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Death... And How To Survive It: A unique, practical and uplifting guide to coming to terms with the loss of your partner Paperback – 7 Apr 2005

4.3 out of 5 stars 41 customer reviews

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  • Death... And How To Survive It: A unique, practical and uplifting guide to coming to terms with the loss of your partner
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  • 'You'll Get Over It': The Rage of Bereavement
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Product details

  • Paperback: 288 pages
  • Publisher: Vermilion (7 April 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0091902576
  • ISBN-13: 978-0091902575
  • Product Dimensions: 13 x 2.2 x 21.3 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (41 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 111,284 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Product Description

Review

"'She neither shies away from nor glorifies the realities of dealing with the death of a partner, instead she shares all the things she wishes she'd been told when he died with sensitivity and, above all, honesty'" (Easy Living)

Book Description

With its practical, insightful advice on how to cope with the loss of a loved one, this is the must-have guide for anyone who is mourning the death of a partner or spouse

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

By A Customer on 15 April 2005
Format: Paperback
How many guides are there to coping with the death of a partner that deal with both the practicalities and the emotional trauma in such a straightforward, honest and sympathetic way? This book, based on the hugely successful website, is incredibly helpful to people trying to make their way through the dreadful fog of grief while coping with day-to-day life.
My own experience of being widowed relatively young is relevant here, as I referred to Kate's website constantly in the early days. Her advice at each stage of the process is practical, succinct and honest. The book goes further, as it is intended for any poor soul who faces this disaster - male or female. Each chapter deals with a specific stage of the loss, grieving process, and all the mass of paperwork and general 'coping with life' that has to be done. There is advice about coping with the funeral, dealing with the belongings of your partner (basically don't do anything that doesn't feel right or that you're not ready for) and supporting your children.
Perhaps the most helpful aspect of this book is its basic message - an uplifting one, that life can - and will - eventually return. Kate refers to her own experiences and those of people with whom she's corresponded, so you never feel that you are reading any 'psychobabble' but genuine peoples' stories and advice.
And there is humour too. No book on death ought to be depressing - you need help, but you don't need to be made to feel any worse than you do already. Interspersed with her advice are Kate's 'diary entries' which are often likely to make you laugh out loud, and what can be a greater gift than to be able to raise smiles among those who feel that they will never laugh again?
I would urge anyone in my situation to get this book. It's really 'from the horse's mouth' and as the blurb says, it's unique as it is genuinely practical.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This is so helpful to anyone who has lost a partner. At whatever stage you might be in terms of your grief, there is something for you here. From the early days when your brain is like soup and you need practical advice, through to a time when you might contemplate leaving the house for an evening out, there is a chapter for you.
You don't need sugary words or psychological explanations of the grieving process - you need clear, straightforward advice and this is what you get with this book.
I think it is also required reading for anyone who might be trying to help a friend or family member coping with the loss of their partner as this will help you to understand a process that is thankfully outside the experiences of most people until later in life.
I am widowed and this book will end up being as well thumbed as my 'Delia'!
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Format: Paperback
I don't agree with the last review. This book tells it like it is. I was recently widowed and have found it to be fantastically helpful in every respect. I laughed and cried, but most of all I was left feeling that there is hope for the future.
I think you have to have expereinced the loss of a partner to truly understand why this book is essential reading.
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I purchased this book purely because of the previous reviews. No-one wants to find themselves in the position of having recently lost their partner - but some of us do. This book is an amazing read with lots of emotional, social and practical advice and solutions. It even has a recipe for those who find themselves having to cook when maybe they haven't done much before. It is also very humerous in places. Above all it leads you to a brilliant website and discussion forum where you can express your feelings and know that someone will respond.
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Format: Paperback
if a friend has lost their partner and you don't know what to do or say, buy this book for them, make the recipe on page 75 and take it round. So many people say at the funeral 'if there's anything i can do just let me know', This book makes it easy to understand why the person who is grieving never does 'let you know' and helps you to realise just what they might be going through. Buy it for someone else and be a real friend before you need to buy it for your self. This book is refreshing, honest, real and full of helpful information. If you cannot cook, buy a take-away and take it round, take the children out for the day or take away a basket of ironing and return it done; do anything for them that makes that day a tiny bit easier. This book will help you make a difference.
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Format: Paperback
This book was inspirational after the death of my husband. I could relate to everything she said and I soon realised that I was not alone. The title is very fitting. If you are not sure about buying a book or which one to buy I would strongly recommend this one. It has lots of practical information and a website that goes hand in hand with it.

Top marks. Well done and thank you.
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
My dear wife and friend died of cancer at the young age of 45, I was recommended this book by a friend of a friend, but sadly, it may work for some but not for me. The book is heavily weighted to widows and widowers with children so it helps highlight what else you are missing out on in the normal world if you were cut short of having any children yourself. Children are covered throughout the whole book so I really got frustrated by this. Thanks for reminding me I didn't have the chance to have children and having less purpose to carry on with my life.
The book is written by and for the wealthier side in society where dinner parties are the norm and money is not a worry. It dosent reflect the real world most of us live in.
The main advice in the book is, quote: 'sink or swim' - this maybe true, but not the easiest advice to swallow when I am someone who is struggling to even tread water during the earlier stage of grief which is where I am at now.
The section on anger management is appalling just advising one to beat the living day lights out of your sofa with a baseball bat. I'm afraid that's a cop out, a. I can't afford to smash my sofa up, b. there's no signposting or cognitive support offered at all!!!!
Sorry but The book has left me feeling more angry, alone and upset.
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