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Product Description
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• Does the man you love assume the right to control how you live and behave?
• Have you given up important activities or people to keep him happy?
• Is he extremely jealous and possessive?
• Does he switch from charm to anger without warning?
• Does he belittle your opinions, your feelings, or your accomplishments?
• Does he withdraw love, money, approval, or sex to punish you?
• Does he blame you for everything that goes wrong in the relationship?
• Do you find yourself “walking on eggs” and apologizing all the time?
If the questions here reveal a familiar pattern, you may be in love with a misogynist — a man who loves you, yet causes you tremendous pain because he acts as if he hates you.
In this superb self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward draws on case histories and the voices of men and women trapped in these negative relationships to help you understand your man’s destructive pattern and the part you play in it.
She shows how to break the pattern, heal the hurt, regain your self-respect, and either rebuild your relationship or find the courage to love a truly loving man.
It''s the Rodgers and Hammerstein way to fall in love. Read the first page
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Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt
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Customer Reviews
Get past the American case-history formula and this book will save your sanity and help you come out on the other side with a modicum of self-esteem.
I have learned some valuable, if not life-saving, lesssons from this book. I had a friend who was beaten by her now ex-husband and couldn't understand why she would tolerate such behaviour. It is a very complex issue, and when I read this book (along with many others - so I have a very rounded experience of such literature - and am not a man-hater), I began to realise that my parents were toxic and that my father's outlook on and approach to life and the legacy he left me, has damaged my self-esteem and consequent expectations of relationships.
I have questioned my values over and over again trying to understand why I was unhappy in my marriage, and now I finally understand why! The pattern of abuse was repeating itself through me! I am not to blame for whatever my husband decides to blame me for because he can't deal with - and so projects onto me - his emotional problems!
Fortunately, I have learned to cope, through changing my expectations of relationships and life in general. There is hope!! I am still with my husband. I am living consciously now and he is slightly 'inconvenienced' that I am happier now that I value myself more. However, respecting yourself is the only way to lead a happy, fulfilling life!!
I am glad I didn't leave my husband as I now know what was wrong with our relationship and how to deal with it, rather than going on to another abusive relationship whereby I repeat the same mistakes over and over again in a futile attempt to try to correct the past.
This subject does take a lot of research and understanding, and councelling is good.
Fortunately there is increasing awareness of this epidemic in society, and this book, along with "Toxic Parents", helps.
However this month after our relationship broke up up I re-read the book and am appalled to see that he fits the description in so many ways of a man who hates women . I also made many of the same mistakes that the women in this book made, trying to be a rescuer for him, to give him a solid foundation of love and friendship which would help him to overcome the disruptive childhood he had.
I was so surprised the first time that he shouted at me and called me stupid and a control freak that I didn't point out to him that this behaviour was unacceptable and I thereby opened the door for a growth of more and more unreasonable and controlling behaviour on his part.
We have now split up and I feel I have had a lucky escape.
This book was extremely good at pointing out the warning signs which I should have noticed and will certainly be on the lookout for in the future.
It answereed so many questions which had been around for years and provided an... Read more
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