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Keeping Mum: Caring for Someone with Dementia Paperback – 25 Mar 2011


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Keeping Mum: Caring for Someone with Dementia + Contented Dementia: A Revolutionary New Way of Treating Dementia : 24-hour Wraparound Care for Lifelong Well-being + Dementia Essentials: How to Guide a Loved One Through Alzheimer's or Dementia and Provide the Best Care
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Product details

  • Paperback: 304 pages
  • Publisher: Hay House UK (25 Mar 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1848502915
  • ISBN-13: 978-1848502918
  • Product Dimensions: 13.2 x 2.4 x 19.8 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (50 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 22,926 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Thrown out of school at 15 for truancy and disruption Marianne travelled the world on her own before discovering philosophy during an Open University Foundation Course.

Marianne is now Director of Studies in Philosophy at Oxford University's Department for Continuing Education, having taught for the colleges of Oxford University since 1987. Podcasts of Marianne's lectures have twice been global number one on the University of iTunes (iTunesU). The lectures are: 'A Romp Through the History of Philosophy' and 'The Nature of Arguments'. Together they have been downloaded 4 million times. They are available on Marianne's personal website: www.mariannetalbot.co.uk or via Oxford University's Philosophy Faculty Website: http://www.philosophy.ox.ac.uk/podcasts

Marianne's latest book is *Critical Reasoning: A Romp Through the Foothills of Logic*, which was published as an e-book in 2014.

Marianne was a carer for 14 years for her beloved parents, both of whom had dementia. For five years Marianne's Mum, who had Alzheimer's, lived with her until, 6 months before her death, she went into a nursing home. Marianne chronicles the love and laughter, and tears and traumas of caring in her book Keeping Mum: Caring For Someone With Dementia. The book has its own website which can be accessed here: www.keepingmum.org.uk

Product Description

Review

This book has all the warmth, humanity and insight that made her Saga blogs such a moving and unmissable read. (Saga Magazine health editor)

In this extraordinarily moving diary, one woman tells how the experience of having to care for someone with dementia almost drove her mad, yet made her life richer. (Daily Mail 2011-03-26)

This heartwarming, incredibly honest account of dealing with dementia is one to read. (The Sun)

From the moment I read Marianne's first blog, I knew we had something special. Each week I laughed and cried along with her thousands of fans and marvelled at her resilience and wisdom. (Melody Rousseau, Online Editor Saga Magazine)

A deeply moving story of their laughter and their pain. (Daily Mail 2011-03-26)

The Blog 'Keeping Mum' on the SAGA website is truly wonderful. As I read, I found myself moved to tears by the beautiful articulation and reflection evident in the author's thoughts and feelings. One can really begin to 'feel' the emotional journey and empathise with Marianne and her mother as they face numerous daily challenges.

There is currently a paucity of 'real - life stories' in health literature surrounding issues of unpaid caring in the community. A book based on the Blog would make a highly valuable contribution to this topic and help raise awareness. A book would be especially beneficial to healthcare professionals and enabling them to better understand and appreciate the challenging situations encountered by many unpaid carers.

(Andy Richardson Lecturer - Faculty of Health Sciences University of Southampton)

Valuable suggestions on how to cope with frustrating circumstances and is peppered with useful tips on dealing with a wide variety of situations from incontinence to living wills. (Nursing Standard)

About the Author

Marianne Talbot left school at 15. She is now Director of Studies in philosophy at Oxford University's Department for Continuing Education, where she specialises in ethics and the philosophy of mind. Marianne cared for both her parents from a distance for 9 years before bringing her mum to live with her. She enjoys swimming, cycling, reading detective novels and going out with friends. A donation of 5 per cent of the author's profits from sales of the book will go to Alzheimer's Research UK.

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Customer Reviews

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

21 of 22 people found the following review helpful By Mr. Albert J. Jewell on 17 April 2011
Format: Kindle Edition
As someone who has reviewed numerous books on dementia, I have no hesitation in saying that this remarkable book is the best I have read to date for family carers. Based upon Talbot's Saga blogs, it chronicles the day by day experience over three years of someone of who had earlier cared at a distance for her mother (as well as her father) alongside a demanding job at Oxford University before taking her into her own home. Through humour and at times devastating honesty she steers a path between over-optimism and over-pessimism which will accord with the experience of many carers. Each blog entry highlights a particular challenge posed by Alzheimer's and includes a highlighted practical suggestion for those who find themselves in the same boat. The final section comprises a comprehensive list of available resources from one who has navigated the complexities of accessing necessary help. The many frustrations of dealing with `the authorities' are clearly recorded but she is full of praise for the day care and eventual residential care her mother received - indeed admits that it would have been better had the latter started earlier. She vividly expresses the fury she quite often felt, the inescapable sense of guilt and the strains that caring places upon relationships with the wider family. There is a fascinating sub-plot featuring the relationship between Mum's FatCat and Marianne's Oedipus which in a way mirrors the remarkable mother-daughter relationship. Suffice to say that I laughed and cried in equal measure and trust that the book will have a wide and appreciative readership.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By nannaglam on 25 April 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book should be COMPULSORY READING for every healthcare professional, especially for GPs and people carrying out home assessments. It should also be read by those who have no first hand experience of caring for someone with dementia, in the hope that they might be a little less patronising and more understanding towards those who do!

For the first time I feel as though I am not alone in experiencing what it means to have a dearly loved mother struggling with dementia and the awful feelings of guilt, worry, sleeplessness, anger and loss that this brings with it.

My lovely old mum is 94; we still have lots of laughs together, but she is rapidly declining. I am doing everything I can to keep her in her own home where she feels safe and secure and hope I will be successful in doing this right to the end, whenever that is.

Thank you Marianne for making me realise that I am caring for mum to the best of my ability and that I should stop beating myself up because I can't do everything!
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11 of 12 people found the following review helpful By sarahscarratt on 2 May 2011
Format: Paperback
My mother-in-law started showing signs of dementia a couple of years ago. Getting her GP to communicate with us was impossible; battling to get Social Services involved has been an uphill struggle, especially as we live abroad. Finally, in November, just three weeks after carers started visiting her daily, my mother-in-law was picked up by the police after two incidents of nocturnal wandering, and she was taken to a home. During the past two years, we have read all sorts of books on dementia, from the practical 'what shall we do with mother' type of books to the 'still alice' personal stories. Each offer a different perspective and are useful in their own way. This book - Keeping Mum - combines both. We read the very personal and moving stories of Mariane and her Mum, with lots of helpful tips along the way, plus a whole section of practical information at the end. So many times I exclaimed - "that's completely true, that happened to us..." and marked pages to read aloud to my husband. In some ways, it is like sharing your story with a very good friend whom you completely trust and can share anything with, without fear of censure or criticism. I'd say it is a must-read if you are in this situation, or even if you know someone who is - it would certainly help you to understand their feelings. It's also a very easy read - broken down into little chapters you can pick up and put down whenever. 'And still the music plays', 'the 36hr day' (both available on Amazon) and the article 'Understanding the dementia experience' by Jennifer Ghent Fuller are other sources of information I can recommend.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By Richard P on 21 Sep 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Bought this book with three others having been a carer for two years and got very frustrated with insufficient information and help from the NHS and Social Services. If the person you care for has more than a small amount of income and capital, don't expect much from the NHS and Social Services. You'll have to find a lot of time to search for, read and understand information about illnesses, symptoms, healthcare, social care, funding, private and voluntary sector services, visit and assess care homes, and do just about everything yourself. For me, this book was easy and enjoyable to read and it has lots of useful information much of which I knew but some that I didn't. It doesn't matter if the person you care for bears little resemblence to the author's mum. I would also recommend the books The Selfish Pig's Guide to Caring and Contented Dementia.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By Elizabeth Willis on 8 Dec 2011
Format: Paperback
I've read the medical books, the text books, the dry informative books about dementia, so I feel I understand, intellectually, what is happening to my Mum, but this book is the first and only book I've read that is about a person. Not only the person with dementia, but also the person doing the caring. It is REAL. And has FEELINGS, not always pleasant. And because it was written as a blog, you feel you are experiencing the issues and feelings alongside the author. I have found her uncompromising honesty and frankness to be so comforting and reassuring. And the practical tips are a huge help too. What a relief. I'm buying more copies for everyone else I know who's dealing with dementia.
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