First Steps in Parenting the Child who Hurts and over 2 million other books are available for Amazon Kindle . Learn more
£13.95
FREE Delivery in the UK.
In stock.
Dispatched from and sold by Amazon.
Gift-wrap available.
Quantity:1
Trade in your item
Get a £4.12
Gift Card.
Have one to sell?
Flip to back Flip to front
Listen Playing... Paused   You're listening to a sample of the Audible audio edition.
Learn more
See this image

First Steps in Parenting the Child Who Hurts: Tiddlers and Toddlers Paperback – 1 Aug 1999


See all 2 formats and editions Hide other formats and editions
Amazon Price New from Used from
Kindle Edition
"Please retry"
Paperback
"Please retry"
£13.95
£11.15 £11.14

Trade In Promotion


Frequently Bought Together

First Steps in Parenting the Child Who Hurts: Tiddlers and Toddlers + Next Steps in Parenting the Child Who Hurts: Tykes and Teens + Attachment, Trauma and Resilience: Therapeutic Caring for Children
Price For All Three: £42.30

Buy the selected items together


Trade In this Item for up to £4.12
Trade in First Steps in Parenting the Child Who Hurts: Tiddlers and Toddlers for an Amazon Gift Card of up to £4.12, which you can then spend on millions of items across the site. Trade-in values may vary (terms apply). Learn more

Product details

  • Paperback: 128 pages
  • Publisher: Jessica Kingsley Publishers; 2nd ed edition (1 Aug 1999)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1853028010
  • ISBN-13: 978-1853028014
  • Product Dimensions: 17.3 x 0.7 x 24.6 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (24 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 22,076 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • See Complete Table of Contents

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, and more.

Product Description

Review

[Reviewed with Next Steps] 'Combining thorough and pertinent research with practical wisdom drawn from years of personal experience, these books manage the rare accomplishment of being both informed and passionate. They provide a clear, accessible account of contemporary research and theory on the effects of trauma in infancy and childhood, along with a wealth of tested ideas, approaches and techniques for living and working effectively with children who have suffered such trauma... Both volumes should be of immense value to adopters, foster carers, social workers with looked after children, family placement workers and anyone who seeks to improve their understanding of child development and childhood trauma.' -- Adoption and Fostering 'So little adoption research seems rooted in the real world. Now Caroline Archer, an adoptive parent herself, has written two working sourcebooks that seek to provide practical solutions to very practical problems. First Steps looks at adoption of what are described as "tiddlers and toddlers", dealing with everything from building a relationship to dealing with, say, the challenges of insecure attachment. For parents who adopt babies this book will be helpful. It uses popular psychology to make sense of child development theory and intersperses this with practical exercises. These look at life story work, contact with birth families, eating patterns, sleep and the over-riding importance of play. Archer is good here at alerting adoptive parents to those triggers which might re-awaken memories of earlier abuse or neglect... Next Steps deals with "tykes and teens". It looks at a similar range of potential hazards, such as addictive behaviour, sexual acting out and drug and alcohol use, all now, arguably, the birth-right of any parent. Of particular use here is a section called "Principles into Practice" where a range of scenarios is proposed with possible outcomes. These could also serve as training material. Both books are grounded in hard won experience.' -- Community Care 'Primarily aimed at adoptive parents, but of considerable use to foster carers of young children, this publication approaches attachment and developmental issues arising when even the smallest child is in your care. Extremely well researched, it offers practical, sensitive guidance through the dark areas of separation, loss and trauma in early childhood. It reassures that no problem faced as a result of your child's early experiences is insignificant or undeserving of a solution. Neither is the reader patronised by assumptions that some matters should already be common knowledge. Archer sets out purposefully to encourage confidence and thereby to enable enjoyment of the young life in your care, confessing this to be the book she herself would have welcomed 20 years ago.' -- Foster Care 'This book is written by a parent who has direct experience of the difficulties that very young children can present to their new parents. The seven chapters are eminently readable and offer very useful methods of helping to understand and work to alleviate the hurt felt by very young children who have been or are in the process of being transferred to new permanent situations, whether by adoption or fostering. The chapters are not loaded with references for the reader to wade through, although the information is provided at the back of the book, along with a no-nonsense, very understandable glossary of the jargon (which has been kept to a minimum anyway). The style of the writer made me feel able to grasp immediately what she was trying to explain, with the illustrations involving the family of hedgehogs bringing the sensitivity of the content alive for me. The sense of intimacy in the book made me want to read more. It offers new parents and professionals everywhere a practical guide in a delightful, sensitive, and above all, informative way. I thoroughly recommend it and will go out and buy the next companion book "Tykes and Teens".' -- Professional Social Work 'A "must have" book for both adoptive parents and for those professionals who help adoptive families forge new family ties...the author, herself an adoptive parent, addresses a wide variety of very complex topics with a marked sensitivity to the varying needs of children who may have had a wide range of early life experiences. Although in general the text is easy to read and understand, there is a glossary for those who might be unfamiliar with some of the terminology. References are made to well established issues as well as to some of the newer research on the impact of early abuse and neglect on brain development. I particularly appreciated the special focus on identifying abnormal arousal patterns and helping the child with these. Parents and professionals alike will value the specific ideas provided for coping with problem behaviours and for building closer family ties.' -- from the Foreword by Dr Vera Fahlberg

About the Author

Caroline Archer is an adoptive parent. Adoption UK is a registered charity which aims to provide information, support and advice for prospective and existing adoptive parents and long-term foster carers.

Inside This Book (Learn More)
First Sentence
This is a book about you and your adopted little one, or the baby or young child you hope to have. Read the first page
Explore More
Concordance
Browse Sample Pages
Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Index
Search inside this book:

Customer Reviews

3.9 out of 5 stars
Share your thoughts with other customers

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

16 of 17 people found the following review helpful By literature4you on 11 April 2008
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
We were also asked to read this as part of adoption assessment. There's no doubt that there's a lot of useful information, particularly for children who have suffered a particularly rough start in life and anything that helps them is to be supported. However the bit I didn't like was constantly suggesting an approach and then saying (in bold) BUT DON'T DO THIS IF.. I would have found it more helpful to have chapters split out for children who have been subject to different types of abuse or neglect before being adopted or fostered as at least you could read a whole section that might be more appropriate to your child.
Some of the suggestions I just found very odd - e.g putting honey on child's mouth and then licking it off yourself or letting your child streak in the rain? I understand what the author is trying to achieve but I found it a bit off-beat for me.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful By Amstar on 22 Jan 2011
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book does have some good ideas but the author does not execute them at all well. So poorly in fact I even wondered if the book was ever edited. I understand why we were asked to read it as part of our assessment as compared to a lot of the workbooks that our out there it seems to offer a more practical way of parenting but the ideas are so all over the place I am not sure that it will ever be of any real use.
The author flits between simple and non simple language (who has ever called a baby a young human), exclamation marks are everywhere and just when you think she is actually going to give you a piece of advice you can use she tells you to go read another book that will explain it better.
I am not saying don't read this book as if you have to read it for your assessment of course you are going to read it, but just don't let this be the only book you read. We found our social worker a much better resource than this!!!
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
24 of 27 people found the following review helpful By de facto on 1 Sep 2006
Format: Paperback
I'm afraid I have to quite disagree with the previous foster carer who suggested that this book is only useful for those children who have been sexually abused. This is a wonderful book, easy to read, hands-on and parent-friendly. It's intelligently written and backed up with careful research. I cannot recommend it more highly for any adoptive or foster parent. It's a sad fact that today, nearly all children adopted have been through the care system with complex and traumatic histories - they're rarely babies these days. Caroline really understands this and the shock it is to the many parents who are ill-prepared for the pain their child is in.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By brownie on 14 Dec 2011
Format: Paperback
A good book for adoptive parents with many helpful points to help deal with attachments issues and easy to read. Can appear a little negative at the start but don't let this put you off. Great to keep as a reference book for future use.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By M on 18 Sep 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
An excellent way of increasing your knowledge and awareness on this subject. Easy to get into from start to end.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
7 of 8 people found the following review helpful By N. Tarbuck on 28 Mar 2007
Format: Paperback
I agree with the 2nd review i 1st borrowed this book from the library as we are looking into adopting a toddler, and i have to say that this book is fantastic and i am now going to buy it from amazon !It is full of practical advice alot of it is common sense but sometimes when you're in a situation you can't always think of the most straight forward solution, and this book gives lots & lots of great advice.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
6 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Bubble on 28 Jun 2010
Format: Paperback
Overall I think this book is a useful resource, however, you quickly know from how thin the book is that it doesn't go nearly far enough.

Some of the things mentioned in the book, the honey on the mouth, encouraging your children to run around in the rain naked (it's usually cold when it rains); getting a larger bed and having your child sleep in with you, nursing your adopted child (!?!?!) are simply wrong. I would not recommend these things and I don't know anyone that would.

The previous reviewer that said the book should be split to deal with different types of abuse had it right.

I still would recommend this book, but don't switch your brain off and simply take it as how things must be done.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Christina on 16 Feb 2014
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
There are lots and lots of very practical ideas in this book. Many books explain the theory but don't tell you how to apply it, whereas this is more of an activity book. The only thing is that because it's for very young children, it mostly focuses on the positive actions you need to take e.g. how to build attachment, rather than how to manage it when they are on the floor kicking and screaming in a supermarket, without undoing all the good attachment work you have been doing.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again


Feedback