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How to be a Happy Stepmum Paperback – 6 May 2010


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Frequently Bought Together

How to be a Happy Stepmum + The Step-Parents' Parachute: The Four Cornerstones of Good Step-parenting + Relate Guide To Step Families: Living Successfully with Other People's Children (Relate Guides)
Price For All Three: £31.36

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Product details

  • Paperback: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Vermilion (6 May 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0091929628
  • ISBN-13: 978-0091929626
  • Product Dimensions: 13.5 x 1.8 x 21.6 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 70,041 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Review

"This is an essential book for any woman who has taken on the often-confusing role of being a stepmum. It provides valuable information, practical guidance, honest challenges and bucket loads of support. This frank and encouraging book demonstrates that enjoying a happy family life is still more than possible" (Relate)

Book Description

The only practical guide on the market for stepmums, from a leading authority in the field

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Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Index | Back Cover
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Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By helen enchelmaier on 9 Oct. 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I would strongly recommend this book, and not just for stepmums, but for the husbands or partners in a step-family too. The core themes, of the importance of communication, patience, understanding are relevant to both sexes. And the core problems, such as not being sure what your role is, feeling resentful, the ex causing issues, are also something that both adults in the relationship could think about.

The book was easy to read, in that it was free from gobbledygook type jargon. It was inspiring however, and thought provoking. It was organised and structured in its approach, but most importantly it came up with ways of dealing with the problems of being a step-mum that are positive and aimed at reducing animosity long term. It does not advocate being a doormat, but the approach does remind us that to be truly happy we do need to give and take, and let time tell, and be patient and kind -not constantly trying to assert our rights and territory. Often in the book - and this is a good thing - the author does not preach to the reader what the correct answer to a problem is (such as who disciplines the children?), but reminds us that whatever it may be will come from the step parent and biological parent communicating honestly about the problem together, agreeing a solution and applying it consistently.

I read the book cover to cover, but have already delved into it from time to time to read back over some passages that I found particularly helpful, and advised my partner to read it too.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By Amazon Customer on 4 Oct. 2013
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Got this book as although I'm not new to the game, I was struggling with a few issues that weren't going away. Lisa provides realistic, practical advice to help you and your partner work through the problems you face. Also good that she quotes other stepmums, so you are reassured that it's not just you who feels what you feel, and your mental/emotional struggles are not unique. A recommended read for new-to-the-role stepmums, as well as the veteran ones!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By AJ on 16 Jan. 2015
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I can't recommend this book highly enough. As a relatively new step mum to 4 children I felt invaded and resentful each fortnight they came to stay in 'my house'
I felt guilty, selfish, lost and confused. I don't have children of my own and had never dealt with so many young children at once.
This book helps you work through the causes, of frustration and provides solutions. I cried when I read the quotes from other women who felt the same as I did. I felt such relief that I wasn't alone, and then cried again reading quotes by children, as I realised the kids were probably feeling as confused about everything as I was.
My partner has been so open to the suggestions in this book, and we now have house rules in place. My house is 'our home', the children's behaviour has improved, they are so much more content, and adapted really quickly to the changes. My relationship with the children is now a 'positive' to being with my partner, and I ensure that I do something with each child on their own each time they come, and for special occasions spend an afternoon with them doing something we both enjoy.
We ensure that each time we are together as a family we do something together as a family, be it hide and seem in the local woods, or deciding what to cook for a themed dinner that night.
There are times when I feel I could do with the kids not coming, but I find that once they're here it's great fun. My parents have been so open and welcoming to the children, and the kids said themselves that although they'd prefer their mum and dad to be together, this arrangement is a really good second best. (The parents have been separated for 3 years)
I now love the Sunday morning 'invasion' of children in the bed playing 'there were 6 in the bed'.... And feel lucky that these wonderful children have so readily accepted me in their lives.
Thank you thank you thank you for writing this book, I really don't know what I'd have done without it,
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By tup77 on 21 Feb. 2013
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
this is a really well written and easy to read book. it has helpful quizzes to help you assess where you are and lots of information based on research which gives you an idea of what other stepmums feel. this helps you feel 'normal' as every possible negative emotion you can have experienced is covered. i should have read this years ago.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By C. DUFFY on 14 Jun. 2010
Format: Paperback
Easy to read. Read it cover to cover in 2 days. Helpful to know that there are others out there in the same boat! Thanks.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By LisaS on 20 Aug. 2013
Format: Paperback
How to be a Happy Stepmum is full of practical, helpful advice that really helps when you are a new stepfamily. This book was published just as we were all trying to adjust to being a family and I found it really useful and supportive as I didn't know many other people who had gone through it. Several years later, I still refer to it.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Ms. P. A. Lawrence on 10 May 2010
Format: Paperback
This book is written for anyone who has found themselves in the realm of being a step-parent, and suddenly realises that falling in love and having to accept your new family are not the major hurdles, indeed the real hurdle is everything else that goes with the title "step Parent".

This is obviously written by someone who has found themselves emerged in this , inherited family status and has worked to win and has then spoken to other Step mums and actually listened, pondered, learnt and then written.

If you have recently been rudely and abruptly woken from the world of true love and slung into the real and sometimes harsh world of step parenting, then this book will guide, advise and support you through this real and new environment. And even if you have been doing it for years it will help to know that there are hundreds, thousands, more of us out there and that Dr. Doodson took the time to understand and write this book.

I am gushing but I am VERY grateful to the author

Thank you Dr Doodson, it is the real world but I am not alone!
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