Product Description
This sensitive and biblically oriented book offers a roadmap for bereaved spouses on the journey through grief to resolution. Excellent for pastors, too.
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45 reviews
161 of 179 people found the following review helpful
Beware - Punishing Theological Views
18 July 2006
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
My husband had only been gone for a handful of days when I ordered this book. I read all the reviews here and thought that the "religious" aspect would somehow be acceptable, perhaps very helpful. I was stopped dead in my tracks when I read the following:
"At its very nature death is demonic, and you cannot explain the demonic. Death happens. It is not really God's fault, nor yours, nor that of your spouse. Death is the devil's calling card."
Are you kidding me? I lost my husband! He died! In the context of searching for spiritual understanding, the idea that the devil is responsible for my beloved husband's death is absurd. Even if the practical, therapy half of this book might be helpful...it is made null and void in my mind by allowing such utterly nonsensical and antiquated thinking to prevail.
I quote further:
"Lazarus will come storming from the tomb. Death can't hold him back with the power of Christ on his side. Jesus is weeping because sin has broken this world, and death is a symbol of that brokenness. Even though he has the power to fix it, Jesus grieves."
Am I to believe that my husband's death is punishment for "original sin"? The message here is that we, "man", are the cause of the curse of death, through sin we have brought death upon ourselves and only at the second coming of the Messiah will we be "resurrected".
If these ideas bring comfort to those who grieve the loss of a spouse, then this is a good book to read. I write this only as a warning to those who might have different "religious", spiritual or "Christian" beliefs, or those who may be seeking spiritual guidance. The opinions set down in this book can be very discomforting and offensive.
"At its very nature death is demonic, and you cannot explain the demonic. Death happens. It is not really God's fault, nor yours, nor that of your spouse. Death is the devil's calling card."
Are you kidding me? I lost my husband! He died! In the context of searching for spiritual understanding, the idea that the devil is responsible for my beloved husband's death is absurd. Even if the practical, therapy half of this book might be helpful...it is made null and void in my mind by allowing such utterly nonsensical and antiquated thinking to prevail.
I quote further:
"Lazarus will come storming from the tomb. Death can't hold him back with the power of Christ on his side. Jesus is weeping because sin has broken this world, and death is a symbol of that brokenness. Even though he has the power to fix it, Jesus grieves."
Am I to believe that my husband's death is punishment for "original sin"? The message here is that we, "man", are the cause of the curse of death, through sin we have brought death upon ourselves and only at the second coming of the Messiah will we be "resurrected".
If these ideas bring comfort to those who grieve the loss of a spouse, then this is a good book to read. I write this only as a warning to those who might have different "religious", spiritual or "Christian" beliefs, or those who may be seeking spiritual guidance. The opinions set down in this book can be very discomforting and offensive.
40 of 42 people found the following review helpful
Excellent--Even if you only read half
5 May 2002
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
If the Christian scripture approach does not fit with your views on God and religion (it does not mine), don't let that discourage you from buying this book. The psychologist portions alone are excellent. I am not yet on "the other side" of grief, but I'm starting to see glimmers of what the other side will be like. I'm cautiously optimistic, and this book reinforces that optimism. The psychologist's entries give a wonderful, hopeful view of what's possible in starting anew. It helps assuage any lingering guilt you may feel about starting over. A central concept within is that to get to the other side, you must face your grieving head-on and not simply expect time to do the job for you. The book offers prompts for writing exercises that will help you to face and resolve issues in your grieving. It's hard to find the time to write, especially if you've still got children at home, but whatever you can do will help. Here's a motivating quote from the book: "Do not waste your life on what might have been. Deal with the grief. Deal with it now so you can get on with your life." In the early weeks, I wasn't ready to "get on"; instead, I was "holding on." That's normal, as is the change I'm now feeling towards moving on. Grief is strange, and different books and approaches help at different times. When you are ready to think about moving forward to the next chapter in your life, this book will give you the encouragement you need as well as guidance to help you to the other side.
12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
Getting to the Other Side of Grief
20 Jan 2002
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
What a wonderful and comforting book. It has touched on almost every feeling and concern I am having even though it has only been 6 weeks after loosing my husband of 23 years. I was able to feel comforted and assured by each chapter. The "Pastor Says" sections gives scripture to point the way and the "Psychologist Says" helps you realize all the feelings you have are okay and normal. Blending the knowledge from both aspects was so helpful. The fact that both authors have lost a spouse and know first hand the grief process shows through in this book.
The authors have Blended both the spiritual and the emotional aspects into one very special book.
The authors have Blended both the spiritual and the emotional aspects into one very special book.
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Popular Highlights
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We needed to grieve the death of our hopes and dreams before we could begin to build again.
Highlighted by 13 Kindle users
When your spouse dies, you grieve for at least three different reasons: loss of a spouse, loss of control, and disappointment with God.
Highlighted by 7 Kindle users
We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same. I)on Juan, Journey to Xhan
Highlighted by 5 Kindle users
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