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Fruitbasket from Hell (Alex Cheradon #1.1) [Kindle Edition]

Jason Krumbine
1.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)

Print List Price: £9.21
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Book Description

Steven Raines (you know, the man who made billions making an operating system that out-Microsoft-ed Microsoft?) has hired Alex Cheradon (private investigator) to look for his missing daughter. Good news: it's a million dollar payday. Bad news: she may be a Satanist hell bent on bringing the Devil to Earth.

The dead bodies are piling up. Vampires are crawling out of the woodwork. And there's something named Pookie that's lurking around the corner.

Breathtakingly paced, the jokes and wisecracks fly fast as Alex races against the clock to save the day.

This is Book 1 in the Alex Cheradon Series.

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Other books in the Alex Cheradon Series:

VOLUME 1-
Fruitbasket from Hell (Alex Cheradon #1.1)
A is for Amnesia, B is for Bullet (Alex Cheradon #1.2)
Little People, Big Crimes (Alex Cheradon #1.3)

VOLUME 2 -
One Time Only (Alex Cheradon #2.1)
Welcome to Crazytown (Alex Cheradon #2.2)
Odd Man Out (Alex Cheradon #2.3)
Full Moon, Half Wits (Alex Cheradon #2.4)
One Tomb Short of a Graveyard (Alex Cheradon #2.5)

VOLUME 3
Lucky Dogs (Alex Cheradon #3.1)
Everything's Coming Up Aces (Alex Cheradon #3.2)
The House Always Wins (Alex Cheradon #3.3)

Product Description

About the Author

Jason Krumbine loves to write! He's happily married and lives in Manhattan, NY where he enjoys reading in Central Park, going to movies and discovering new stand-up comedians. You can connect with Jason at either his website, www.jasonkrumbine.com, Facebook, Twitter (@jasonkrumbine) or good ole' fashion email onestrayword@gmail.com. He's always up for a talk about the newest Star Trek movie or what's happening in the world of comic books and TV.

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 1551 KB
  • Print Length: 357 pages
  • Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
  • Publisher: One Stray Word (4 Dec. 2013)
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B001TDKPJI
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Enabled
  • Enhanced Typesetting: Not Enabled
  • Average Customer Review: 1.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #393,239 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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More About the Author

Jason Krumbine is the author behind the pulse pounding, wisecracking Alex Cheradon Series, the high concept Christian fantasy "Heaven's Superhero", and the tongue-in-cheek paranormal romance "A Graveyard Romance." He can be reached at jasonkrumbine.com, onestrayword@gmail.com or on twitter @jasonkrumbine.

Customer Reviews

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1.7 out of 5 stars
1.7 out of 5 stars
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
Format:Kindle Edition
The book has a reasonably good plot, an interesting take on the world in a fantasy genre.
However lines like "Woman had nerves of steal" and "you're an jerk" really really spoilt my enjoyment of the book as I found I was looking out for spelling and grammar mistakes instead of paying attention to the plot. I know I'm not the world's greatest when it comes to grammar, but I don't ask people to pay to read my words. I'm not entirely sure how kindle publishing works, but if there is a publisher or an editor they should be ashamed of themselves.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I initially wrote a much longer review, praising the qualities of a good, well-finished book and compring that to this. Frankly, it ended up sounding too much like a rant so I'll trim it to just this:

I got to 19% of the way through the book when I encountered the phrase that sums up this tome perfectly - and I quote: "Okay, that's it, for the good of mankind I must burn this horrendous book." I took it as an omen - personally I suspect that the author knew exactly what the book was like at this point and subconciously actually put it into the book. I can endure this torture of the English language no more, and have moved on. The premise held promise, but I can only assume that the lure of riches from readers all too ready to part with their case was too great for those responsible to actually bring the novel up to a professional level of quality. It's sad to note that the free archives out there have more polished work by superior authors.

This book gets one star because the scoring system alows for no less. I hope the author improves with age.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Chaotic plot , spelling and grammar 18 July 2011
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
You get the feeling that this author has some great books coming but needs to stop and think. And get a good editor. As another reviewer mentioned, the spelling and grammar are lamentable even though spell check is a universal function. I found the plot too jerky and over-wrought. I simply could not read it
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)
Amazon.com: 3.3 out of 5 stars  24 reviews
14 of 14 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A fun read 2 Nov. 2004
By Chris Spears - Published on Amazon.com
Format:Paperback
Okay, so, it begins with this mysterious man coming to Alex Cheradon and offering him a million dollars to find his missing daughter. While in the process of doing so everything seemed to turn upside down and inside out for the main character. It's one of those, anything can go wrong and will go wrong-type stories.

The author throws a lot of stuff at the reader, from crazy ex-partners to scottish convenience story clerks(Easily one of the funniest bits in the book). It's got a bit Dean-Koontz-on-crack type feel to the story line. The author tried to tell his story in a very non-linear fashion, which would have worked better in a movie, but in the book caused some moments of confusion, but it didn't detract from the story too much. The overall story line of the book was actually pretty good with some well developed twists in the plot(See, crazy ex-partner and scottish convenience store clerk.). The main character, Alex, is, I'll admit, a little annoying, but shows potential to grow and the story leaves us open for a sequel, which I would definitely read(I hear rumor it's going to be titled something along the lines of A LIFE LESS FRUITY.).

I would say it's a great Halloween read, but, whoops, Halloween passed, so I'll say it's great Christmas read. I definitely recommend this book.
10 of 10 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Quirky and fun 5 Feb. 2011
By GraceKrispy (MotherLode blog) - Published on Amazon.com
Format:Kindle Edition
Alex Cheradon is a PI. He tries to stay off paranormal cases (vampires and the like), but they seem to find him anyway. His latest case offers him a new twist on Hell on Earth as he's hired to track down the whereabouts of Nevada Raines, daughter of the computer billionaire, Steven Raines. After a run-in with a bloodthirsty vampire, Alex is glad to have a case that put a million dollars immediately in his pocket and wasn't likely to involve the undead. Unfortunately, there's just the little matter of the Satanist cult, a vampire nest, and a little visitor named "Pookie" to contend with. If Alex can stay alive long enough, he just may save the world.

With a certain quirkiness reminiscent of Janet Evanovich's "Stephanie Plum" series, Jason Krumbine has created a bizarre cast of characters: Alex, the Private Investigator who manages to stumble through cases by pure luck, Nicky, the metrosexual secretary who is more interested in clothing choices than cases, Christian, the not-quite-alive ex-partner who seems hell-bent on killing Alex (well, it's not Christian's idea, it's those pesky voices), Angie, the ex who gets hired to be Alex's bodyguard but just may want to kill him herself, and all the wacky clients who hire Alex under false pretenses. The plot is a frenzied and outlandish race as Alex tries to find Nevada in time to save the world from Pookie.

Written like a rambling from someone's brain (complete with frequent and extensive parenthetical comments), the writing style is quirky and somewhat fun at first, but begins to become somewhat grating towards the end. It's difficult to judge the writing style, as the run-on sentences, sentence fragments and oddly formatted sentence structures seem to be created by design, not accident. It's a quick, amusing read, but a bit like being in the brain of someone with an attention disorder. Slightly out of context, there are a few comments that come off as simply racist. I couldn't quite figure out if they were meant to be funny, but they just seemed out of place.

Just compelling enough to keep you reading, "Fruitbasket from Hell" a quick and goofy ride through someone's subconscious.

@ MotherLode blog
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Vampires R Us 19 April 2008
By Fantasy Author Sandy Lender - Published on Amazon.com
Format:Paperback
Poor Alex Cheradon is a private investigator who wants to stop getting cases that involve the paranormal...or at least that involve members of the "other realm" trying to kill him. In "Fruitbasket From Hell," circumstances beyond his control have forced him, his metrosexual assistant/receptionist, and his past girlfriend/Laura-Croft-wannabe bodyguard to take on three cases that involve vampires, satanists, gateways to hell, and an ex-partner who won't die when you throw grenades at him. At the center of it all is the mystery of why Multi-Millionaire Steven Raines has handed Alex a briefcase of sketchy clues, a few threats, and a million dollars to find a daughter who's only been missing a few hours.

Overall, I found Alex to be a likeable and sympathetic character. I enjoyed his stream-of-consciousness narration, but, at times, it became overwhelming. Krumbine's sarcastic tone throughout the novel carried into each character thus became difficult to "stay with" at times. I sometimes found it necessary to set the novel aside to get out of Alex's head. As a testament to Krumbine's story, though, I kept going back to find out how the plot would develop. And, as a testament to Krumbine's ability to use dialogue and character interaction to update the storyline, I never had to re-read sections to remember what had happened. I think one reviewer erroneously referred to this as "non-linear". For an example of an author using a non-linear writing device, pick up John Brunner's "Stand on Zanzibar," (which I also recommend, by the way). For an example of an author expertly using a recap, pick up Jason Krumbine's "Fruitbasket From Hell."

Something else I enjoyed was Krumbine's "play" with sentence structure and references to pop culture in description. For instance, when Alex interrogates a priest, he describes him this way: "Father Pital was a tall, wiry man with a small ring of white hair around his head, kind of like Captain Picard, only Pital's head didn't fill out as much. Which I thought was odd, considering how so many priests think so highly of themselves." When Alex approaches a house where a den of vampires is hiding, he subtly suggests it's not going to be a great experience: "There was a small garden off to the side that looked like God himself had taken offense to its existence."

For readers who can't get past the number of typos and missing words in the third edition (the one I read), this novel will be difficult. Such technicalities pull me out of a story, and that's a shame, because Krumbine has such an intriguing story. But if what you're after is a good, fun, tongue-in-cheek, bloody, shoot-em-up, paranormal mystery, Jason Krumbine delivers all that and more in this book. The tone is light and fast-forward-fun with a surprising body count. It's truly bizarre to get to the end and realize how much blood and gore you've waded through because you've been laughing at so many points along the way...

And as an afterthought, I'm surprised by the pricetag on some of the copies here at Amazon. I picked my softcover up from the author at a festival for $15. Shop wisely.

From Sandy Lender, "Some days, I just want the dragon to win."
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Kept me laughing from begining to end 9 July 2011
By D. Everetti - Published on Amazon.com
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
This was one super funny, but good story. I enjoy reading the supernatural genre and when I read the summary of the story, I was not expecting to laugh so hard or so much. If you like Nelson DeMille's John Corey series, Evanovich's Stephine Plum series, along with the TV show Supernatural you will love this book!!!

Alex Cheradon is a P.I. that stresses that he will NOT take on any case with supernatual overtures, yet that is exactly what happens to the poor fella. Jason Krumbine definetly has a way with words as he paints the reader a vivid picture of who and/or what he is dealing with at the moment, not to mention his own thoughts on each situation.

I was not sure what to expect from a free book and was very pleased with this book. I will be buying more of his books as I am sure they are all just as good. I did read Just Dial 911 and loved it also!!! This book kept me laughing out loud the whole way through. Krumbine does have a way with words. Reccommended for anyone looking to be throughly entertained.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Fruitbasket from Hell 2 July 2012
By babawawa - Published on Amazon.com
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
This book is indeed from Hell. I quit reading after I had finished 28% of the text. I did not laugh or smile once. In fact, his humor is amaturish and boring. An occasional aside of humor in a book is tolerated, but the author felt it necessary to put asides into every paragraph, and often in every sentence. The characters were not interesting and the plot lacked any form. I neither laughed or smiled the whole time I was reading. This book is awful. Period!!
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