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How to Break Your Addiction to a Person Paperback – 1 Dec 2003

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Product details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Bantam Books; Reprint edition (1 Dec. 2003)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0553382497
  • ISBN-13: 978-0553382495
  • Product Dimensions: 13.2 x 1.5 x 21 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (33 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 84,754 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Product Description

About the Author

Howard M. Halpern received his Ph.D. in clinical psychology from Columbia University in 1954. He taught at Columbia and other colleges and has been a consultant, clinical psychologist, and psychotherapist at several New York colleges and clinics. He was the codirector of the New York Student Consultation Center and is a past president of the American Academy of Psychotherapists.

Dr. Halpern has practiced psychotherapy in New York City for forty-eight years. His previous books include Cutting Loose: An Adult Guide to Coming to Terms with Your Parents and Finally Getting It Right. He also wrote a nationally syndicated newspaper column called "On Your Own". His appearances on national media include Donahue, The Today Show, 20/20, and CNN.

Inside This Book

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First Sentence
MAYBE THE SURGEON GENERAL hasn't determined it yet, but staying in a bad relationship may be dangerous to your health. Read the first page
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Customer Reviews

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

116 of 117 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on 19 Dec. 2004
Format: Paperback
I read this book out of desperation. I bought this book to help me to completely let go of my past relationship with a man. Thing with me is that he actually left over 3 years ago, but i still get annoyed and hurt by what he did to me. I bought this book to help me understand what my problem is.
The book is very clear and simple to understand and gives examples of different types of attachments which sometimes lead to addiction. It also gives examples of different people and the way they feel about their partners. I think i was deffinately addicted to my ex. I have read this book once and it did make a lot of sense. I will read it again and do the practices in there. No book is a cure, but this is the only book i have read that made sense to me and actually showed what my attachment to my ex actually was. I recommend this book to anyone who is stuck in a relationship that is causing them too much pain yet they cannot leave and also to those people whose relationships have ended but they are still thinking about the past and not being able to move forward. It will help but the rest is upto us. We must be strong !
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17 of 17 people found the following review helpful By Shantimar on 9 Dec. 2008
Format: Paperback
Each one of us thought we were unique, didn't we? In the book, and now in the reviews, we see we have been acting out a template. How sobering! The "great love" which we had been romantically proud of and regarded as the great event of our otherwise ordinary lives, was, more prosaically, an addiction, a reflection of our own insecurities and needs. Well, one must face the truth,right? This book can be a great help in realizing what is actually going on. It's very well explained, in simple language, without telling you what to do or judging you if you don't have the courage to go ahead and change things. And the examples ring a bell!
I don't think that recognizing the addiction for what it is means that you are halfway towards conquering it. As with food, or alcohol, or smoking, it takes much more than admitting to it. But, of course, it's the first step, and it should be done.
This realization does take the glamour away from what we're doing, which hopefully should help us on our road towards changing our behaviour.
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106 of 109 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on 22 Jan. 2002
Format: Mass Market Paperback
I came across this book in a book shop by coincidence four years ago. I had just been divorced from my husband of 19 years. I was feeling hurt, and lonely. I had very low self esteem. I could not move on although I desparately wanted to. When I saw the title of this book, I thought it had nothing to do with me, because I was too proud to admit that I was addicted to my ex-husband. I spent an hour in the book shop going back to this book a few times. In the end I bought it. I convinced myself that it was cheap and I could throw it away after a few pages. As I read it, I was amazed to discover that I was actually 'addicted'. Halfway through the book, I had the courage to let go off my old relationship. A few months after that, I met a gorgeous man and fell in love. We have been together since then.
This book helped me bury my old relationship and move on. I have been recommending this book to all my friends who find it difficult to cope with a relationship break up.
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87 of 90 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on 29 May 2005
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
It is so rare to find a self help book that does exactly what it claims to do. But this one does. If, like me, you have been trying for years to break free from a relationship that you knew was wrong for you, but somehow cannot bring yourself to take that final step, buy this book. Finally, I was able to do what I needed to do. The book is very helpful at explaining some of the reasons why you might be addicted - when you recognise, and admit to those, you are half way there to making the break. But the book is not just about ending a relationship. Wisely, it acknowledges that there may be good things in the relationship, but that they will not become clear to you unless you learn to see the person as a whole human being, and not just the object of your addiction. The author is wise, without being judgemental. If you've worked your way through books like Robin Norwood's "Women who love too much", and recognised yourself in them, but still not been able to break free, try this book.
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11 of 11 people found the following review helpful By Amica on 10 Jan. 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I bought this book among many others in the hope that I would get the strength I needed to break free from a very dysfunctional and unhealthy relationship. I had been with this man, on and off for almost 5 years and although I knew it was killing me, I kept going back to him. I got engaged to him also even though I knew I would never marry him.

I was losing respect from family and friends and had no self respect left whatsoever. I needed to understand why I was in this self defeating cycle and how I could break free from it.

This is the best self-help book I have ever read. I am a journalist and read a lot. I have never before read a book that I so identified with. If you are in a dead-end, destructive relationship - be it mental or physical - beg, steal, borrow or buy a copy of this book.

I am currently in the withdrawal part of my break-up but now feel I will never go back. I simply can't having learned as much as I have about myself and the relationship I was in, thanks to the author.

Even if you are not ready to make the break yet but know in your heart you have to get out - read it.

Good luck on your journey and get the hell out!How to Break Your Addiction to a Person
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