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Praise for He’s Just Not That Into You:
‘The publishing sensation of the year.’ The Daily Telegraph
‘A new dating book, HJNTIY, is taking Britain by storm… The book cuts to the core of men's behaviour.’ Daily Mail
‘Sometimes an idea for a new book is so blindingly obvious that we think we should have written it ourselves. The concept behind He's Just Not That Into You is simple but speaks universal truth about the excuses men come up with to fob off women.’ Daily Express
‘This book, by the relationship consultants on Sex and the City, will be something of a Godsend, as it aims to make life easier for women who want to get past the crappy get-out lines fellas use. It's wickedly hilarious, and it's sure to turn you into a stronger, better-equipped gal!’ OK magazine.
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If you are not happy with any aspect of your boyfriends behaviour, then the answer is that he is simply 'not that into you'. This goes for everything and no matter at what stage you are into the relationship. Whether he cheats or simply forgets to call you, all is defined as equally bad behaviour, showing that he is 'not that into you' and the books solution is to dump him and find someone who shows you on a daily basis how much he loves you. Greg's definition of this is that he should be showering you with gifts and writing poetry and generally be perfect in every way.
Yes, it might be pretty obvious that he is not that keen if you had just started dating someone who wasn't calling or making much effort. But if you are already in a serious realtionship and it happens, there could be a whole number of reasons and the sensible thing would be to talk to him about it!
Neither women nor men are so perfect and this book scarcely touches on fundamental factors that make relationships work such as communication, the ability to compromose, compatibility, commitment etc. This book implies that it is up to him to put in all the effort. All the female seems to be required to do is to lavish the attention and read his signals to decide whether or not he is 'into you' and therefore whether you should continue with him or not.
Relationships take work from both sides. How our partner treats us and behaves in the relationship is significant and it is important that we are aware of this and don't make compromises on what is truly unacceptable to us but it is really unrealistic, as this book suggests, to expect our partner to behave perfectly all the time.
What is of value here, apart from the humour, is that we should set standards for ourselves and be aware of what is important to us and what we are willing to compromise on and not.
However, there are far more useful books written by relationship experts who know what they are talking about.
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