- Paperback: 304 pages
- Publisher: Know the Score Books (4 May 2006)
- Language English
- ISBN-10: 1905449488
- ISBN-13: 978-1905449484
- Product Dimensions: 21.2 x 13.8 x 2.6 cm
- Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars See all reviews (33 customer reviews)
- Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 409,110 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Product Description
Review
This book is witty, fast-paced and highly entertaining. You really feel the rollercoaster sense that is associated with the search for Mr Right - at the end of the day we're all either doing it or have done it. The anecdotes are hugely amusing at times, but Elliott never feels the need to be downright rude about any of the men she came across. --Trashionista.com
Product Description
"I'm Celibate...Get Me Out of Here!" tells a wickedly humorous and compulsive story of modern dating that will make you cringe and cry with laughter in equal measure. Jo typifies the vast number of busy, independent-minded, thirty-something women, who are impatiently hunting for their dream partner. Having explored all the traditional avenues for meeting her ideal man, with much trepidation Jo takes a reluctant peek at a dating website. "That's for freaks and weirdos" she cries before plunging in and e-registering. Jo's rollercoaster dating ride takes her through a never-ending succession of encounters with dysfunctional and deluded men who lie about everything (especially their height), advertise themselves with fake pictures and use names, such as BigCock4U, Personal_Slave and want-a-baby. She endures dull dates failing to live up to her fantasies, bizarre requests involving handcuffs and custard pies and the realisation that she has fallen in love with someone over the keyboard, without ever having actually met them. Then there's the angry wife she didn't know existed, who has chanced upon her errant husband's emails...Even when Jo changes tactics and embarks upon a speed-dating session, she meets a charmer who tells her that twenty dates in one night is a bargain not to be scoffed at and saves him at least 'seventy sheets'. Amongst this smorgasbord of fraudulent and often desperate people there are some decent blokes, but none, it appears, are right for Jo. Is it possible to meet someone suitable via the internet? Jo is forced to confront her unforeseen naivety as she realizes that things are never as straightforward as they seem. She has to learn to understand what it is she really wants. "Incredibly I'm Celibate...Get Me Out of Here!" is a hilarious true story. Every single dating adventure and disaster really did happen. The author has merely changed the names of all those concerned to protect the guilty! Written with devilish wit for the generation who have grown out of all those schmaltzy "Bridget Jones" love stories, "I'm Celibate...Get Me Out of Here!" delivers a uniquely female take on the way modern lovers meet - or don't.
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Customer Reviews
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
I borrowed my girlfriend's copy when I thought she had finished. It turned into a tug of war trying to finish it first so we had to go and buy another copy to avoid a major barney. Top fun and makes you wonder how us guys think we'll ever be able to meet a nice girl when we really don't make it easy for ourselves in the first place! Buy this book - I recommend it if you're after a good belly laugh and a severe cringe factor from 95% of the book's inhabitants. They sadly exist!
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
This book is very easy to read and there are many parts that make you laugh out loud. I have had internet dating experience - and it made me feel a whole load better to find that it wasn't just me who's experienced the stange email messages and laughed at the pictures attached.
The author's writing style is very matter of fact - and knowing that these are real experiences makes them even more amusing.
Finding a partner is hard work in this modern world. I hope that she has now met someone who wears decent shoes, makes her happy in the real world and is able to leave the search for cyber love behind. Let's face it, it isn't as if she hasn't given it a go!
The author's writing style is very matter of fact - and knowing that these are real experiences makes them even more amusing.
Finding a partner is hard work in this modern world. I hope that she has now met someone who wears decent shoes, makes her happy in the real world and is able to leave the search for cyber love behind. Let's face it, it isn't as if she hasn't given it a go!
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Hilarious!
This is a great book - very insighful and made me laugh out loud several times! You can really imagine that you're there with Jo on all of her dates and willing that just one of... Read more
Published 8 months ago by Ms. Kay Limb
Best Book I've Read in Ages
This is a brilliant, brilliant book for any woman who has had her fair share of boyfriends, her friends say she's 'too fussy' and can laugh at the dating disasters she's had. Read more
Published 16 months ago by Ali
I'm Celibate Get Me Out Of Here
Jo when ae you going to write another book to continue your stories - dying to know if you ever met anyone to have a relationship with online. Read more
Published on 3 Oct 2009 by Mrs. Lisa Potter
Totally Addictive!!
Being in internet dater myself, (with success I might add) I couldn't resist a personal account of fellow internet dater... Read more
Published on 28 Dec 2007 by EntrepeneurKentUK
Loved it!
I absolutely loved this book, it's so true to the trials and tribulations of meeting a person from the internet. It was a really funny book, hope there is a sequel! Read more
Published on 22 Aug 2007 by Droopy_Ears
The highs and lows of Internet Dating.
You have to admire Joe's perseverance with a line-up of motley characters, hoping that each one will be better (and taller) than the last. Read more
Published on 28 Mar 2007 by Barry Leeder
Someone give this woman a medal...
I can not recommend this book enough. Not only is it incredibly funny (I was continually annoying people on public transport by laughing out loud), it is so perceptive and... Read more
Published on 12 Jan 2007 by M. James
Laugh out loud!
A friend recommended this book and I'm so glad they did. Well written, funny and sincere, it makes a refreshing change from all those books about women looking for cheap thrills on... Read more
Published on 2 Nov 2006 by Chaz Woods
Fantastic
Fantastic, could not put it down, hilarious and makes you laugh out loud. Hard to believe its all true. Keep up the good work Jo and start the sequel soon plase.
Published on 31 Oct 2006 by P. Shepherd
Fab book
This is the funniest book I've read in a long time. Got me a lot of strange looks on the train from laughing out loud. It's not just out for laughs though. Read more
Published on 26 Oct 2006 by Tricky Vicky
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