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67 of 67 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
"I don't want to grow old!", 9 Dec 2004
One of the first things that struck me about "the Mother" was how disaffected, distant, and unemotional she is. In fact, her entire family seems to be so totally self-absorbed, self-obsessed and overly materialistic that not one character is at all likable. Rather than appearing as a shining beacon of love and support to her children, May (a marvelous Anne Reid), comes across as more concerned about her own failings. While ready to listen on the surface, deep down she's a middle-class, snobby, and somewhat uncaring mother who probably loves her children when it's convenient for her, but has spent the majority of her life resenting her children for stifling her when she was younger. The sexy affair she embarks on with her daughter's boyfriend, without regard for her daughter's feelings, says a lot about the years of pent-up repression inside of her. Astutely observing the intricacies and nuances of English domestic middle-class life, director Roger Michell, allows us to peek into the lives of the elderly May and Toots (Peter Vaughan) as they visit their grown children in London. They are a long-married and well-to-do couple. Bobby (Steven Mackintosh), their busy son has a glamorous life style, a thriving business, a new house, and a wife and two children. Paula (Cathryn Bradshaw), their daughter, is a single mother, a schoolteacher, and an unpublished writer. When Toots suddenly dies of a heart attack, May, in a fit of fear and loneliness, moves in with her children to escape the solitude of her house. Her arrival at Bobby's causes problems so May goes to stay with the busy Paula. Going back and forth from Paula's flat to Bobby's house, May meets Darren (a gorgeously sexy Daniel Craig), Bobby's robust, muscle-laden best friend who is doing some building work on the house. After Paula asks her mother to find out whether Darren wants to marry her, May becomes friendly with Darren. They have lunch together and there's obviously a connection because May kisses Darren. Soon their friendship becomes physical and with Darren sexually thrilling her, they begin an incredibly hot affair. May is a frumpy grandmother in her sixties, while Darren is a bearded, virile man in his thirties. All the characters in this film are absolutely mired in dysfunction. May is unhappy and alone, and she fears becoming old. Her children don't particularly like her, and Paula, especially, bitterly resents her; she thinks that May's been a lousy mother who never "encouraged" her. Paula is portrayed as neurotic, hysterical and cloying, and her obsession with Darren totally gets in the way of her ability to see that Darren is kind of useless and doesn't particularly love her. Darren is also haunted: he drinks too much, copes with an autistic son, and sleeps in his car. He's always poor and seeks solace from his problems in doing lines of coke. At first Darren is nice to May, and she offers to take him on as a type of sugar mother to him, but soon she begins to see his other side. The Mother is a beautifully acted movie with Daniel Craig and Anne Reid giving astoundingly realistic performances. The sex scenes between them both are totally realistic and beautifully done, the connection between them being far more than just sex. Reid is especially good at portraying a complicated, middle-aged woman, who is actively seeking her own fulfillment and rediscovering parts of herself that have lain dormant for years. Craig is also great as her young, spunky suitor easily portraying a good man who seems to be very kind and understanding until May, unrealistically tries to push their relationship. The Mother is a quiet, complex and very adult film that analyses, with a type of subtle restraint, the deleterious effects of selfishness, egocentricity, and self-interest on families. Mike Leonard December 04.
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