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Product Description
Product Description
If crime is the sickness, WPC Ellie Bloggs is the cure... Well, she is when she's not inside the nick, flirting with male officers, buying doughnuts for the sergeant and hacking her way through a jungle of emails, forms and government targets.
Of course, in amongst the tea-making, gossip and boyfriend trouble, real work sometimes intrudes. Luckily, as a woman, she can multi-task...switching effortlessly between gobby drunks, angry chavs and the merely bonkers. WPC Bloggs is a real-life policewoman, who occasionally arrests some very naughty people. Diary of an On-Call Girl is her hilarious, despairing dispatch from the front line of modern British lunacy.
WARNING: Contains satire, irony and traces of sarcasm.
Of course, in amongst the tea-making, gossip and boyfriend trouble, real work sometimes intrudes. Luckily, as a woman, she can multi-task...switching effortlessly between gobby drunks, angry chavs and the merely bonkers. WPC Bloggs is a real-life policewoman, who occasionally arrests some very naughty people. Diary of an On-Call Girl is her hilarious, despairing dispatch from the front line of modern British lunacy.
WARNING: Contains satire, irony and traces of sarcasm.
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Customer Reviews
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
33 of 35 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
So funny; I sat and giggled the entire time I was reading it (i.e. in the bath, drying my hair, trying to cook - which is not easy with a book in your hand..... My partner, who is not in the police, looked at me like I had gone quite mad. She's got the ridiculousness of the job spot on. And don't think she's kidding about the bureaucratic hoops we have to jump through - she's not.
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase
If you're wondering why the police don't have time to deal with your stolen car or stolen wallet then read this book. By demanding targets and accountability and a paper trail we tie the police up in knots so that they spend too much time covering their backs and filling in forms rather than catching criminals.
Which is better - having the odd thing go wrong without being able to attribute it to an individual and having a higher detection rate and quick response times; or being able to work out what happened when and who was responsible and fewer crimes detected and having to wait a week for the police to respond to your call? I know which I prefer and I would say stop having so many people checking what's going on and more people doing the job they're trained to do.
When you've read the book you will start wondering how we got from the only record being the beat bobby's pocket book to forms in triplicate and about twenty people checking on what one person is doing. There are laugh out loud funny episodes in this book but there are also episodes which will make you tear your hair out in frustration. There are shades of almost any big organisation in this book and I know I found myself nodding my head in recognition over some of the procedures.
I recommend this book to anyone who wants to know what being a police officer in twenty first century Britain is all about.
Which is better - having the odd thing go wrong without being able to attribute it to an individual and having a higher detection rate and quick response times; or being able to work out what happened when and who was responsible and fewer crimes detected and having to wait a week for the police to respond to your call? I know which I prefer and I would say stop having so many people checking what's going on and more people doing the job they're trained to do.
When you've read the book you will start wondering how we got from the only record being the beat bobby's pocket book to forms in triplicate and about twenty people checking on what one person is doing. There are laugh out loud funny episodes in this book but there are also episodes which will make you tear your hair out in frustration. There are shades of almost any big organisation in this book and I know I found myself nodding my head in recognition over some of the procedures.
I recommend this book to anyone who wants to know what being a police officer in twenty first century Britain is all about.
22 of 24 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
"I am a woman", Bloggs reminds us self-deprecatingly and with a knowing wink - but this is a book for everyone. Wise, witty, and stingingly accurate.
Employing a recurring cast of police teammates and community misfits, WPC Bloggs anatomizes various elements of the police job. The episodic chapter structure moves between interrelated episodes and settings. For example, the "Missing" features people missing at three progressively more serious levels. "Crap Car" is particularly amusing, dealing with ongoing police enquiries from habitual callers. There's a revelatory chapter on how rape is handled at local police level: "Sex, Lies, and CCTV".
Both subjects and tone darken towards the end of the book, but comedy pervade the pacy narrative. Bloggs's unremitting sarcasm and satire are well served by the naturalistic dialogue. At times I laughed out loud, other times shouted "Oh, no!" in frustration.
Best of all, it provides insight into our postmodern society. Footling paperwork, teethgrinding phone/fax/email contacts and the soulkilling "targets" culture are things which proceed beyond the police on which Bloggs trains her perceptive lens.
Employing a recurring cast of police teammates and community misfits, WPC Bloggs anatomizes various elements of the police job. The episodic chapter structure moves between interrelated episodes and settings. For example, the "Missing" features people missing at three progressively more serious levels. "Crap Car" is particularly amusing, dealing with ongoing police enquiries from habitual callers. There's a revelatory chapter on how rape is handled at local police level: "Sex, Lies, and CCTV".
Both subjects and tone darken towards the end of the book, but comedy pervade the pacy narrative. Bloggs's unremitting sarcasm and satire are well served by the naturalistic dialogue. At times I laughed out loud, other times shouted "Oh, no!" in frustration.
Best of all, it provides insight into our postmodern society. Footling paperwork, teethgrinding phone/fax/email contacts and the soulkilling "targets" culture are things which proceed beyond the police on which Bloggs trains her perceptive lens.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
Diary of an on-call girl
Well, who would have believed it??? This is a great 'enlightening' read. I couldn't put it down most of the time. A really very interesting read.
Published 1 month ago by JollyG
VERY FUNNY
Initially I thought this was just another fly on the wall police story in the Copperfield Gadget vain. Read more
Published 1 month ago by scottai25
A very enjoyable read
I've been using my Kindle for the past year and this is the best and funniest book so far. I love the irony, satire and cynicism and it is a bit of an eye-opener as to what goes... Read more
Published 2 months ago by Bumble
Enjoyable read
There's a clutch of police books on the market at the moment. This one is similar to 'Police,Crime and 999' and 'Wasting Police Time'. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Lizzie
Repetitive, disappointing read.
I found this book to be extremely repetitive. I am a big fan of this style of reading, which are blogs turned into books such as Tom Reynolds the paramedic and such other books of... Read more
Published 3 months ago by PrincessChloe
Tedious Police Procedural
As at least one other reviewer has pointed out this book is fun for a chapter or two... And that is it. Read more
Published 3 months ago by G. Dickson
Starts but too negative for me
Like a few others, I had high expectations of this book, following on from reading similar books from the medical side of the UK emergency services. Read more
Published 4 months ago by S. Coles
100% TRUE
There is not a single incident or event that my frinds and I have not also repeated in our service area. Read more
Published 6 months ago by Tripper
Honest account of Policing in the UK
I have been in the 'JOB' for the last twenty years, this is a horribly real look at modern Policing in this Country. Read more
Published 6 months ago by KBL
Engaging writing - just the right amount of witty and sarcastic
I'll start by saying I know nothing about the inner workings of our police department, that said I both really enjoyed and understood the book. Read more
Published 6 months ago by ille13
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