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Loving Yourself Loving Another: The Importance of Self-esteem for Successful Relationships (Relate Guides) [Paperback]

Julia Cole
3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
RRP: £7.99
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Book Description

4 Jan 2001 Relate Guides

This guide shows how self-esteem affects the quality of one's relationships. Relate counsellor Julia Cole suggests that low self-esteem -no matter whether due to one's character, upbringing or adult experiences - is one of the main reasons that people fail to have satisfying relationships. This book shows what makes people choose a particular partner, and includes advice on how to:

-manage a difficult relationship where one partner withdraws or suffers from depression or aggression

-identify what is a healthy relationship

-build strong 'couple esteem' for a healthy, long-lasting relationship

-and improve sex through exercises and advice


Frequently Bought Together

Loving Yourself Loving Another: The Importance of Self-esteem for Successful Relationships (Relate Guides) + Relate Guide To Staying Together: From Crisis to Deeper Commitment + Stop Arguing, Start Talking: The 10 Point Plan for Couples in Conflict (Relate)
Price For All Three: £19.37

Buy the selected items together


Product details

  • Paperback: 208 pages
  • Publisher: Vermilion (4 Jan 2001)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0091856760
  • ISBN-13: 978-0091856762
  • Product Dimensions: 12.6 x 20 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 38,798 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Julia Cole is a BACP Senior Accredited and Registered counsellor and psychosexual therapist. She also has qualifications in EMDR (trauma treatment), On-line therapy and is a Licensed Practitioner for 'Understanding your Eating'. She has worked as a counsellor for Relate, the NHS, The London Haven, a centre for women with breast cancer, and the Royal Navy. Alongside her own private practice, Julia has written for many national magazines and newspapers including The Sunday Express magazine, Bella, Marie Claire, She, Essentials and Femail, and written several books. Her radio and television appearances include Woman's Hour, BBC Breakfast and ITV News.

Product Description

Book Description

A self-help book from the Relate relationship experts for people who have not coupled with someone successfully and who wish to find love and enjoy a lasting relationship

From the Back Cover

Have you ever wondered why you always seem to find yourself in problem relationships? How come other people seem secure and settled yet you go from one disaster to another?

It could well be that your feelings about yourself are at the root of the problem. This enlightening guide from trained Relate counselor, Julia Cole, shows how self-esteem, or rather a lack of it, can profoundly affect your close relationships. Whether it is due to your family upbringing, your character or your life experiences, low self-esteem is one of the main reasons for relationship failure. Loving Yourself Loving Another can help you improve your emotional well-being. It covers:

-how you perceive others and what makes you choose a particular partner

-how to manage a difficult relationship where one partner suffers from depression, aggression or withdrawal

-how different relationships work: which type can improve your self-esteem and which type destroys it

- how to build strong 'couple esteem' for a healthy, long-lasting relationship

-how to improve your sexual relationship through 'couple-esteem' exercises and advice.

Here you can find advice, self-awareness quizzes and practical exercises to help you improve your emotional well-being.


Inside This Book (Learn More)
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Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Back Cover
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
163 of 169 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Loving yourself loving another 8 Dec 2004
Format:Paperback
A great book if you feel unloved or not listened to, if you have low self esteem and blame yourself for all the problems or feel you are taking all the blame. I read this book when my relationship was going through a bad patch. It helped me to understand myself and why i felt so low. It gave tips on how to make lifestyle changes in small steps and how to look at problems in a different way to help face them head on and work through them. it made me think about myself and my relationship and how small changes could make such a big difference, It also helped me to realise how lucky i was and things were not as bad as they felt once i tackled my own low self esteem. A very easy read.
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23 of 25 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The importance of self esteem. 21 Dec 2008
By kellz
Format:Paperback
Obviously, having low self esteem can take it's tole on people and this book really points that out. Even before you get into a relationship, your low self esteem can sabatoge it. It's so true and so insightful that I was really amazed at how this can effect someone. A really good book, along with How To Be Wanted: Use the Law of Attraction to Date the Man You Most Desire and Live the Life You Deserve.
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11 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Good book 23 May 2010
A Kid's Review
Format:Paperback
I personally am going through a divorce, the relationship suffered from esteem problems, after reading this book, I have realised where things went wrong and it has helped me to move on. Its an easy read, but dont do that all at once, I suggest that you read only a chapter at a time and then reflection, it works.
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1.0 out of 5 stars Dont buy it 9 Jan 2014
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
The book is written in a bit depressing approach and it is also patronising. I would not recommend it. There are other much better self help books in this field
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5.0 out of 5 stars helpful 23 Dec 2013
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I found this book very helpful and after reading this bought others from the relate collection. Excellent read and some great tasks.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book! 27 Jan 2013
By Tarcia
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
Julie goes into the very issues in a relationship, from the first - to love yourself and then being able to love another in a free way
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