Steven Gauge’s response to an impending midlife crisis didn’t involve piercings, tattoos or leather trousers – instead, he decided to take up rugby, and made a number of important discoveries. First, that in this ultimate contact sport, class divisions melt away in the presence of rugby's own eternal divide: the Forwards and the Backs. Secondly, though biting is generally frowned upon, it does occasionally take place and can be discouraged by applying Deep Heat to the ears. And fi nally, turning up on time with your kit is far more important than knowing what to do with the ball if it ever reaches you. By the end of his fi rst few seasons, Steven had cracked his nose and various other parts of his anatomy – but he had cracked the game too, and found a place in the club as Captain of the Fourths.
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'On an Iron John odyssey in search of his own Iron Johnny Wilkinson, Steven Gauge reveals the hidden depths of commuterland manhood with charm, wit and intelligence and real insight. Whether you're going through a midlife crisis yourself, or seeking understanding of the delicate male psyche and its need to bond in mud, My Life as a Hooker is the only guide you need.' (Samira Ahmed, journalist and broadcaster )
'Steven Gauge's writing debut is far more accomplished than his hilarious efforts on the pitch. Painfully honest and self-deprecating, this story will appeal to anyone who's ever tried their hand at something they weren't terribly good at but still enjoyed every step of the way. The characters in the clubhouse are the stars of every amateur team up and down the country and will be familiar to anyone who has ever put on a club shirt. You want to join the team as much as turn the page. If this is what a midlife crisis does for you, I want one.' (Luke Benedict, rugby writer for the Daily Mail )
'littered with blokish anecdotes.' (Sports Book of the Month )
'thankfully, Gauge has submitted [sic] his midlife experiences to paper and come up with an entertaining meander through rugby clubs, drinking and, of course, rugby tours.' (The Nottingham Evening Post )
'engaging tale… a breezy, often witty account of one man's desire to do something different and reject the notion that, just because you're getting on a bit, it doesn't mean you're quite ready for a Zimmer frame.' (The Nottingham Evening Post )
'an open account of one man's mid-life crisis and also a second chance at sport... A heart-warming read with just the right amount of educated cynicism.' (St Christopher's Live Your Life e-zine )
'contains lessons that reach beyond the gates of Warlingham Rugby Club car park… Its underlying philosophy [is] of self-help, communal activity, tolerance, respect and beer… Well-written, funny and warm hearted. It opens with a great joke and builds seamlessly from there… Steven builds an entire philosophy of life into his 230 page narrative.' (Liberal Democrat Voice )
'a ruck-load of laughs… one of those rarities in sports publishing: a humorous book which is genuinely funny… [Gauge] is able to recount in full, life in the casual nether reaches of British sport… made me laugh out loud.' (Sports Journalists' Association )
'a sports book that celebrates an unfit 40something novice player in the third worse team in Surrey… autobiographical traipse through a rough and tumble approach to a mid-life crisis.' (Inside Croydon )
' funny yet so true' (Rugby World )
'Steven Gauge's writing debut is far more accomplished than his hilarious efforts on the pitch. Painfully honest and self-deprecating, this story will appeal to anyone who's ever tried their hand at something they weren't terribly good at but still enjoyed every step of the way. The characters in the clubhouse are the stars of every amateur team up and down the country and will be familiar to anyone who has ever put on a club shirt. You want to join the team as much as turn the page. If this is what a midlife crisis does for you, I want one.' (Luke Benedict, rugby writer for the Daily Mail )
'littered with blokish anecdotes.' (Sports Book of the Month )
'thankfully, Gauge has submitted [sic] his midlife experiences to paper and come up with an entertaining meander through rugby clubs, drinking and, of course, rugby tours.' (The Nottingham Evening Post )
'engaging tale… a breezy, often witty account of one man's desire to do something different and reject the notion that, just because you're getting on a bit, it doesn't mean you're quite ready for a Zimmer frame.' (The Nottingham Evening Post )
'an open account of one man's mid-life crisis and also a second chance at sport... A heart-warming read with just the right amount of educated cynicism.' (St Christopher's Live Your Life e-zine )
'contains lessons that reach beyond the gates of Warlingham Rugby Club car park… Its underlying philosophy [is] of self-help, communal activity, tolerance, respect and beer… Well-written, funny and warm hearted. It opens with a great joke and builds seamlessly from there… Steven builds an entire philosophy of life into his 230 page narrative.' (Liberal Democrat Voice )
'a ruck-load of laughs… one of those rarities in sports publishing: a humorous book which is genuinely funny… [Gauge] is able to recount in full, life in the casual nether reaches of British sport… made me laugh out loud.' (Sports Journalists' Association )
'a sports book that celebrates an unfit 40something novice player in the third worse team in Surrey… autobiographical traipse through a rough and tumble approach to a mid-life crisis.' (Inside Croydon )
' funny yet so true' (Rugby World )
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
By Catherine
Format:Paperback
If laughter is the best medicine then this book should be available on the NHS. It is a joy: very funny, hugely likeable and tells a cracking good story. In a friendly, witty and engaging style, Steven Gauge takes us on a rollicking journey from his first days on the rugby pitch to his hard-won heyday as Captain of the Fourths. This is the Dad's Army of sports books. I found myself caring about this motley crew and willing them to hang in there and stop losing.
Describing himself as a hobbit, as he is short but determined, Gauge is totally honest about both triumphs and disasters. Gauge is a human cartoon: repeatedly flattened, he never gives up. He involves us by giving advice, too: `Once you are on the ground it is probably better to stay there for a little while...'
Unlike a cartoon, Gauge gets hurt. Yet like a hobbit, he is brave. Confused, but determined to help his team to win, or at least lose better, he decides to read books on sports psychology, after struggling to give a good half-time pep talk: `As I began to ramble, I realised I hadn't the faintest idea why we were losing...'
"If a thing is worth doing, it is worth doing badly," wrote G.K.Chesterton. This book is a timely reminder in a world obsessed with perfection and celebrity of what life-enhancing good times you can have doing something for fun. At the same time, how a hobbit shapes up as a rugby captain makes a great story. Watching him try hard to get better is hilarious and sometimes unexpectedly moving. And if you've ever had to recruit people for a team, the chapter on 'Captain's Poker' will strike you as inspired.
This book makes you want to turn off the tv and run around in the mud. Then again, sitting in a chair and laughing this much is a pretty good workout.
Describing himself as a hobbit, as he is short but determined, Gauge is totally honest about both triumphs and disasters. Gauge is a human cartoon: repeatedly flattened, he never gives up. He involves us by giving advice, too: `Once you are on the ground it is probably better to stay there for a little while...'
Unlike a cartoon, Gauge gets hurt. Yet like a hobbit, he is brave. Confused, but determined to help his team to win, or at least lose better, he decides to read books on sports psychology, after struggling to give a good half-time pep talk: `As I began to ramble, I realised I hadn't the faintest idea why we were losing...'
"If a thing is worth doing, it is worth doing badly," wrote G.K.Chesterton. This book is a timely reminder in a world obsessed with perfection and celebrity of what life-enhancing good times you can have doing something for fun. At the same time, how a hobbit shapes up as a rugby captain makes a great story. Watching him try hard to get better is hilarious and sometimes unexpectedly moving. And if you've ever had to recruit people for a team, the chapter on 'Captain's Poker' will strike you as inspired.
This book makes you want to turn off the tv and run around in the mud. Then again, sitting in a chair and laughing this much is a pretty good workout.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
By Francis G-S
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
Athough i have never played with Mr Gauge (in any sense), I am like him a Warlingham man through and through. not only has he captured the essence of that great club (home to the illustrious C Robshaw, K Traynor & Kay Wilson amongst others) but also our game in all it's wonderful facets. Well done, and thank you.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
By Nigel Pigdon
Format:Paperback
Highly entertaining and surprisingly accurate to my experiences. I also started playing Rugby again in my late 30s after stopping playing in my early 20s as I wanted my kids to learn the game and associated values rather than just football. I also went into the front row but as a prop. Almost all stories provided could very easier have come from my own small club in rural Warwickshire but we only have 2 teams rather than 4. Even the nick names for some of the players were the same. Last Saturday a very respectable in real life ex 2nd team captain had his last ever game now he's in his mid 50s. He also ended up in his pants (to "play" a game of Sumo outside in the rain) shortly before being picked up by his family to be taken out for a posh meal.
I would strongly recommend this easy read to anyone interested in the humour of grass root rugby beyond the professional teams.
I would strongly recommend this easy read to anyone interested in the humour of grass root rugby beyond the professional teams.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars
Keep calm and play rugby!
Be very careful where you read this book.......it had me laughing out loud at times as I followed the fortunes of Warlingham's Fourth XV.....! Read more
Published 2 months ago by Stephen Morris
4.0 out of 5 stars
Settle Down for a Good Read
This was both an interesting and entertaining read not only because it concentrates on the "other" end of the sporting pyramid but because it is written by a bloke who... Read more
Published 4 months ago by jf
5.0 out of 5 stars
Simply put, the best rugby humour book written to date
Every player across the country (and further afield, I am sure) has encountered the trials, tribulations and mild eccentricity of lower-level rugby, but few have the ability to... Read more
Published 4 months ago by RugbyTom
5.0 out of 5 stars
Brilliant fun
My wife bought me this book for my birthday as she describes me as a born again rugby fan. I think I laughed on every single page and I can't recommend this book highly enough.
Published 5 months ago by Richard
5.0 out of 5 stars
...for anybody that has ever played club rugby ...simply brilliant.
You'll recognise so much in this book that'll make you cry with laughter and make you re-realise why rugby can be the most special game in the world, with true friendships that... Read more
Published 6 months ago by Andy_F
5.0 out of 5 stars
One of the best rugby books of all time
An essentital read for anybody interested in rugby and having played hooker to a similar low standard of rugby this is a true reflection of what its like to play parks rugby and... Read more
Published 7 months ago by Mr. M. J. Davies
4.0 out of 5 stars
Captain's captain
My Life as a Hooker: When a Middle-Aged Bloke Discovered Rugby
What a thoughtful insight into the world of the amateur game of rugby, if you are new to the game. Read more
What a thoughtful insight into the world of the amateur game of rugby, if you are new to the game. Read more
Published 10 months ago by Ugo
5.0 out of 5 stars
Laugh out loud book
Despite being only connected to the game of rugby by proxy, I found Mr Gauge's book an absolutely hilarious read. Read more
Published 13 months ago by CiderSal
5.0 out of 5 stars
What rugby Is all about!
Super-sub........the pain.....the friendship......... The band of brothers...... Get involved with your local rugby club now what's stopping you? 50's? No problem!
Published 13 months ago by Mark
4.0 out of 5 stars
Like David Mitchell, except he's fatter and shorter. V funny. I've...
This author is rubbish... at rugby. But this book had me blurting out a good laugh every few pages (for me, that's well above my average). Read more
Published 14 months ago by Hari
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