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Dangerous Relationships: How to Stop Domestic Violence Before it Stops You
 
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Dangerous Relationships: How to Stop Domestic Violence Before it Stops You [Hardcover]

Noelle Nelson
5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)

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Product details

  • Hardcover: 232 pages
  • Publisher: Da Capo Press Inc (Aug 1997)
  • Language English
  • ISBN-10: 0306456257
  • ISBN-13: 978-0306456251
  • Product Dimensions: 21.1 x 14.5 x 3.3 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 2,567,347 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • See Complete Table of Contents

More About the Author

Noelle C. Nelson
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Product Description

Product Description

Dangerous Relationships: How to Stop Domestic Violence before It Stops You takes a preventative approach to domestic violence by answering the question "What can I do to avoid getting into a violent domestic relationship?," yet will also be helpful for those already in the midst of a violent relationship. Domestic violence does not suddenly appear out of a void. The majority of domestic violence incidents emerges from certain types of recognizable relationships. Dr. Noelle Nelson, a noted clinical psychologist and therapist, has helped many clients identify the common characteristics that run through most violent relationships, and thus avoid potentially dangerous heterosexual or same-sex relationships. Knowing what to look for and how to uncover a potentially abusive relationship before it ever gets to the physically violent stage greatly diminishes your chances of becoming a victim of domestic violence. The author clearly describes the seven warning signs attributed to these types of relationships, and advises how to proceed once you recognize such warning signs. Dr. Nelson systematically tracks and defines the characteristics of the potentially abusive domestic relationship through the development of four very different real-life scenarios: heterosexual lovers, husband and wife, homosexual lovers, and platonic female roommates. The situations discussed are composites of real events and real people, and they represent the most common relationships involving domestic violence. As different as these relationships may appear on the surface, Dr. Nelson shows they are actually very similar in their underlying dynamics. Dangerous Relationships ultimately points out that domestic violence can happen to anyone at any time regardless of age, gender, or sexual orientation. The author's sole purpose is to help stop domestic violence between adults before it has a chance to start - and before the hurting begins.

From the Author

Know the warning signs of domestic violence to prevent abuse
More than four million Americans fall victim to domestic violence each year. Even the famous, including Tina Turner, Greg Luganis and Brett Buttler, are not immune. Millions of words have been written addressing the violence already taking place in homes across the country, but very little attention has been given to how to prevent domestic violence from happening in the first play. That's why I wrote Dangerous Relationships: How to Stop Domestic Violence Before It Stops You.

Domestic violence does not occur in a void. There are common characteristics that run through most domestic violence relationships. Readers can use this information to stay clear of relationships that exhibit the signs that may be preludes to violence. Dangerous Relationships is written from the perspective of the battered individual. It uses four distinct relationships to show how the aggressive parnters behave in certain characteristically predictable ways, which almost always leads to violence. The predictability of an abuser's behavior is what makes domestic violence, to a large degree, preventable. These relationships appear, at first, quite different from each other: Mary and John (heterosexual lovers), Bob and Karen (husband and wife), Peter and Tony (homosexual lovers), and Teri and Ann (platonic roommates).

As these real-life scenarios develop in the book, readers will realize that these relationships have much in common--all have the same underlying dynamics that foster domestic violence--whirlwind beginnings, possessiveness, a Dr. Jekyll/Mr.Hyde personality, victim blaming, verbal abuse, insensitivity, and finally, violence.

I write both from personal and professional experience. I have been a victim of domestic abuse, and as a psychologist and trial consultant, I have worked with hundreds of individuals caught in the pain of domestic violence. It doesn't have to be this way! Dangerous Relationships will help you see the way through the pain to a healthy love--the kind that doesn't include visits to the emergency room.


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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
By A Customer
Format:Hardcover
This book will help you figure out what it was that drew you into the tangled web of an abusive relationship. It is designed more to help you avoid an abusive person than to help you get away from one. This book follows four different case studies and helps to analyze each different warning sign and helps you find out what to look for. I would recommend this book as required reading to any young person before they get married.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)
Amazon.com:  3 reviews
13 of 14 people found the following review helpful
Very Helpful and Honest 27 Sep 1999
By A Customer - Published on Amazon.com
Format:Hardcover
This book can help you even if you've already been in an abusive relationship. It helped me recognize and understand the signs my ex-husband was showing me before we were married, though at the time I didn't have the tools I needed to see what I was getting into. It also gave me the confirmation and strength to not return to the relationship by reinforcing what I already suspected and by sharing the stories of others who had experienced abuse.
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
A great book for early warning signs 26 Feb 1999
By A Customer - Published on Amazon.com
Format:Hardcover
This book will help you figure out what it was that drew you into the tangled web of an abusive relationship. It is designed more to help you avoid an abusive person than to help you get away from one. This book follows four different case studies and helps to analyze each different warning sign and helps you find out what to look for. I would recommend this book as required reading to any young person before they get married.
0 of 4 people found the following review helpful
Good for researching material 26 Jun 2001
By A Customer - Published on Amazon.com
Format:Hardcover
Only reason why I bought this book was for my college class "Crisis Intervention for the Criminal justice professionals" The book is a bit overanalyical, needs more common sense and less of the author attidude. The book gives the feel of one side and not the other. Good information for research papers...that's about it.
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