Does Cockshutt Beat Sandy Balls?: And Other Important Questions in the Search for the Best of Everything [Paperback]

Forget top tens. Forget favourite fives. Here's a foolproof system for determining the best of everything.

Have you ever made a list of your favourite five breakfast cereals or the all-time top ten best ever album covers? Do you sometimes find yourself in heated conversations about who was the best children's TV presenter, or which Doctor Who sidekick was the coolest? Have you ever fallen out with someone over the question of who was the world's greatest sportsman (alive or dead)? Now there's an infallible way to find the answers. Welcome to the magic science of bracketology: a foolproof system for determining the best of everything. Whether you're arguing about the best soap opera or the most infectious comedy catchphrase, bracketology shows you how to line up your candidates and then take them through a series of eliminating rounds until you have one clear winner. It creates a world cup contest out of everything and turns opinion into a sport. Does Cockshutt beat Sandy Balls? raises the 101 most burning questions of our era -- from who is the best ever celebrity chef to what is the most stupid dangerous sport -- and gives you the definitive answers. Along the way, it uncovers a series of genuine posers. Is stealing from hotel rooms definitely more fun than cheating on expenses? Is QAT a better Scrabble word than MOXBIB? And is 'Cockshutt’, the name of a small town in Shropshire, inherently more snigger-worthy than ‘Sandy Balls’, a New Forest holiday park? With Does Cockshutt beat Sandy Balls? in your hand, you'll never again have to utter those pathetic and weak words 'it's just a matter of opinion'. Like a latter-day King Solomon, or a taller and less green Yoda, you'll be able to settle every pub argument with self-confidence and wisdom.

Have you ever made a list of your favourite five sandwiches or the all-time top ten worst ever cover versions? Do you sometimes find yourself in heated conversations about who was the best Blue Peter presenter, or which Doctor Who sidekick was the coolest? Have you ever fallen out with someone over the question of what is the most unforgettable sporting moment in history? Now there's an infallible way to find the answers. Welcome to the magic science of bracketology: a foolproof system for determining the best of everything. Whether you're arguing about the best film quotation or the most infectious comedy catchphrase, bracketology shows you how to line up your candidates and then take them through a series of eliminating rounds until you have one clear winner. It creates a world cup contest out of everything and turns opinion into a sport. Does Cockshutt beat Sandy Balls? raises the 99 most burning questions of our era -- from who is the best ever celebrity chef to what is the most stupid dangerous sport -- and gives you the definitive answers. Along the way, it uncovers a series of genuine posers. Is stealing from hotel rooms definitely more fun than cheating on expenses? Is QAT a better Scrabble word than MOXBIB? And is 'Cockshutt’, the name of a small town in Shropshire, inherently more snigger-worthy than ‘Sandy Balls’, a New Forest holiday park? With Does Cockshutt beat Sandy Balls? in your hand, you'll never again have to utter those pathetic and weak words 'it's just a matter of opinion'. Like a latter-day King Solomon, or a taller and less green Yoda, you'll be able to settle every pub argument with self-confidence and wisdom.

Simon Trewin is a literary agent and writer who lives in London. In the course of researching this book, he's discovered that his name is an anagram of 'moist winner', recalled traumatic childhood memories of being thrown out of a Physics class for doing impressions of Dick Emery and tried out 32 kinds of hangover cures in the name of science.