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His Needs Her Needs: Building an Affair-proof Marriage
 
 
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His Needs Her Needs: Building an Affair-proof Marriage [Paperback]

Willard F. Harley
3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
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Product details

  • Paperback: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Monarch Books; 2nd Revised edition edition (18 Mar 2011)
  • Language English
  • ISBN-10: 0857210777
  • ISBN-13: 978-0857210777
  • Product Dimensions: 19.6 x 12.8 x 2.2 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 21,044 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Willard F. Harley
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Product Description

Product Description

'This book will educate you in the care of your spouse,' explains Dr Willard Harley. 'Once you have learned its lessons, your spouse will find you irresistible, a condition that's essential to a happy and successful marriage.' This fresh and highly entertaining book identifies the ten most important needs within marriage for husbands and wives. It teaches you how to fulfil each other's needs. Couples who find each other irresistible during the early years of their marriage may become incompatible if they fail to meet these central needs. According to Dr Harley, the needs of men and women are similar, but their priorities are vastly different. Are you able to identify which of the following needs are his and which are hers? In what order would you place them? Admiration, Affection, An attractive spouse,Conversation, Domestic support, Family commitment, Financial support, Honesty and openness, Recreational companionship, Sexual fulfilment

About the Author

Dr Harley is a clinical psychologist and marriage and family therapist, with over 30 years' experience in marriage counselling. He and his wife Joyce live in Minnesota.

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
17 of 17 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
His Needs, her needs could potentially save your marriage! If things are going wrong the book could certainly point you in the right direction. However, the book has some shortcomings: Firstly it was written over 20 years ago, and some of the ideas and attitudes are getting a bit dated. Secondly, the author demands a lot from his clients and readers - is it realistic to expect couples to spend 15 hours a week together engaged in leisure activities, to spend no time on activites which exclude the other partner and 15 hours a week socialising with their children?

The book identifies behaviour paterns which lead to a successful mariage, but does not explain how these paterns or needs come about or can change.

A good starting point to acheive a successful marriage in ten easy steps, but only a starting point.

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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
This book has helped me to focus my efforts at things which my wife really appreciates. Husbands and wives think differently and have different needs which we sometimes don't appreciate or even see. I highly recommend this book to all couples.
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11 of 12 people found the following review helpful
Well worth reading 20 Nov 2003
Format:Hardcover
This is a good book for couples to read and discuss: you may not agree with it, but it is a good discussion starter.

The marriage counsellor author claims to have found 10 basic needs people have and has sorted them into the top 5 for men and top 5 for women.

My wife and I are certainly not your average couple, if his list is really reliable.

His list of the top emotional needs is:
1. Affection
2. Sexual Fulfilment
3. Conversation
4. Recreational Companionship
5. Honesty and Openness
6. An Attractive Spouse
7. Financial Support
8. Domestic Support [= help with household duties]
9. Family Commitment [= help with child-rearing]
10. Admiration

He points out that a man's top need might be his wife's eighth need. It is important to her, but not nearly as important as it is to him. And vice versa, of course.

Reading the book has made me reflect on how well I meet my wife's needs. This can only be a good thing.

I knocked off a star, because the book is marketed in Christian bookstores, but is hardly a Christian book. But I highly recommend reading and reflecting on what he has to say.

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