I Want to See My Kids! [Paperback]

"Maybe this book should be sent to every MP, Judge, Barrister and
Solicitor in the UK! CAFCASS too.

I really enjoyed reading it, I found it VERY therapeutic; it is the book I
would have liked to write."

Tina Rayburn and Timothy Forder's new book `I want to see my kids'
is the first in a generation of new books to be published that bears
witness to the suffering of fathers, mothers and their children at the hand
of Britain's secret family courts.

This eloquent and moving testament is overflowing with humanity, compassion
and understanding. It dispenses invaluable advice, in a calm, authoritative
tone. It is without doubt an essential read for every father or mother who
is separated or divorced and wants to understand how devastating family
breakdown can be and how the family justice system in this country, instead
of saving your family, may ultimately destroy it.

Buy it. Read it. Read it again.

The break up of the family will almost certainly mean the end
of every day contact between a father and his child, even where he has
cared for his baby since birth. For some dads, this will be too much to
bear, others will learn to survive without their children. 'I Want to See
My Kids!' is a complete overview of a system that pretends to protect the
family - father, mother and child - but fails dismally in every respect.
It is a moving account of fathers who face the extreme prejudice of welfare
officers, lawyers and the family courts, but refuse to lose contact with
their children. Drawing on true-life experiences, this book is an
invaluable guide to separating parents on the pitfalls to avoid and the
positive steps to take to provide a life for children after divorce.

It is a wake up call to all parents. With one in two marriages ending in
divorce and two thirds of these affecting children, the harrowing
experiences described in this book could happen to anyone - even to you.

When Tim and I got together to write this book, it was after
five years of speculative filming with the initial view of making a
documentary. We interviewed judges, CAFCASS, solicitors, child
psychiatrists, mums, grandparents, aunties, uncles and children. Most of
all we interviewed men. Men - lots and lots of dads. Each father began by
telling us that their story would be the worst case we had ever heard. And
for that moment, it would be. Men to whom I was a complete stranger would
break down and weep for the children they had lost to the family courts.
Big men - firefighters, soldiers, policemen. Hard working, decent men.
Men who anyone would be proud to call their father. For five years we
listened, following each case history to its awful, unacceptable
conclusion. The lost childhoods, the destroyed lives. Sometimes the
unecessary suffering we witnessed was too much too bear and we cried too.

When no documentary was forthcoming, we decided to write a book - an honest
appraisal of every trauma our families had ever experienced and along the
way, advice that sprung from all those years of analysing the family court
system.
The result is I Want to See My Kids! - the title taken from the haunting
chant that fathers shout on their protest marches - many of which we
attended.

We wrote this book for everyone thinking of having a child -thinking of
setting up home together, thinking of separating. We wrote this book so
that the extended family may have a voice and also to help them understand
what their sons may be going through. We wrote this book so that the
secrets of the families court can be revealed - not just one or two hideous
miscarriages of justice - but hundreds of insane decisions that are being
made today - every day. But most of all we wrote this book for the
children.