In this book, author Anne Sheffield offers excellent support to those who are involved wiht someone who is struggling with depression. The best thing about this book is the way in which it both normalizes and validates the responses of the non-depressed partner, assuring the reader that they are not going crazy and that they are not alone in their feelings of frustration and confusion. Sheffield also provides plenty of helpful information and advice, including educational information about depression, strategies for persuading your partner to seek help, ideas on how to set limits with your partner, and guidelines for deciding whether to stay or leave.
I think that most people who are living with a depressed mate will find this book to be extremely helpful, but I did have a few minor criticisms. First of all, although this book was born out of the message boards that are a part of Sheffield's Depression Fallout web site, I felt that she relied a bit too heavily on the anecdotal information posted by online users. Secondly, Sheffield also has a tendency to rely on anecdotal information from her own experiences (she grew up with a depressed mother, and she herself suffers from depression), which results in occasional overgeneralizations. For example, she emphasizes that ALL people who are depressed are angry--not necessarily the case. Similarly, she laughingly dismisses therapists who suggest to the non-depressed partner that the problem might lie in the relationship--isn't it possible for someone to be depressed AND be legitimately unhappy with their relationship at the same time? Sheffield seems to say no. Finally, her overall attitude comes across as quite pessimistic, offering only brief glimpses of hope that perhaps the relationship can be saved.
Despite these issues, I definitely feel that this book is a worthwhile read, and as a psychologist, I wouldn't hesitate to recommend it to any clients in this situation.