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Mars and Venus: Starting Over
 
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Mars and Venus: Starting Over (Paperback)

by John Gray (Author)
4.7 out of 5 stars See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
RRP: £8.99
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Frequently Bought Together

Mars and Venus: Starting Over + Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus: How to Get What You Want in Your Relationships + Mars and Venus Together Forever: Practical Guide to Improving Communication and Relationship Skills
Price For All Three: £17.58

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Product details

  • Paperback: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Vermilion (9 Jul 1998)
  • Language English
  • ISBN-10: 0091816270
  • ISBN-13: 978-0091816278
  • Product Dimensions: 19.4 x 12.6 x 2.8 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.co.uk Sales Rank: 115,509 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Product Description

Amazon.co.uk Review
A breakup, divorce, or loss of a loved one isn't just the end of your relationship with that person. It's a continuation of every feeling of abandonment you've ever suffered. It's the loss of a system of approval you'd come to depend on. The struggle, as Gray points out in Starting Over, isn't just to find a new partner, but to get over those feelings of abandonment or loss or anger or whatever else gets dredged up by the end of a relationship.

Perhaps the book's most crucial chapter posits that the best way to get over the loss of love is to focus on the "love" more than the "loss." That may seem impossible, especially if the bum took off with your best friend, your life savings, and your Lyle Lovett CDs, but Gray didn't get to be a household name because the advice in his Venus and Mars books doesn't work. Remembering only the bad parts, Gray says, leaves you with an important part of your emotional being closed to new business.

As for the Venus and Mars stuff, that comes in the second half of the book, when Gray looks at how men and women start new relationships from different points of view, with different priorities (a man might want to have fun with no strings attached; a woman might carry with her a lengthy list of requirements for her next partner, a list that excludes virtually all available men).

If you've never read Gray's work before, you have to be prepared to check your cynicism at the door. This is earnest stuff, but it's also based on decades of experience counseling clients. He's not one of those photogenic, nine-times-divorced shrinklets who's telling you how to conduct your relationships without any real clue of what makes love last. This is the real package: nothing glib, nothing quick and easy, nothing you could've figured out from a "Love Is..." cartoon.

Product Description
Offers comfort and advice on how to overcome loss and gain the confidence to engage in new relationships. If you are newly single, this guide aims to help you move past the pain of being alone and to recognize when you're ready to start looking for another partner.


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Customer Reviews

13 Reviews
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 (12)
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Average Customer Review
4.7 out of 5 stars (13 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

 
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Helps you to move on, 13 April 2005
By A Customer
If you have suffered the end of a relationship by a break-up or bereavement and are finding it difficult to heal and move on with your life, this book is essential reading. Grieving the loss of love, letting go of hurt, saying goodbye with love, getting unstuck, man on the rebound, a woman's fear of intimacy and learning to be happy alone are just some of the chapters in this book and there is also an exercise to help you feel better and loads of information about the different challenges faced by men and women when they are starting over and looking for love again. John Gray writes in such an understanding way you feel as though he knows exactly how you are feeling. When you are ready, I would recommend Mars and Venus on a Date as it gives invaluable advice on dating and how to build a solid base for a healthy relationship by taking things slowly.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book for easing your confusion after a loss, 30 Jun 1999
By A Customer
Best thing about this book is the way that it makes you feel like you are not alone in your feelings. It explains why you feel the emotions that you do after losing someone that you really care about.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Practical advice when you have lost all practicality, 14 Jan 1999
By A Customer
This book helped me understand what males go through during a breakup and that understanding and insight helped me understand my pain. It is easy to understand and everything I was going through I read in each paragraph. Dr. Gray's years of counseling are apparent and the book assisted me in finding some semblance of organization when I felt I was in the middle of a hurricane. Thank you for helping me stay out of the cess pool of self-pity!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing Book!..
This book is really amazing, and very helpful for some one like me... I really love this book, its wonderful and fantastic...
Published on 30 April 2005 by fhei

5.0 out of 5 stars This book is simply the best book for surviving divorce!
John Gray's approach to this subject is quite stunning. He is very sincere and discloses alot about his own personal life and ,therefore,not only writes as a professional,but also... Read more
Published on 28 Feb 2002

5.0 out of 5 stars Very use ful and helpful
I have not read his other books but this came in very useful at a difficult time in my life. I think it is the simplicity of the style and the way in which he confronts problems... Read more
Published on 10 Jan 2002 by pethennno@hotmail.com

1.0 out of 5 stars More sexist blather
Another condescending book from John Gray, who seems sometimes to be stuck in the 1950's. With most women working outside of the home these days, he fails to address how a... Read more
Published on 22 Aug 1999

5.0 out of 5 stars Highly recommended for couples who have recently broken up
Thanks to Dr Gray for writing such a supportive and practical book for people, like myself, who have recently broken up. Read more
Published on 24 Feb 1999

5.0 out of 5 stars A silent best friend in hard times!
The book is wonderfully helpful in reaffirming the absolute normality of anger, depression, fear, and sorrow of a painful divorce, breakup, or loss. Read more
Published on 4 Jan 1999

5.0 out of 5 stars A very comforting book for going through difficult times.
Whether you are dealing with death, divorce or any kind of hurtful break-up, this book is for you. It has recently helped me to get back my life after a very painful... Read more
Published on 17 Sep 1998

5.0 out of 5 stars Men Hurt Too
The Mars/Venus guru reveals that it is normal for a male to express/show emotions or even "keep them inside. Read more
Published on 4 Aug 1998

5.0 out of 5 stars I think this is a great subject to write about.
Hi! I saw Mr. Gray talk on Oprah about his new book and I have to say that his comments on his new book as well as his other ones was not only enlightening but also very helpful.
Published on 10 Jul 1998

5.0 out of 5 stars A great help for those of us who find ourselves single again
This is a wonderful book for those of us who find ourselves suddenly single again after the break up of a long term relationship. Read more
Published on 7 Jul 1998

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