- Paperback: 336 pages
- Publisher: Mobius (6 April 2000)
- Language English
- ISBN-10: 0340708581
- ISBN-13: 978-0340708583
- Product Dimensions: 17.5 x 10.9 x 2 cm
- Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (19 customer reviews)
- Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 280,195 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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More About the Author
Product Description
Amazon.co.uk Review
Susan Jeffers, author of the hugely successful Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway and other self-help bibles, brings her attention to bear on children and motherhood. The stereotype that an unhappy adult is created by a bad mother is a fundamentally damaging misconception about just how much responsibility a mother should take for the happiness and success of her offspring, when grown.
Why not fathers? Why assume that adults cannot take responsibility for their own actions? Who says that people are entirely the product of their parenting and not their genetic make-up, or what the author calls their "sphere of being"; that is, the larger circle of their life, such as friends, teachers, media and so forth? Answer? So-called experts, who have no real evidence on which to base their assertions.
Jeffers' book is assertive and aggressive in tone, but then she is setting out to rattle the cage of a belief that has pervaded attitudes to parenting since the Victorian age. It is possible to love your children and not love parenthood. Don't have children if you don't want to--it's a valid choice. Why should the mother always, seemingly automatically, get custody after a divorce?
This is a truly refreshing read for mothers--and indeed fathers--who want to hear a new and distinctive voice on these questions, among those that drone the same old repressive paradigms. --Alison Jardine. Originally published as I'm OK You're a Brat.
Review
". 'BRILLIANT! A brave and revolutionary book that dares to confront many of our long-cherished beliefs about parenthood and parenting' - Susan Forward, author of Emotional Blackmail. 'There is a terrific ring of truth about this book. Encouraging for parents and non-parents alike, it throws a clear spotlight onto what it really means to have a child' - Hester Lacey, Independent on Sunday. 'At last, totally guilt-free parenting! If only l'd had this book sixteen years ago when I started out' - Jenni Murray. 'The self-help guru Susan Jeffers may be on the verge of achieving the impossible: that of winning the admiration of parents far and wide with a seriously politically incorrect book about children' - Serena Allott, Telegraph"
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
10 of 10 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
For those who have struggled with infertility,
By A Customer
This review is from: I'm Okay, You're a Brat: Freeing Ourselves from the Guilt-making Myths of Parenthood (Paperback)
Save yourselves a lot of agony, needles, drugs, emotional pain and money. Having been through the Infertility War ourselves, with no success, we are now trying to come to terms with living without children. This book is great reading for anybody in this space as it is the only book I have seen that gives lots of positives reasons not to have kids. The overwhelming images in society are of the the happy and fulfilled mother. After reading this book you would think it was all just a conspiracy of our DNA! This is the first book I have read that says that parenthood may not be, all it is cracked up to be. This book cheered me up no end and made me realise our situation may have some positives that I can learn to appreciate.
8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Finding parenthood tedious? This is essential reading.,
By A Customer
This review is from: I'm Okay, You're a Brat: Freeing Ourselves from the Guilt-making Myths of Parenthood (Paperback)
If you are finding accepting the life change that is becoming a parent difficult then this book is a must. Refreshingly honest, it pulls no punches but makes you feel you are not alone. Becoming a parent can be an incredibly physically and emotionally draining experience. The last thing you need is to feel guilty if you are finding things hard-going. This is the perfect antidote. I cannot recommend it enough.
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
A positive review from new mother of twins.,
By A Customer
This review is from: I'm Okay, You're a Brat: Freeing Ourselves from the Guilt-making Myths of Parenthood (Paperback)
As a first time mother of 10mth old twins, I can empathise with the vivid descriptions of the day to day physical and emotional slog of raising children. Initially (and rather depressingly) the negative emphasis struck me as dominating Jeffers' thoughts on the subject. However, as I persevered it became obvious that the whole picture of motherhood was being painted, and with humorous passages that made me laugh out loud. I particularly thank Ms. Jeffers for her thoughts on breast feeding, at last someone with a sensible attitude to the issue, that I want to tell every new mother about! Exploding the myths of motherhood she certainly does, and I feel this book should be a compulsory text for teenage children when being educated (are they?) about the decision to have children later in life (I intend to give this book to my children as soon as they hit puberty...). It is perhaps of more use to those still considering parenthood, but it does provide support to parents and 'free us from the guilt' that we do perpetually seem to torture ourselves with.
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