Dare to Be Stupid

"Dare to be Stupid" has to be heard to be believed. Take the risk of buying it before pre-listening, believe me. It's worth every cent.

The title track has a uptempo new wave sound that's almost like a Devo song, but Al sings a laundry list of things one can do to emulate the song. Some are takes on old cliches, "it's time to let your babies grow up to be cowboys, it's time to let the bedbugs bite." Others are way sillier, "You better squeeze all the Charmin you can, when Mr. Whipple's not around, stick your head in the microwave and get yourself a tan."

Only Weird Al could take Huey Lewis and the News' "I Want A New Drug" and turn it into "I Want A New Duck." This is not only silly, with Donald Duck-like quacks, but has some groaners for puns, "duck tape", "the duck stops here", and the king of them all, "one that won't smell too foul."

"One More Minute" is a breakup ballad where he sings like Elvis a la "Can't Help Falling In Love". The bitter humour used is like those pain gags used in Inspector Clouseau or Naked Gun comedies: "I'd rather have my blood sucked out by leeches/shove an icepick under a toenail or two/I'd rather clean all the bathrooms in Grand Central Station with my tongue/than spend one more minute with you." There is a hint of innuendo using a clever metaphor: "cause I'm stranded all alone/in the gas station of love/and I have to use the self-service pumps."

"Yoda" is a send-up of the Kinks' "Lola" and here's the first shot at Star Wars Al did years before "The Saga Begins." The Dagobah swamp is described as a place "where it bubbles like a giant carbonated soda" Yoda, yo-yo-yo-yo-Yoda" Catchy, that. Funniest line: "I know Darth Vader's got you really annoyed/but remember if you kill him then you'll be unemployed/oh my Yoda."

The brief "George Of The Jungle" replicates the theme song to the show. "Slime Creatures From Outer Space" features weird space age noises about an invasion from beyond the stars.

I wonder if Al got any dates after singing his Cyndi Lauper's send-up, complete with crunching noises. His funny take on the female metabolic system and how females never like to pay would've gotten him a moratorium on dating: "She eats like she got a hole in her neck and I'm the one that always gets stuck with the check/can't figure out why they don't weight a ton/girls, they wanna have lunch."

I was told that the ragtime/Dixieland jazz of "This Is the Life," about something being so filthy rich, was featured in the Johnny Dangerously movie. Nice guitar solo here.

"Cable TV" is another critique on TV, on the perception that getting more satellite channels and esoteric ones makes one cool, be it watching the stock report in Korean, midget wrestling, Celebrity Hockey, etc. "83 channels of escatasy/I love my cable TV" go the chorus. Here's how it'll it end: "I never want to leave my apartment/cause there's so much for me to see." Is life is so empty that they feel fulfilled doing that?

Finally, "Hooked On Polkas," which is a polka medley of 80's tracks Al does snippets of with accordion accompaniment and silly noises. The medley consists of Pee Wee Hunt's "12th Street Rag", Michael Jackson and Mick Jagger's "State Of Shock", ZZ Top's "Sharp Dressed Man", Tina Turner's "What's Love Got To Do With It", Hall and Oates' "Method Of Modern Love", Yes's "Owner Of A Lonely Heart", Twisted Sister's "We're Not Gonna Take It", Nena's "99 Luftballons", Kenny Loggins' "Footloose", Duran Duran's "The Reflex", Quiet Riot's "Bang Your Head", and Frankie Goes To Hollywood's "Relax."

So, bite off more than you can chew, take some wooden nickels, look for Mr. Goodbar, get your mojo working now, you can dare to be stupid.