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I Hate You Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline Personality
 
 
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I Hate You Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline Personality [Mass Market Paperback]

Jerold J. Kreisman , Hal Straus
4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (34 customer reviews)

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Product details

  • Mass Market Paperback: 224 pages
  • Publisher: Avon Books; Reprint edition (1 Feb 1991)
  • Language English
  • ISBN-10: 0380713055
  • ISBN-13: 978-0380713059
  • Product Dimensions: 17 x 10.7 x 2 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (34 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 39,493 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Product Description

Product Description

People with Borderline Personality Disorder experience such violent and frightening mood swings that they often fear for their sanity. They can be euphoric one moment, despairing and depressed the next. They show symptoms such as: a shaky sense of identity; sudden violent outbursts; oversensitivity to real or imagined rejection; brief, turbulent love affairs; frequent periods of intense depression; eating disorders, drug abuse, and other self-destructive tendencies; an irrational fear of abandonment and an inability to be alone. For years BPD was difficult to describe, diagnose, and treat. But now, for the first time, Dr. Jerold J. Kreisman and health writer Hal Straus offer much-needed professional advice, helping victims and their families to understand and cope with this troubling, shockingly widespread affliction.

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Customer Reviews

34 Reviews
5 star:
 (14)
4 star:
 (13)
3 star:
 (5)
2 star:    (0)
1 star:
 (2)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
4.1 out of 5 stars (34 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

77 of 78 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars This book helps you understand yourself as a borderline., 17 Nov 1998
By A Customer
This review is from: I Hate You Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline Personality (Mass Market Paperback)
I suffered from tremendous anger, and didn't know why until I read this book. This book helped me understand why I was always so angry and couldn't control it. I just thought I was a physco. I really was depressed and afraid and that scared me. I now know what I suffer from, and that I'm not alone. I always felt alone, like a crazy person. Now I have some hope, and can face my self and others. This book described me to the T. I recommend this book to everyone suffering inside and notsure why. I was emotionally and physically abused by my father for years, now I as an adult I can startto recover. Please read this book, if you think you could possibly have BPD. Also read this book if youthink you have a loved one with BPD.Because they need your help. It helped me, and it can help you.
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16 of 16 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Worth reading..., 11 Aug 2007
By 
This review is from: I Hate You Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline Personality (Mass Market Paperback)
I'm diagnosed BPD & contrary to much of the opinion here i DID find this book , for the most part, helpful.

Yes, it is written as though aimed at family, friends, colleagues etc but that doesnt mean it isn't useful for Borderlines as well. In fact i can accept some of the harsher realities of my Personality better when read as though in the third person as it is equally as informative but much less condemning that having the author tell YOU how wonky YOU are.

The book contains many, many case studies & real life accounts of Borderlines which i always find interesting - especially when you read how these people have found ways to deal with their behaviours & thus improve their relationships.

Contrary to one opinion here i think the book does give hope for recovery - i'm not sure BPD can ever be called cured but i believe we can certainly learn the skills needed to recover & lead much more fulfilling lives. This book details the SET principle - though this is something to be used by those dealing with Borderlines, not really Borderlines themselves.

I agree the book is showing its age, it makes no mention of modern therapeutic practices such as DBT in the treatment of BPD and the pharmacotherapy section is pretty outdated now too.

However i would recommend this book solely on its section regarding coping and dealing with the Borderline, it explains why we behave how we do & how best to deal with us when we are being difficult. I imagine there is more thorough literiture on dealing with us out there but this is a good start.

To sum it up in a nutshell... outdated but still worth a read.
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72 of 75 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars Information in this book is too old, 20 Aug 1999
By A Customer
This review is from: I Hate You Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline Personality (Mass Market Paperback)
I agree that this book is well written, but I, as someone with borderline personality disorder, believe that when this book was written, treatment for the disorder was not establised in an organized way. I think this book writes about the disorder as if there is no hope for those who have the disorder. I know that is isn't author's fault. When the book was written, it was probably true that there was nothing to help individuals with the disorder. I admit that this book gives me a good understanding about the disorder, but I am concerned that someone thinks there is no hope if you are diagnosed with the disorder. In terms of treatment and therapy, what the book is telling us is no longer true today. The borderline personality disorder is treatable today.
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