Most Helpful Customer Reviews
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11 of 12 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Hits The Bullseye, 18 May 2007
This book shocked me with its great advice for women. It really has a different angle and logically explains why much of what women do to get the right guy doesn't work. I bought it because I was stuck in an airport due to snow and needed something to read. It was by a comedian, so I expected it to be funny, but, even though it said it had good advice for men and women, I didn't think it would have any for women. I was very wrong.
This book works on every level. The storytelling is intriguing and hilarious. We empathize with Ian as he goes from nice to guy to frustrated guy to cool guy to outright jerk to cool guy, again. He shares with us - some times offensive with vividness - his thoughts and actions, and how those thoughts and actions humorously resulted in him screwing up everything with some woman. But he learns several things from each story, highlights them, then puts them to use in another story, getting a little further to figuring we women out along the way, until we are putty in his hand and he wakes up one day to realize that he is abusing the putty.
For guys or girls, this is a must-read. Period. For men, Ian teaches you how to flirt and why it's important, how to develop a sense of humor and confidence, what "being mysterious" to women really means, and on and on. For women, he offers advice both by putting us in his head and by giving it straight out, without holding punches. Like I said, it does get graphic in places, but that just makes the stories funnier and the book more honest. It's not as bad as most PG-13 movies these days or anything like a CSI episode, and none of it is violent.
Ian offers women advice by writing things like, "Your friends' opinions should never carry more weight than your own." I think a lot of women let their friends' opinions dictate much of what they do, even more so than their own opinion does. "Many women mistake what they wish they wanted with what they want, which screws them up a lot." How many times have you said you wanted a smart, nice guy but keep falling for dumb jerks? He goes on to talk about ways to break this habit. "Women forget their audience when going out to meet men. Much of what they do and wear is to stay in the favor of other women, not for men." He tells about how he's often heard women out at a bar, upset some girl is talking to a guy they want to talk to, say things like, "I can't believe he's talking to her. I mean, look at those shoes." "No guy, ever in the history of humankind, has ever said, 'Wow, look at her. She's beautiful. She has a great rack, sweet smile, she's pretty, seems conversational and laughs a lot. Too bad about those shoes. Shall we head some place else, guys?" "Remember your audience is men, not women," Ian advises. He says the best thing a woman could wear to meet a good guy to date is tight jeans, a fitting top, and a smile. After reading that I realized that almost all my married friends and I met our husbands while we were looking what we thought was our worse, like tight jeans and a t-shirt! He has all sorts of good advice like this.
I can't say enough good things about this book. It has it all. Great advice, funny stories, and is a quick, easy read. No psychological mumbo-jumbo to sift thru.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Be Careful What You Wish For, 9 May 2007
Since the beginning of time women have wanted to know what goes on in men's minds. Well Ian Coburn gives it to us. Boy does he give it to us. "I wanted to take her top off and go to town on her [...] with my tongue." Yikes! No doubt some women will be offended by these types of graphic descriptions that occur in several places throughout the book, but I found it refreshingly honest and, in the spirit of honesty, somewhat arousing. I wanted to know and now I do. Having been a waitress and bartender throughout and right after college, I especially found his chapter on the hospitality industry and dating to be right on. We don't love you guys just because we bring you beer! Kudos to Ian for having the guts to tell it like it is, not just with the descriptive desires of his mind but also with very personal things, like graduating college still a virgin. I don't think many guys would admit to that. Mostly, Ian is honest with his hilarious, always disastrous escapades with women. It does indeed seem like God is a woman and she is against him. I laughed out loud throughout the entire book as I kept thinking "Oh no, please don't...don't...don't...oh, you idiot!" A remarkable thing happens to Ian, though. His disasters teach him things about women; which he succinctly reviews after each chapter. In a few years he goes from dating dud to dating stud. Actually, he becomes a complete jerk, getting laid at will and even hooking up with twins. Later he realizes it and corrects himself, finding that all important balance he recommends. The whole story of his growth is quite intriguing and as a woman I could see our role in creating this beast, with some of the games and frustrations we play on men.
There is lots of great insight in this book for both men and women. Ian talks about why men like younger women - not because of their younger looks but because they are more lively and less skeptical than older women, many of whom have wasted years trying to force one boyfriend be who they want him to be instead of just accepting that he isn't that guy and moving on to find the right one; he tells younger women to avoid that and older women to be more lively and less skeptical, so that they will be approachable to guys. That women are not good communicators (that I felt was not true until I read his explanation - women are in touch with their emotions and know what's bothering them, but they don't communicate it well, oftentimes just yelling, "If you don't know what's bothering me, I'm not going to tell you!" three weeks after it bothers us. Men communicate well, they just don't know what their feelings are a lot or what is bothering them. That actually is very true.) 'It's a woman's perrogative to change her mind' really means women don't want to be accountable for a decision in the first place. It goes on and on, literally full of advice, all woven into these hilarious stories. It is a must-read, hands down. Just be ready for some graphic details. I look forward to reading Ian's advice for women on Lifetime's website starting in June.
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Couldn't Put It Down, 28 April 2007
Every city has dozens of local crappy newspapers no one ever heard of. Yesterday when the Days Inn I was staying at ran out of papers I found myself on a Chicago street picking up a handful of these bad papers. (I don't think I'll stay at a Days Inn again. No papers, no room service, and my Internet in the room doesn't work.) I found ones with such clever titles as The Buzz and WASSUP! They had such intelligent articles where they interview animals and other dumb ideas. The column Lunch Is Not A Date caught my eye, though, by comedian Ian Coburn. It actually surprised me by being funny and very well written and having very good dating advice. Mr. Coburn apparently had a book out so I went to the bookstore across the street to see if I could get a copy. They had several and I picked one up. My plan was to read a chapter or two before bed then the rest on the plane tomorrow. 3 1/2 hours later I finished the book and went to sleep. I could not put it down. You can't help but keep reading as you wonder what Mr. Coburn is going to do next? What big comedian or celebrity is he going to meet next? What funny stupid thing is going to happen with the next women he's after?
This book is hard to review because it works on every level. It's got great dating screw up stories from Mr. Coburn's late twenties all the way back to his highschool and college days that make you laugh aloud. It works as actual literature with Mr. Coburn being a very intriguing character with lots of conflict, character arc, and plot. He does a great job of putting you in his footsteps while he tells you his thoughts and actions and reactions to women. You also learn alot about the life of a traveling comedian. Sometimes you feel very empathetic and you relate to every situation except for the ones you haven't had the luck of being in like a threesome with twins, who are blond young hotties at that. Then there's all the dating advice and even some sex advice, all of which is fresh, original and insightful. The book is an easy read with an edgy style. It just works on every level. I went back to the bookstore this morning and picked up a few more copies for my nephews and nieces in college. They'll love it. I agree this book will be big or at least it should be. Be warned it does get graphic in spots but that's what keeps it so honest and makes it even funnier.
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