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Men Can Do It: The Real Reason Dads Don't Do Childcare, and What Men and Women Should Do About It Paperback – 27 May 2013

13 customer reviews

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Product details

  • Paperback: 256 pages
  • Publisher: (27 May 2013)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0955369533
  • ISBN-13: 978-0955369537
  • Product Dimensions: 19.7 x 2 x 13.4 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 527,602 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Change your diet. Think positive and you'll live. Doctors aren't always right. Get some experimental treatment. Watch this YouTube video. Read this article. Visit this website. It's the chemo that'll kill you, not the cancer.
There's always a chance.

There's always hope.

There's no harm in trying...

When Gideon Burrows was diagnosed with an incurable brain tumour, he found himself in the cancer twilight zone: a place where hope and wellbeing are exalted, and where truth and rationality are sometimes optional extras.

It's a world where the dying are always bravely battling, survivors are venerated and where charities and wellness gurus are beyond criticism. It's a place of miracle diets, self-healing and positive thinking.

When there are so many contradicting opinions and so much background noise, how do you separate the sane from the sound? How do you make decisions that are wise rather than wishful thinking?

Gideon's latest book 'This book won't cure your cancer' challenges the very foundations of how we respond to the disease. It will make you angry, it may make you cry. It will make you feel hopeful and hopeless in equal measure.

Above all, though, it will make you think.

Gideon is also author of Men Can Do It: The real reason dads don't do childcare, which was awarded Self Published Book of the Year 2014.

His other books include Living Low Grade about living with a slow-growing brain tumour, Write for Charity, and a series of books on the arms trade, and a comedy travel guide among the UK chilli scene Chilli Britain.

Gideon worked as campaigns co-ordinator for Campaign Against Arms Trade before becoming a journalist writing on social justice, charities and public affairs. He was a staff journalist on Community Care magazine, then worked on various sector titles including Third Sector, Guardian Society, Social Enterprise and Municipal Journal.

Gideon founded in 1998 to provide editorial and copywriting services, and training on copywriting, marketing and media, for charities. quickly became the charity sector's leading editorial and writing training agency.

Gideon has trained hundreds of charities across the UK on every aspect of their communications work.

In May 2012, Gideon was diagnosed with an incurable, inoperable brain tumour, which he blogs about at Bicycles and Brain Tumours.

He lives by the sea in Northern Ireland, has two children, five bicycles and a comprehensive, though generally failing, vegetable patch.

Product Description


A highly entertaining plea for men to become great dads... An engaging manifesto: proof that dads can be capable and caring when it comes to babies --Oliver James, broadcaster, child psychologist and author of 'How Not to F*** Them Up' and 'Love Bombing'

Gideon Burrows perceptively and powerfully takes on the last taboo in childcare, challenging the very foundations of the contemporary debate about parenting. --Duncan Fisher OBE, co-founder of The Fatherhood Institute and

Witty and honest. A wake-up call for all new parents. --Hello! magazine

Men can do it and we need to talk about that more. A very timely book. --Fiona Millar, author of The Secret World of the Working Mother

About the Author

Gideon Burrows is a writer and involved father. He didn't realise other men didn't do an equal role in childcare, until it was too late to change. Just like his wife, he spends half the working week looking after their children. Gideon has written a number of books on charity communication and the arms trade. He has also worked as a freelance and staff journalist for The Guardian, Third Sector, Community Care, The New Statesman, New Start and Municipal Journal. He has written for hundreds of charities, working on their websites, newsletters, fundraising materials and annual reports.

Customer Reviews

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Andrea on 16 May 2013
Format: Paperback
Ok where to start about how brilliant this book is...
Firstly it is a witty entertaining read - just what tired parents need! It really is a page turner and I never thought I would say that about a book dealing with parenting...
It is based on solid research, blows up the idea of the growing trend of dads in aprons (I wondered where they all were - thought it was just Wales that was missing them) and has given us a whole new idea of how to do things that will make family life ... well better for all of us.
If only we had read this before (or in the earlier stages of) having children - rather than when they are 5, 11 and 13. But it is never too late and we are inspired!
Highly recommended..
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Gorga on 19 May 2013
Format: Paperback
I'm ashamed to write that, due to trying to juggle childcare for three young children and work part time, I haven't actually finished a book for years. This is the exception. The author has made this book an easy and entertaining read. His fluent writing style is accompanied by witty and honest confessions and his arguments are backed up by in depth research, adding further weight to the notion of fairer parenting. In fact, this book prompted a much needed discussion between my partner and I about how we might change our current arrangments for a better quality of life for our family. This included a bit of rebalancing all the way through to him taking a career break, with me returning to work full time. I would recommend this book to all parents to be, to prompt informed discussions before social stereotyping leads the way over rational decision making. I would also recommend it to all existing parents seeking a more harmonious and rewarding family life. The author clearly took the route to fairer parenting and makes it clear it's the best decision he and his wife made. Reading the Epilogue, this becomes even more poignant.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I've never written a review of anything on amazon before (and I've bought enough). But this book has given me so much food for thought - it is as much manual as manifesto - that I can't recommend it highly enough.

I was wondering why I read so much in newspapers etc about dads doing more hands on parenting/childcare these days - and yet most relationships I could see involved the mum being the main carer and the dad doing a bit at weekends. Why when most of my friends are fairly liberal and progressive in their views, when children came along, it all went quite 1950s - and why they all had individual explanations for why that was, adamant that they weren't sexist. Contradictory arguments ('it's because he's self employed/I'm self employed I have to look after the children while he works...' 'my job was much more secure/less secure, so it made sense for me to take a lot of time off or go part time...') - but all leading to the same scenario. Mum takes a huge step back in terms of work - often thinking it will be temporary, when it isn't - dad is put under pressure to earn more to compensate, works longer hours, becomes much less competent with the children than she is, and ultimately becomes more of a stranger to their own family.

This books shines a light on the sexist expectations and scenarios that come with parenthood - and how we are compicit with them, often without being aware of it. And certainly not meaning to be. It's a myth buster - and really radically assertive about the role dads can and should play. It's also an argument for a healthier, happier family life and the rewards that a close and caring relationship with your children can bring.

But dull and worthy it ain't. It's a very easy, entertaining read that's actually quite uplifting. You don't often get to say that about books involving sexual politics and parenting.
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Format: Kindle Edition
A brilliant, funny and well-written book that will make you challenge your own assumptions about gender roles in families.

I'm telling everyone to read it - great even if you don't yet have a family, and it might help you to rebalance things if you already do.

Gideon tracks through all the common reasons why couples don't equally share childcare and comes to the conclusion that it's because men don't want to. He also points out that this is pretty lame.

He also explains that 'equally shared' means doing a similar number of hours of hands-on childcare and paid work, not just taking the children to the swings on a Saturday whilst your partner spends the rest of the week keeping the house running and looking after little ones.

He then gives practical examples of how to make it work, based on his own experience of sharing childcare in his family, and also from his perspective as a business owner. He admits that childcare isn't always fun, which is refreshing.

The book is mainly talking about straight couples who live together, as parents with different family make ups (e.g. living apart, or same-sex couples) will have different challenges to face. The underlying message is relevant for anyone, however, as it demonstrates how everyone needs to pitch in to make equality a reality.

I wrote a full review here: [...] but if you aren't sure, it's worth it for the message in the epilogue alone.

Read it, get your friends to read it, and let's change the world.

And men - if you start putting these ideas into action, your attractiveness to women will increase tenfold ;)
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