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Free from Lies is a clarion call from one of the great psychological minds of our time.--Stephen Kamsi, Saybrook Graduate School, San Francisco
--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Product Description
An astoundingly moving and perceptive work on how adults can finally overcome the traumas of their childhood, "Free From Lies" is the culmination of a life devoted to healing others. Since "The Drama of the Gifted Child", no one has been more influential than Alice Miller in empowering adults whose lives were maimed emotionally and physically as children. Now she goes further, presenting theories that enhance communication and enable adults to express emotions that have been trapped for years. Practical and perceptive, Miller's work explains what can be expected from therapy, how to identify the causes of pain and why subconscious pain, unaddressed for decades, manifests itself later as depression, self-mutilation, primal inadequacy and chronic loneliness. "Free from Lies" contains excerpts in which a mother learns how to communicate honestly, as well as a trove of Miller's answers to her thousands of readers.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
22 of 25 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover
Alice Miller is a proselytizer for psychotherapy. Without that aspect, her books would be brilliant. Readers are likely to have great difficulty locating a therapist who matches Miller's ideal of an 'Enlightened Witness'. Those who are new to her work may not even be aware of the J.Konrad Stettbacher saga in which Miller effusively recommended his self-help method to her readers only to reject it totally just a few years later (all mention of Stettbacher has been eradicated from current editions of her books). In another change of mind, one chapter from "Paths of Life" has been deleted from the latest edition. Originally subtitled 'Seven Scenarios', the book was billed as fictional stories illustrating various themes. It is now subtitled 'Six Case Histories'. The new Afterword claims the missing chapter was a 'case history' from the start.
In her early books Alice Miller was breaking new ground. In her most recent books she has been going over the same ground again and again. It's as if she knows she has a loyal following of disciples who will buy any book she writes, come what may. "Free From Lies" presents familiar themes from Miller's earlier writings. Part III of "Free From Lies" recycles articles which are available on her website (chapter 15 is based on the readers' letters section). Part IV draws from interview transcripts which also appear on her website. And already there is another book built up from the archive of readers' letters on her website - "From Rage to Courage" (Norton, 2009).
In her early books Alice Miller was breaking new ground. In her most recent books she has been going over the same ground again and again. It's as if she knows she has a loyal following of disciples who will buy any book she writes, come what may. "Free From Lies" presents familiar themes from Miller's earlier writings. Part III of "Free From Lies" recycles articles which are available on her website (chapter 15 is based on the readers' letters section). Part IV draws from interview transcripts which also appear on her website. And already there is another book built up from the archive of readers' letters on her website - "From Rage to Courage" (Norton, 2009).
9 of 10 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase
i find my self in some agreement with previous reviewer - that there is nothing new here.
i am a great fan of alice miller, but i also find some of her views intransigent. this book develops none of her earlier work.
however, i do also disagree with previous reviewer in one respect. Alice Miller did dis-own Stettbacher and reversed her original support for his work. However, I think because of her actual experience she was able to analyse what was wrong with his approach. I think her view was that "regression" therapy without full understanding and support in a proper dialogue can be dangerous - and i agree with her on that. "Its a wise person who changes his/her mind".
i am a great fan of alice miller, but i also find some of her views intransigent. this book develops none of her earlier work.
however, i do also disagree with previous reviewer in one respect. Alice Miller did dis-own Stettbacher and reversed her original support for his work. However, I think because of her actual experience she was able to analyse what was wrong with his approach. I think her view was that "regression" therapy without full understanding and support in a proper dialogue can be dangerous - and i agree with her on that. "Its a wise person who changes his/her mind".
Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)
Amazon.com:
6 reviews
31 of 34 people found the following review helpful
Alice Miller
13 Oct 2009
Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase
Childhood, the base for the rest of our lives... why as parents would we ever choose to make it a cruel base?
It is time to wake up, stop repeating what was done to us, discover new loving ways to treat our children, admit our parents did it wrong and not feel the need in the very same breath to excuse that.
We all have choices in life, we do not have to spank/beat our kids just because it was done to us. We can think for ourselves and realize that hitting a child can NeVeR be right or justified. Alice Miller suggests we think of a giant coming over to us and hitting us over and over... How would you feel? Scared, petrified, humiliated? Yes, all of these things plus more unwanted feelings. Talking and teaching with kindness is so much better in every way. Wouldn't it be great to live in a world where all the people were brought up with love, hugs and kisses, and kindness and when that person did something that was perceived as wrong, that instead of punishment and spanking, got a gentle explanation. The prisons would be empty.
It is time to wake up, stop repeating what was done to us, discover new loving ways to treat our children, admit our parents did it wrong and not feel the need in the very same breath to excuse that.
We all have choices in life, we do not have to spank/beat our kids just because it was done to us. We can think for ourselves and realize that hitting a child can NeVeR be right or justified. Alice Miller suggests we think of a giant coming over to us and hitting us over and over... How would you feel? Scared, petrified, humiliated? Yes, all of these things plus more unwanted feelings. Talking and teaching with kindness is so much better in every way. Wouldn't it be great to live in a world where all the people were brought up with love, hugs and kisses, and kindness and when that person did something that was perceived as wrong, that instead of punishment and spanking, got a gentle explanation. The prisons would be empty.
20 of 21 people found the following review helpful
A powerful survey
16 Sep 2009
Format:Hardcover
FREE FROM LIES: DISCOVERING YOUR TRUE NEEDS is from any who denied that they suffered physical and emotional abuse as children. Former victims can heal by discovering and acknowledging their true history instead of denying it - and this explains why a therapist should become a witness to the survivor of such cruelty rather than the usual neutral therapeutic role. A powerful survey, this is a pick for any general or health lending library.
43 of 51 people found the following review helpful
Not a self-help book
12 Aug 2009
Format:Hardcover
This was the first book by Alice Miller I've ever read and I found it interesting, although according to her very broad definition, most, if not all of us are the victims of physical/emotional/psychological childhood abuse of some sort or other - it definitely made me view my own childhood in a new light.
Unfortunately, about half the book consist of her responses to letters or e-mails she has received, a transcript of a lengthy interview, and what appears to be an autobiographical letter to her daughter and her own mother. - The author had my full attention for the first half of the book but she lost me in the second part.
To sum it up: If you are looking for a "ten steps" kind of book, this is not it. "Free From Lies" will give you an overview of Ms. Miller's views on how deeply childhood abuse affects us as adults. It will encourage you to seek an "empathic therapist" rather than a therapist who confirms the patient's deep-seated conviction that somehow the treatment she/he received from her parents as a child was normal or her/his fault or even deserved. The book will also give you some basic tips as to how to find a suitable therapist.
Save your money and get it from the local library!
Unfortunately, about half the book consist of her responses to letters or e-mails she has received, a transcript of a lengthy interview, and what appears to be an autobiographical letter to her daughter and her own mother. - The author had my full attention for the first half of the book but she lost me in the second part.
To sum it up: If you are looking for a "ten steps" kind of book, this is not it. "Free From Lies" will give you an overview of Ms. Miller's views on how deeply childhood abuse affects us as adults. It will encourage you to seek an "empathic therapist" rather than a therapist who confirms the patient's deep-seated conviction that somehow the treatment she/he received from her parents as a child was normal or her/his fault or even deserved. The book will also give you some basic tips as to how to find a suitable therapist.
Save your money and get it from the local library!
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