I bought this for a 'friend' who is rather a fan of the work of the late, great Michael Sheard, particularly his portrayal of Maurice Bronson from Grange Hill.
I had to buy a bald wig too of course, to get the proper effect, but she had been moaning for quite some time about how I never listened to her and never did anything to please her blah, blah, blah, blah blah. So I came home early from work and set about the transformation. I thought I looked a little too much like the nutcase in charge of Germany until 1945 actually but then I gather Mr Sheard made that character his own as well so perhaps that was no bad thing.
Anyway, I grabbed myself a blue pencil and waited patiently for my 'friend's' return. Unfortunately, it had completely slipped my mind that she would be returning on that particular evening with her parents and her sister in tow. They in turn assumed that it must have slipped my mind to put any other clothes on apart from a bowtie and this toupee. I didn't quite look as bad as Frank Butcher in that famous scene from EastEnders (he was bald for a start - he should perhaps have bought himself one of these toupees?) and I did at least manage to deliver Bronson's famous line, 'Walk - don't run!' at full volume as my 'friend's' family hotfooted it straight from the premises. But we did have rather a romantic evening after that. Well, we had rather a romantic ten minutes, which was and still is just about the limits of my stamina. But I'm sure she appreciated my efforts.