How to Archer: The Ultimate Guide to Espionage and Style and Women, and Also Cocktails Ever Written: The Ultimate Guide to Espionage, Style, Women, and Cocktails Ever Written [Paperback]

"How to Archer" is a companion book to the Adam Reed television show Archer: Season 1, which is an animated series about a spy (Archer) who works for the International Secret Intelligence Service (ISIS). If you are unfamiliar with the television show, I should stop you right here and recommend you watch a few episodes to obtain an understanding of the characters and premise. The book is self-contained and you don't need to be familiar with past plot lines on the show, but you do need to have a basic understanding of Archer or the humor of the book will be mostly lost on you. You need to be able to read the book in Archer's voice to get a real grasp on it and appreciate it. Even the title's awkward non sequitur should jump out at you as "classic Archer" rather than confuse. So if you're a fan of the show, or once you've seen a couple episodes, you're ready to jump in and learn about the most important aspects of being a top ISIS agent - namely getting drunk, having sex with as many women as possible, and picking out the perfect turtleneck for a nighttime stealth mission.

In the tradition of his previous shows, SeaLab 2021 and Frisky Dingo, Reed has created a humorous look at what is presumably a 1960s (though the characters use some modern technology) intelligence agency that is lead by an agent who is arrogant, crass, sexist, egotistical, reckless, and self-serving. He believes he is God's gift to women and the US government, and is ready to share the secrets to becoming a master spy in his new book. The first thing fans of the show will likely appreciate is that this is not just a tie-in book thrown out there by FX to make a quick buck from the show or to promote season 3. You're not going to see pages wasted with "character dossiers" and episode summaries that are taken almost verbatim from the show's web site. This is mostly 100% original material created by Adam Reed (the actual author) for the book, and although you don't get the benefit of the excellent voice acting from the series, it reads just like a new episode of the show. Written in stream of consciousness, Sterling Archer's voice can't help but come out at you from every line and his arrogance is beautifully evident, even from the title, where Archer makes it clear that he makes his own rules in life, and the use of punctuation isn't necessarily one of them. At first glance, the table of contents reads like a legitimate spy manual, with topics ranging from "tactical driving" to "personal finance." However from the first page, it becomes evident that Archer's tactics are very non-traditional, to say the least, and rely more on convenience, his personal needs, and a good bit of luck.

The book has numerous appendices and is divided into the six most important aspects of being a spy (with several subsections under each of those:

Foreword (by Mallory Archer)
Preface (Archer's explains how HarperCollins approached him to do a book)
Introduction by Archer
1. How to Spy
2. How to Drink
3. How to Style
4. How to Dine
5. How to Women
6. How to Pay for it
Appendix A: Maps
Appendix B: First Aid
Appendix C: Archer's World Factbook
Afterword
Acknowledgements
Selected Bibliography
About the Author

"How to Archer" is fully illustrated with what appears to be all new and original illustrations. Although they don't add too much to the book and some of them may just seem like clip art, given that Archer is an animated show, I do think they are necessary and add to the format (the cover is even a clever homage to The James Bond 007 Annual). I was initially hesitant to read this, as it seems like it's just rehashing some of the same jokes from the show, and I thought they'd be lost on me in a non-visual/audio medium. Not to mention that I think one of the strongest aspects of the show is the interaction between the characters, and I was worried that a 200-page Sterling Archer soliloquy would be annoying. Fortunately, Reed manages to pull it off and I think it works very well in print format. It's just as clever as the show and I actually found myself laughing out loud (which I never do) several times. Archer's attitude perfectly translates to the book, whether it is the disdain he continually brings up for his publishers at HarperCollins (for not allowing him to write a chapter on cobras), or the entire chapter on Unarmed Combat where he discusses a dozen different fighting styles (none of which he has trained in because the classes were too early in the morning). Here are a few excerpts from the book to give you a sense of the style:

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"I had Krieger replace the cyanide in one of my capsules with Binaca, and in the other with Xanax. That way I'm ready for pretty much whatever the day may have in store for me."

"I like to get out to Vegas at least once a year for a heavyweight title bout. Because that's basically like the Oscars for hookers."

"I could not (well, chose not to) attend hapkido training, but I think Steven Seagal holds a ham-flavored belt in it. So if you ever need to fight Marlon Brando's fatter, more ponytailed doppelgänger, just call Steven Seagal and ask him how he would go about it. I just assume he would eat his opponent while growling 'nom nom nom, I was in the CIA, nom nom nom...'"
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"How to Archer" is a very nice companion to the show and I think they did about as well on it as they could. There may not be anything particularly revelatory for fans, but for the viewer who isn't satisfied with just getting Archer on their TV, it's a welcome addition.

Easter Egg Edit: The book includes a recipe for "Eggs Woodhouse," which you can see Archer eating at the beginning of season 3, episode 7.

If you enjoy the show, obviously buy this book. If you don't enjoy the show, you're dumb. Possibly doubly so because you're reading comments from people that obviously love the show. Go knit yourself a pie or something.

As pitch-perfect as this book is for capturing the tone of H. Jon Benjamin (really, how can you read this WITHOUT hearing his voice as Sterling Archer in your head?), the only thing better would be if they would have him release an audio version of the book!!!