipes are fantastic even if they do take a while to produce. This has changed my cooking forever and would recommend this book to anyone. "Is pudding ready dear? just coming!"
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
3.0 out of 5 stars What It Says on the Tin
I thought I would have a laugh at a mate's expense. He brought his missus round for a meal and I gave them the natural yoghurt recipe from the book. Read more
Published 5 months ago by Paratus
4.0 out of 5 stars Special Buffet
A friend of mine over here in the Isle of Man (I'll call him "Jack" to hide his identity) has been feeding another friend (let's call him "Rob" so as not to... Read more
Published 5 months ago by Andrew Cardwell
5.0 out of 5 stars Jizzy
Bought for a friend for christmas, he's yet to admit to cooking or even harvesting for the recipes but I certainly look forward to hearing about his girlfriends next dinner date!
Published 5 months ago by H. Holmes
2.0 out of 5 stars There's something fishy about this.
It may be just me but every recipe tasted like caviar. I also may need to widen my circle of avante garde epicures in the hope of gaining donors, as saving up for the blancmange... Read more
Published 6 months ago by Squyre
5.0 out of 5 stars This book is a jizz
This book is a real jizz. It certainly takes a lot of spunk to serve up these recipes, but after tasting just one, you can be sure your guests will just keep cumming. Read more
Published 7 months ago by David Wallis
3.0 out of 5 stars Loved it but expensive!
Although there are lots of funny reviews on here, I couldn't find a review that told me the quality of the book, so I bought it blind and hoped for the best. Read more
Published 8 months ago by Bessie
5.0 out of 5 stars Fantastically funny
Great quality book, well packaged
Quick shipping

Don't think I can take it seriously as a book
Great gag gift
You won't want to eat at the house of the... Read more
Published 9 months ago by N. Wills
5.0 out of 5 stars A great cockbook
I have to say when I got this as a bat mitzvah present I was very surprised as I am not Jewish. I just had my mouth wide open when I saw it. Read more
Published 11 months ago by You Gotta Be Kiddin'
1.0 out of 5 stars Looks like a good book, but I was disappointed. It's like a pamphlet...
Looks like a good book, but I was disappointed. It's like a pamphlet from the tourist info centre... minature booklet.
Published 11 months ago by Devlin
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