and over 2 million other books are available for Amazon Kindle . Learn more
Trade in your item
Get a £0.29
Gift Card.
Have one to sell?
Flip to back Flip to front
Listen Playing... Paused   You're listening to a sample of the Audible audio edition.
Learn more
See all 2 images

The Hypochondriac's Pocket Guide to Horrible Diseases You Probably Already Have Paperback – 23 Nov 2005


See all 5 formats and editions Hide other formats and editions
Amazon Price New from Used from
Kindle Edition
"Please retry"
Library Binding
"Please retry"
Paperback
"Please retry"
£63.06 £0.87


Trade In this Item for up to £0.29
Trade in The Hypochondriac's Pocket Guide to Horrible Diseases You Probably Already Have for an Amazon Gift Card of up to £0.29, which you can then spend on millions of items across the site. Trade-in values may vary (terms apply). Learn more

Product details

  • Paperback: 208 pages
  • Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing PLC (23 Nov. 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1596910615
  • ISBN-13: 978-1596910614
  • Product Dimensions: 10.7 x 1.9 x 15.8 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 727,735 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, and more.

Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars
5 star
1
4 star
0
3 star
0
2 star
0
1 star
0
See the customer review
Share your thoughts with other customers

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By TeensReadToo TOP 500 REVIEWER on 23 Mar. 2007
Format: Paperback
First off, this is not a book for the faint of heart. It is, however, the perfect read for those with an off-the-wall sense of humor.

Mr. DiClaudio has compiled a list of forty-five of the most outlandish, obscure, and downright nasty diseases that you're likely to ever run across. Hopefully, on second thought, you'll never run across any of them, but in case you do, if you've read this book you'll at least be prepared for the horrid and totally disgusting ways with which you will suffer.

The diseases are broken up into categories, including Autoimmune, Bacterial, Genetic & Neurological, Idiopathic, Parasitic, Toxic & Fungal, and Viral & Prionic.

Although I found myself laughing hysterically at some of Mr. DiClaudio's observations, I sincerely hope to never find myself on the receiving end of these diseases. And, truth be told, I can't decide if I'd rather have worms living on my eyeball, having my flesh begin to decay while I'm still alive, or suffering from fatal familial insomnia (in which case, I'll never sleep again, and will probably spend my final waking hours wishing I had a disease as simple as worms living on my eyeball or having my flesh decay while I'm still alive).

Overall, a great way to spend a couple of hours. However, if you suspect you suffer from any of these forty-five diseases, you might want to actually see a doctor.

**Due to the graphic nature of many of these diseases, this book is only recommended for older, mature readers -- with steel stomachs.

Reviewed by: Jennifer Wardrip, aka "The Genius"
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again

Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)

Amazon.com: 27 reviews
22 of 23 people found the following review helpful
A Repulsive, Yet Oddly Compelling Guide To Strange, Scary, And Very Nasty Diseases 6 July 2006
By Robert I. Hedges - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Paperback
Medical editor and improvisational humorist Dennis DiClaudio has written an amazing book. It is essentially a pocket guide to selected horrible, scary, and interesting diseases presented in a quirky, humorous way. These diseases are neatly organized by categories (autoimmune, fungal, genetic, etc.) and cover only the most unusual of dread diseases. Sure, the book covers some more commonly known diseases like leprosy, acromegaly, and furious rabies, but it really shines when discussing truly obscure maladies such as fatal familial insomnia, cyclic vomiting syndrome (which, while it may not kill you, will make you wish it had,) alien hand syndrome (which gets my vote for most unusual neurological condition of all time,) and amnesic shellfish poisoning, which will make you forget all about the prawns you just ate (as well as everything else, for that matter.)

While all of these diseases are horrible in their own way, the one I find to be the most singularly scary is candiru infestation. This is the nastiest thing I have ever heard of: if you swim in the Amazon or Orinoco rivers a small, slender species of catfish called the candiru, but better known as the vampire fish, likes to swim up your urethra and lodge itself in your urinary tract. This hurts a lot. Do not try to pull it out because (surprise!) it has rearward pointing barbs that unfurl like an umbrella that will make it more firmly ensconced in its new home, where it spends its hours running sharp grating teeth all over your most sensitive parts to make a meal of your blood. (Some men have decided to have an otherwise unthinkable type of surgical amputation to make the pain stop.) As a side note, DiClaudio points out that there is legislation pending to outlaw importing candiru into the US, a measure that will, no doubt, get wide bipartisan support.

Even the more conventional diseases like bubonic plague and encephalitis are examined in a new and eerily entertaining light. I noted with a bit of trepidation that encephalitis can be caused by many, many other diseases, which DiClaudio helpfully lists in part; these include, but are not limited to: chicken pox, monkey pox, camel pox, canary pox, mollusci pox, sheep pox, vole pox, Aleutian mink disease, Andean potato mottle virus, hemagglutinating virus of Japan, O'Nyong-Nyong, coital exanthema virus, Kyzylagach virus, yug bogdanovac virus, and mumps, just to name a few. Clearly you need to have an encephalitis contingency plan in place.

This book is actually full of good information, though I advise true hypochondriacs not even be allowed in the same room as this book. These diseases are scary, sure, but through DiClaudio's masterful prose and dry sense of humor, medical education actually becomes enjoyable with this book.

I highly recommend this to anyone with a good (if slightly warped) sense of humor, but the medically squeamish need not apply.
8 of 8 people found the following review helpful
Uproariously Funny...Unless, of course, you actually suffer from one of these diseases 26 Feb. 2007
By TeensReadToo - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
First off, this is not a book for the faint of heart. It is, however, the perfect read for those with an off-the-wall sense of humor.

Mr. DiClaudio has compiled a list of forty-five of the most outlandish, obscure, and downright nasty diseases that you're likely to ever run across. Hopefully, on second thought, you'll never run across any of them, but in case you do, if you've read this book you'll at least be prepared for the horrid and totally disgusting ways with which you will suffer.

The diseases are broken up into categories, including Autoimmune, Bacterial, Genetic & Neurological, Idiopathic, Parasitic, Toxic & Fungal, and Viral & Prionic.

Although I found myself laughing hysterically at some of Mr. DiClaudio's observations, I sincerely hope to never find myself on the receiving end of these diseases. And, truth be told, I can't decide if I'd rather have worms living on my eyeball, having my flesh begin to decay while I'm still alive, or suffering from fatal familial insomnia (in which case, I'll never sleep again, and will probably spend my final waking hours wishing I had a disease as simple as worms living on my eyeball or having my flesh decay while I'm still alive).

Overall, a great way to spend a couple of hours. However, if you suspect you suffer from any of these forty-five diseases, you might want to actually see a doctor.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
At last! The perfect gift for the man (or woman) who thinks they have everything. 24 May 2007
By Geryjo - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Paperback
If you have the nerve, and are into perverse entertainment, this is the book for you -- or someone who will appreciate midnight black humor with a glossy blue sheen. We're talking forty-five horrifying ways that Nature is out to get you, with plenty of gruesome details on how she will succeed, and the pitiful or nonexistent steps you can take to protect yourself.

The writing is excellent. The author has a way with words, content aside. It really takes talent to make me laugh out loud, all the way through a book, especially when what I'm reading is also giving me cold sweats and an irregular heartbeat. I couldn't put the book down, and now I'm afraid to move or breathe. Other people have to get their thrills on mountain tops -- me, I can sit right here, white knuckled, waiting for unspeakable dangers to come to me. I am now regarding my cats and coworkers with suspicion -- no, outright terror.

Three days ago, I had no trouble making the leap from tiny flickering pain in my head to malignant brain tumor. Now I look at that self-diagnosis as a sign of childlike innocence. Do you have any idea how many truly unspeakable, debilitating, and deadly diseases start out with a simple rash or swelling? Numbness, coughing, itching, of course headaches, the list of innocuous symptoms is comprehensive, and all symptoms seem to lead to blindness and loss of body parts.

I find the ailment Fibrodysplasia Ossificans Progressiva, where your immune system decides to replace your sore muscles with bone, particularly insidious, although I feel better about not going to the gym now. Another favorite: Fatal Familial Insomnia, in which you never sleep again. (It's now 2 a.m. -- I'm feeling perky, and worried.) Furious Rabies, Norwegian Scabies, very bad. And let's not ignore good old pinworms, which 1 in 10 of us have at this minute and everyone has a 50/50 shot at getting at some point before they die (probably not from pinworms, which, by the way, are IN your butt and come out at night to lay their eggs ON your butt. Remember that time you scratched your itchy butt? Yuh huh. Trust me, the least of your worries. You want to be focusing on Scleroderma, in which your skin and organs slowly harden and you begin to resemble a statue, or Myasis, in which maggots crawl around beneath your skin. If you're lucky you'll get off with Chronic Idiopathic Diarrhea or Cyclic Vomiting Syndrome. Both of which sound marginally better than the Mycobacteriosis I could get from changing the water in my fishbowl, or Bacillary Angiomatosis (cat scratch fever).

Giving this book to a full-blown hypochondriac is what passive aggressive behavior is all about. Or, you just think your mom will really get a kick out of it.
6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
Funniest book I ever read 26 Feb. 2006
By Jay Freeman - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Paperback
I was in hysterics before I even left the book store. I read it aloud to my wife and sister who were totally disgusted with me. I think it must be read to oneself rather than aloud to others. Just be thankful if you don't have any of the 45 horrible diseases described in this book. Then stay awake wondering if you have any of the symptoms.
11 of 14 people found the following review helpful
You wont be able to put it down! 14 Dec. 2005
By KatieMC - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Paperback
Amazing yet true maladies of the world! I bought this book knowing it would be funny and was more then pleased when i actually read it, yet slightly disturbed that i might be dying!
Were these reviews helpful? Let us know

Look for similar items by category


Feedback