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Lamb: A Novel [Kindle Edition]

Christopher Moore
4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (69 customer reviews)

Print List Price: £9.99
Kindle Price: £6.99 includes VAT* & free wireless delivery via Amazon Whispernet
You Save: £3.00 (30%)
Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
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Book Description

The birth of Jesus has been well chronicled, as have his glorious teachings, acts, and divine sacrifice after his thirtieth birthday. But no one knows about the early life of the Son of God, the missing years - except Biff, the Messiah's best bud, who has been resurrected to tell the story in this divinely hilarious, yet heartfelt work 'reminiscent of Vonnegut and Douglas Adams' (Philadelphia Inquirer).

Verily, the story Biff has to tell is a miraculous one, filled with remarkable journeys, magic, healings, kung fu, corpse reanimations, demons, and hot babes, Even the considerable wiles and devotion of the Saviour's pal may not be enough to divert Joshua from his tragic destiny. But there's no one who loves Josh more - except maybe 'Maggie,' Mary of Magdala - and Biff isn't about to let his extraordinary pal suffer and ascend without a fight.

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Product Description

Book Description

The hilarious (and ever so slightly sacrilegious) true story of the New Testament.

About the Author

Christopher Moore began writing at the age six and became the oldest known child prodigy when, in his early thirties, he published his first novel. Chris enjoys cheese crackers, acid jazz, and otter scrubbing and lives in an inaccessible island fortress in the Pacific.

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 1126 KB
  • Print Length: 512 pages
  • Publisher: Orbit (5 Nov. 2009)
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B002TZ3CA4
  • Text-to-Speech: Not enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Enabled
  • Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (69 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #87,730 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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More About the Author

Christopher Moore was born in Ohio and lived there until he was nineteen, when he moved to California. Before publishing his first novel, Practical Demonkeeping, in 1992, he worked as a roofer, a grocery clerk, a hotel night auditor, and insurance broker, a waiter, a photographer, and a rock and roll DJ. Chris divides his time between Hawaii and San Francisco.

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
28 of 29 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Inspired lunacy 12 April 2003
Did you know that Noah postponed his death for 800 years by convincing a sympathetic Angel of Death that he (Noah) was behind in his paperwork? Such is one of the fascinating factoids found in LAMB, the story of Christ's life as told by his life-long best bud Biff, otherwise known as Levi, son of Alphaeus and Naomi of Nazareth.
Biff, so nick-named for the daily slaps upside his head he required as a child, is raised from the dead in the twentieth century to write another gospel. As the millennium approaches, the Son of God is unhappy with the versions written by Matthew, Mark, Luke and John, and wants a re-write. So, Biff is held a virtual prisoner by his minder, the angel Raziel, in the St. Louis Hyatt Regency until the manuscript is finished.
After a few introductory scenes in which a young Joshua (aka Jesus) restores life to dead lizards, has mixed luck with deceased humans, and becomes infatuated with a budding Mary Magdalene ("Maggie"), Biff's story hits its stride after Joshua, at about thirteen, debates the Pharisees in the Temple of Jerusalem. Then, our two heroes set out for the Far East in search of the Three Wise Men (Balthasar, Gaspar, Melchior) that attended Joshua's birth. From them, in Afghanistan, China, and India, Joshua learns the wisdom of the Eastern religions in preparation for his own ministry. Since Joshua is forbidden by his Heavenly Father from "knowing" women in the biblical sense, he relies on Biff to apprise him of the experience. And Biff, a ladies man, is just the one to do it, especially after several years living with the Eight Chinese Concubines, who have such names as Tiny Feet of the Divine Dance of Joyous Orgasm, Silken Pillows of the Heavenly Softness of Clouds, Pea Pods in Duck Sauce with Crispy Noodle, and Sue (short for Susanna).
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars The New Testament gets an update 25 Oct. 2007
By SonicQuack VINE VOICE
Christopher Moore is very very brave. His works so far have been for the most part extremely funny, setting a benchmark for himself which is hard to consistently write at. Lamb, is not as overtly funny since it is heavily grounded in history. That said, Lamb is still the funniest take on religion out there and of equal importance (and this is where skill with creativity comes in) it is not overtly blasphemous. Sure, it'll have some readers frowning as Jesus gets high on caffeine and gets heal-happy, some will believe that it mocks their chosen religion (for it's not just Christianity that is central to this book - oddly enough) and some will suggest that Jesus could never fit in to a wine amphora and it's just plain ridiculous. Moore doesn't really aim this at people who know The Bible, but is aiming at a larger audience, the General Public, who know all the miracles and stuff, and have a faint idea about the history. So with this in mind Lamb creates a marvelous, although lengthy, wry story, based on a story everyone can relate to. Most of the story details what the existing Gospels ignore, Jesus' adolescence. Kids will be kids right? It's brave and it's very well done. Guaranteed to provide smirks as a minimum.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
Very little is known about the childhood of Christ, and I love Moore's imagination of what happened during those "lost" years between his birth and age 30. In Moore's epilogue, he explains the narrative choices that he made, and they are all plausible, some are even laudable. He has researched his subject, and the poetic license he takes with the story is done with full understanding of his choices.

Although I consider myself a Christian, my knowledge of the Bible is rudimentary. I have not made a lifetime of studying the scriptures, but I did recognize a lot of things that were part of my childhood Sunday school teachings. I appreciate and admire that Moore has given Christ a sense of humor and foibles and doubts. He was, when all is said and done, a human, and growing into the role that he was born to play had to be painful, and even funny, at times. Humor, too, is one of God's creations, and I would love to think that He who died for my sins smiled and joked and was amusingly confused by his situation on occasion.

The story is told through the voice of Biff, Jesus' best childhood friend. Biff is not the unquestioning follower that we might expect to see - he wants to save Jesus from his destiny and protect him from all who would hurt him. He is also tempted by sins of the flesh and swears early and often (but then, many of the characters do, including Jesus). For lack of a better word, he's a goofball, and he's the perfect foil for the serious aspects of the Savior's journey.

Jesus is frustrated at times by the stupidity of people around him. He is amused by the irony of healing the Untouchables by actually touching them. He accepts his chaste life but is curious to hear about what he's missing.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars A book of two halves 17 Nov. 2011
Format:Kindle Edition
I enjoyed more the first part of the book, that described our heroes' studies away from home. The tone of that part of the book was lighter and more entertaining, raising quite a few laughs and chuckles. The narrative style seemed to change once the characters returned home, becoming less flippant as the story had to fit with other accounts of the events of that time. Maybe it didn't change and I'm prejudiced by my (negative) views on religion but I certainly found the latter stages lacking in entertainment value. Not a great book, I wish I had stopped reading as they returned from their travels.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Where all this imagination came from? It is hilarious.
Published 21 days ago by jjperez
2.0 out of 5 stars Lamb
Still trying to read this!
Published 21 days ago by Kate Frost
4.0 out of 5 stars What If Jesus ....
It's not great literature, but a very entertaining read. An excellent Easter gift for someone with an open mind and keen sense of humour. Better than a chocolate egg!
Published 29 days ago by reader
1.0 out of 5 stars One Star
Did not enjoy this at all, bad humour not my thing.
Published 2 months ago by Miss L Blackburn
2.0 out of 5 stars A must for Bible-philes
Not my cup of tea but Bible historians in my Book Club thought it was very good.
Published 3 months ago by Dianne. S
1.0 out of 5 stars The Doofus Bible or the gospel according to a Zionist mole.
I love a good biff at the bible and all things invented to keep the minds of the world in a childlike state. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Mrs. A. C. Woods
5.0 out of 5 stars Laugh out loud
So far this story has had me laughing out loud which I don't usually do
Published 4 months ago by Mr. L. R. Odell
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Zany and Hilarious.
Published 4 months ago by S. Loewenthal
5.0 out of 5 stars Very Enjoyable
After reading many a review by some sort of Pedant, I wasn't sure what to expect. In the end I found just what i was looking for.... Read more
Published 6 months ago by Mh Webster
4.0 out of 5 stars Four Stars
Really enjoyed it, will definately be reading more of Moore.
Published 6 months ago by Caroline Weller
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