"Perhaps the smelliest trash can of a film in cinematic history but that's not the point. Vegas, dykes, feathers and crass dialogue. A movie mud bath of delectable sin."
"This was a big exploitation hit in the Seventies hit. But has immatured into a very unPC camp classic. Then again any film with Faye starts off camp and grows into a circus."
"Is this really some kind of anti-fascist techno fable about a future capitalist Hitler Youth destroying the environment? Who knows? It's got big spiders, tight uniforms and boobs."
"Actually this is a wonderful, low budget, low class slice of West Yorkshire's dirtiest. If it were set in Marseille, film critics would rave about it. Beware though, you may end up fancying the girls."
"Was anyone born legitimately in any Catherine Cookson novel? High production values applied to utter tosh. Spot the Brit acting talent who don't mention this on their CVs."
"First in an endless run of bonkbusters disguised as war drama. How did we ever lick Hitler if we never got out of bed? Perhaps Jennifer Ehle's twin turrets knocked them out. Narf, narf!"
"Well worth a wet afternoon with the curtains closed if only for the lines: "You must really love animals." "Only if it gets cold enough." And oh I forgot Dan Marino's acting."
"How can the leads steam up Rome with their off-screen romance yet generate so little heat on it? Po-faced performance from Burton offset by Rex Harrison seemingly extracting the urine in his scenes"
"A plot holed below the waterline but hey there's chases, sexy Jeanne Tripplehorn and Dennis Hopper enjoying himself. Mad Max was just as bad (or good) as this."
"Oversteamed attempt at classic film noir. Ted Danson's wig, Mickey Rourke before he went bad but most of all Kathleen Turner. Now looks like my mum. There's guilt for you."
"Spader is a widow, trashy waitress Sarandon cheers him up in a special way. All sorts of mixed-up teenage guilt for those who ever fancied their mates' mums."