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Hope for the Separated: Wounded Marriages Can Be Healed

Hope for the Separated: Wounded Marriages Can Be Healed [Kindle Edition]

Gary Dr. Chapman
5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (4 customer reviews)

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Product Description

Product Description

The unfortunate reality is that Christians are separating and divorcing at the same rate as the unbelieving world. But does separation have to mean the end? You may not feel like reconciling. You may not see hope for a reunion. But the biblical ideal for a separated couple is reconciliation. So how do you do it? When doors slam and angry words fly, when things just aren't working out, and even when your spouse has abandoned your trust, there is hope. Hope for the Separated will show you through God's Word that your marriage can be restored. Recognizing that restoration will not happen for everyone, Dr. Chapman also gives insightful advice for those who experience the pain of divorce.


Explores separation as an opportunity for understanding and growth that can lead to the reconciliation of a troubled marriage, and discusses the biblical implications of separation, communication, and love.

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 162 KB
  • Print Length: 142 pages
  • Publisher: Moody Publishers (1 Jan 2005)
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
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  • Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #256,860 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Answer to Prayer 6 Jan 2011
By Gordon
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
This Book Help me to Understand my Marrage Breakdown, I was able to Take what the book was saying and apply it to my Life, I have went on to read more Books and this was the first ever book I have read from Start to finish I am now finished a second Book, So This book will Help anyone going throgh Marrage Difficult Times, Its a Good starting Point and a well worth the money enjoy it.

Hope for the Separated: Wounded Marriages Can Be Healed (Chapman, Gary)

Stuart McRobbie (Ayr)
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great book with great advice 16 July 2013
By Steve
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
This book does exactly what the title says. It does give hope for the separated. It remains to be seen if my wounded marriage will be healed, but whatever the outcome, I will never regret reading this book.
It has helped me through some very low times. Yes - it is backed up by scripture, but even if you are not a Christian, this book makes sense.
I would recommend this to anyone who is trying to save their marriage. It is not magic. It gives no guarantees, but it does give hope. Where there is hope there is life and although the road towards reconciliation may be a very long and difficult road, after reading this, you will know it is the right road to pursue.
Good luck.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars What an amazing book 19 July 2011
This book was bought for me by a friend, and I can whole-heartedly recommend it. I'm very oppposed to Christian books which offer a '3 simple steps to guaranteed transformation' approach, but that really isn't what this book is. The pain of separation is very real, and this book honestly and practically deals with topics such as 'what if they don't want to reconcile', 'what if I don't love them anymore', 'what about abuse', 'what if we get divorced' and 'what about affairs'? It doesn't promise any easy solutions or magic results, but is biblical, straight-forward and God is currently using it to guide me through a very dark time. I couldn't recommend it any more highly.
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5.0 out of 5 stars An Excellent book 18 May 2014
By Ibby
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
This is one of Dr Chapman's best books on this subject. I found it very helpful, realistic and it brought me closer to God. Dr Chapman is a great author who writes with such sincerity and depth on every subject he authors. I cannot praise this book enough and I am already telling others about it. I highly recommend it and can guarantee that if you are going through the sad experience of separation and a spouse who is not wanting reconciliation, this book will help you through this difficult time and will turn your eyes firmly on the One who can heal all wounds. Buy it, give it as a gift and keep it as a reference book.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on (beta) 4.6 out of 5 stars  78 reviews
91 of 92 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars WOW! TALK ABOUT A WAKE UP CALL! 13 Oct 1998
By A Customer - Published on
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!! This book was so moving, insightful and eye opening that I read it ~three times~ over the course of one weekend. Gary Chapman truly gives you hope when you feel there is none. Its message is that separation can lead to a restored, enriched, growing marriage and the book shows you how. The part that hit home the most with me was that you don't have to be a slave to your past behaviors, you CAN change.
90 of 93 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars It was very eye opening for me 21 Dec 2004
By Amazon Customer - Published on
I read this book thinking that it would have all of the answers for getting him back. In reading it, I realized that getting him back would be pointless.

He has to want to work things out. - It reminded me of Exodus with Moses and Pharoah. Pharoah's heart was hard and he would not let the people of Israel go.

Chapman states that just because something is God's will, He did give human beings free will, so they may decide to go against God's will.

I like how Chapman backs up his books with Scripture. Using the book as a guide, I was able to note some of the faults I'd made in the relationship, and some that I've made since.

I would like to seek reconciliation, but he as to want it to. In the end, he may decide that he would much rather part, and that is something that I'm going to have to accept.

Chapter 6 - Long Distance Love

This chapter takes 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 and breaks it down. Each section of this chapter is one of the characteristics of LOVE from Paul's letter the the people of Corinth. Seeing it broken down makes it much easier to digest.

Chapter 8 - How Do I Handle The Loneliness

Fellowship with others!

Chapter 10 - If Your Spouse Returns

I thought that this sounded a little idealist. Chapman said to call, but I tried email. Either way, he can choose to listen to the voicemail or deleted. With email, he can choose to read it or delete it.

Using the other information that Chapman gives in steps toward reconciliation, I strongly recommend seeing a pastor at your church or a Christian counselor. A non-Christian counselor will be of little benefit if you are working toward a Christ-centered relationship.

Chapter 11 - If You Spouse Demands Divorce

This chapter was difficult to read because I was going through the "what if" in my head. It's not what I want to think about, but I have to at least acknowledge that it is a possibility.

Chapter 12 - Facing the Future

Jesus said, "Give us this DAY our DAILY bread." In Exodus, God only allowed the people to gather enough manna for one day. Plan your day. (In another book, "The Love Languages of God", he mentions a woman whose husband left her, but each morning she gives the day to God. She isn't crying over her husband, she's celebrating her life.)

Sometimes, you've done all you can do, and you just have to leave the rest up to God.
92 of 99 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars If only all marital crisis could be solved this easily... 22 Jan 2004
By "britgam" - Published on
I bought this book because of the word hope that appears so boldly on the cover. While there are some nuggets of Biblical and practical truths,I can't help but question the simplicity of the adviced shared. Marital separations and crisis are usually the result of many factors. For a once loving spouse to reject the other and totally walk out of the marriage, takes years and layers of problems. The suggestion of this book is to show love to the rejector. Then after showing this love, resolute in your mind that you want to reconcile. Call up the spouse that has hurt you beyond words,betrayed your absolute trust in him and left you to take care of all of life's situations by yourself and ask him for a "healing" dinner date?!?!?
If you want a book that truly gives HOPE and a Biblical gameplan for enduring a separation and restoring a marriage read "Love Must Be Tough" by James Dobson. I refer to it daily and it gives me HOPE and reassurance each time. I also like the fact that it addresses other causes of marital crisis besides extra marital affairs.
If you can totally pinpoint the reason for your separation and that reason is the only factor in the crisis, then this book and the "healing dinner date" will probably be of great encouragement to you. If the reasons lie deeper, seek out a copy of "Love Must Be Tough".
36 of 39 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing book. 24 April 2000
By A Customer - Published on
Our family is experiencing four separated couples at this time. I have never seen any book so much on target! I hope every separated person reads it three or four times--and makes it their constant guide. It is so true & so scriptural it is a beacon of light in our confused culture where marriage is so very hard. There should be very few marriages that would not be transformed by following the advice in this book.
44 of 49 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A marriage saver 4 Sep 1999
By A Customer - Published on
Dr. Chapman's book was truly a blessing from God for our marraige. I highly reccommend this book to anyway who is having maritial difficulties or considering divorce. He illustrates a scripture based wasy to give you hope, make changes, love, and save your marriage..
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Remember, the surest road to failure in life is to follow your feelings. Your greatest happiness is in doing what is right, not in following your emotions. &quote;
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We waste our time and energy when we ponder what might have been:“If I had . . .” or “If he/she had . . .” We must simply admit failure to ourselves, God, and our spouses. Accept God’s forgiveness, forgive yourself, and trust that your spouse will do the same. Beyond that, you cannot deal with the past. You must concentrate on the future, for it is in your hands to shape. &quote;
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The third guidepost is Divorce will not lead to personal happiness. &quote;
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