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He's Scared, She's Scared: Understanding the Hidden Fears That Sabotage Your Relationships

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He's Scared, She's Scared: Understanding the Hidden Fears That Sabotage Your Relationships (Paperback)

by Stephen Carter (Author), Julia Sokol (Author)

4.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (17 customer reviews)

RRP:	�9.95
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Product details

Paperback: 352 pages
Publisher: Bantam Doubleday Dell Publishing Group (1 Aug 1997)
Language English
ISBN-10: 0440506255
ISBN-13: 978-0440506256
Product Dimensions: 19.6 x 13.8 x 2 cm

Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (17 customer reviews)

Amazon.co.uk Sales Rank: 28,472 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Product Description

Review
" The authors' achievement is that they have gone beyond the obvious avoidance patterns to uncover the more subtle ways men and women sabotage love." -- "Publisher's Weekly"

Synopsis
Stating that the fear of commitment is a difficulty experienced by many contemporary couples, a guide for individuals who are looking for satisfactory relationships offers advice on balancing intimacy and independence. Reprint. Tour. PW.

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	64% buy the item featured on this page: He's Scared, She's Scared: Understanding the Hidden Fears That Sabotage Your Relationships 4.8 out of 5 stars (17) �9.39
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	8% buy Emotional Unavailability: Recognizing It, Understanding It, and Avoiding Its Trap 4.5 out of 5 stars (13) �13.50

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Customer Reviews

17 Reviews

5 star:		(15)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

Average Customer Review

4.8 out of 5 stars (17 customer reviews)

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

25 of 25 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Thank god for this book., 10 Jan 2007

By	N/A "Kia Kaha" (London, UK) - See all my reviews

Wow. This book helped me so much. Since I broke up with my ex I've read about every book under the sun and they've all helped in their own ways but this helped the most. Like just about every other review writer I was left devastated when my ex suddenly and cowardly froze up saying he wasn't sure about me (forcing me to end the relationship) when two weeks before he'd been busy telling me he wanted to marry me! So hard to understand, so hurtful, so confusing. The shock was the worst thing I think. The only conclusion I could come to was that I was hideous and unworthy - until I read this book. It finally helped me to let go, realise he certainly wasn't perfect, and that I was longing for something that never really existed! So if you have been in a similar situation, read this book, get angry, feel better, and let go of the silly sad person who did that to you! (and maybe deal with some of your own commitment issues into the bargain). Can't recommend it enough!

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43 of 44 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars This book explained my ex's behaviour!, 11 Aug 2005

By	Eliza - See all my reviews

This book has helped me so much. When my boyfriend suddenly announced he was moving to another country within days of telling me he was "100% sure he wanted me" (and suggesting we try living together), I was absolutely devastated. His behaviour seemed so odd and cruel, especially during the next several months where he would keep ringing me and tell me how wonderful and perfect I was, act like he was missing me but say that he didn't want to have a relationship with me. If you've had a similarly bizarre experience and are having trouble understanding what went wrong, I really recommend this book - it will help you recover. It also tells you how to spot the signals a commitment phobic person gives out and encourages you to think about your own role in choosing this type of partner so that you can make sure this never happens to you again!

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21 of 21 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Simply Brilliant, 16 Jan 2007

By	Hendrik Strauss (UK) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

I could not for the life of me figure out what was going on in my ex's head and why our relationship wasn't working out. After reading this book I now realise that I have a passive commitment issue. The book describes several different commitment fears. As I read the book I thought, none of these fears were what I was experiencing, and then they discribed the fear that I had and everything all of a sudden clicked. It was like an a-ha moment. It was a fear that I had since I was very young, but which I have been hiding away. It literally sent chills down my spine when I finally figured out what was going on. I now also understand why I was attracted to certain types of partners. I guess you have to face all your fears that you may have otherwise they are going to come back and bite you later on. This book is a must read for anyone who is strugling to make their relationships work.

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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars If only...
If only I'd read this book before my relationship ended with the person I thought was 'the one', maybe then I would have been stronger to have finished it myself. Read more

Published 21 months ago by merlin

5.0 out of 5 stars This book may change your life!
Having read just about every self-help book written about relationships, I cannot recommend this book highly enough. Read more

Published 22 months ago by LadyT

5.0 out of 5 stars No stone left unturned.
This book has provided me with an excellent insight into a recent frustrating and painful relationship. Read more

Published 23 months ago by S. Bennett

5.0 out of 5 stars Absolutely amazing
I found this book fantastic - it refers to 2 main type of person in a relationship - the chaser (passive avoider) and the runner (active avoider). Read more

Published on 13 Jul 2007 by Joti Plahay

2.0 out of 5 stars Emotional Suicide
For me this book wasn't what I was looking for. I was involved with someone who I knew wasn't currently available but was hoping would be in the near future. Read more

Published on 2 Jun 2007 by S. Higgins

5.0 out of 5 stars An eye opener!
My friend bought me this book when my (now ex) partner and I were arguing a lot and I was getting increasingly more frustrated with his behaviour because his actions were not in... Read more

Published on 3 Jan 2006 by kjh973

5.0 out of 5 stars This book saved my sanity!
There are a lot of books now that deal with the issue of 'commitmentphobia' - but this one is the best. Read more

Published on 14 Nov 2005

4.0 out of 5 stars He's scared
I was drawn to this book because of the positive reviews when I was looking for something to give me an understanding of my new boyfriend who clearly has had commitment issues in... Read more

Published on 18 Aug 2005

5.0 out of 5 stars An excellent read
This book was a bit of an eye-opener. The men I chose to be in relationship with always turned out to have commitment issues, but after reading this book I recognised commitment... Read more

Published on 7 April 2005

5.0 out of 5 stars Invaluable
This is mainly written with the intention of giving the rejector guidelines for dealing with their behaviour, but it also gives excellent advice for the rejectee too. Read more

Published on 18 Mar 2004

› See all 17 customer reviews...

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