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Cupid's Arrow: The Course of Love through Time Paperback – 13 Jan 2000

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From its passionate heights to its fatuous depths, Robert Sternberg has found a way to map the course of true love. Love is a triangle, drawn between points of passion, commitment and intimacy. Each person's "love triangle"--their way of loving--is a different shape, and the better a couple's triangles fit, the better. The problem is, each person's idea of their own triangle is subtly different from the one their partner perceives. And of course, each person's triangles, real and imagined, personal and projected, change over time. If the metaphor seems forced, the insights drawn from it do not, and the statistical data cited in support of Sternberg's model more than convince (this is an academic work, too, though it reads like the best pop psychology). Sternberg's comparative cultural and literary study of love through the ages widens the reader's appreciation of love's power. We learn why arranged marriages work, how Victorians harnessed love to moral improvement, and why the notion of platonic love makes us feel so uncomfortable today. Sternberg pulls no punches--his account of how relationships decay and die will give most readers cause for discomfort--but his writing is warm and humane, so that it may come as a surprise to the general reader to find, at the back of the book, 20 closely typeset pages of precise and learned references. This is more than a book of homilies: real work is being done here. --Simon Ings --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.


"An eminent professor of psychology and education at Yale, Sternberg sifts through love's vicissitudes in search of a few general tendencies...Readers who translate psychological factoids into tools for introspection will likely find Cupid's Arrow interesting and helpful." Publishers Weekly

"IBM Professor of Psychology and Education at Yale, presents diverse views of love in one concise volume without sacrificing scholarship or humanness. ...this is highly recommended for all libraries." Library Journal

"Cupid's Arrow is an informative and entertaining introduction to the psychology of love, written by one of the most distinguished experts in the field. The book is solidly based in research facts and findings yet its lively, entertaining style and vivid stories get the message across in clear, easy terms." Roy F. Baumeister, author of Evil: Inside Human Violence and Cruelty

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Jason first fell in love in the first grade. Read the first page
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on (beta) 3 reviews
23 of 23 people found the following review helpful
An easy-to-read introduction to the psychology of love 9 Jun. 1999
By Peter F. Delaney - Published on
Format: Hardcover
A lot of people don't know that, in addition to his extensive work on intelligence, Bob Sternberg of Yale University does research on love. He's now written several books on love, but Cupid's Arrow is my favorite. It's easy to read, it's entertaining, and covers almost all the important data on love and attraction that has come out in the past 30 years. He starts the book with his own "triangular theory of love" framework, which serves as a nice organizer for the material. In addition to being a terrific introduction to the REAL psychology of love (as presented by real psychological scientists rather than bored therapists with PhD after their name), the book gives a detailed account of breakups of long-term relationships and a review of love in literature and culture. The chapters are diverse and fascinating. If you have any interest in what research can tell you about love and attraction, or in gaining insight into your own relationship or breakup, give this short book a try. You won't regret it
5 of 6 people found the following review helpful
Great 15 Jan. 2005
By T S - Published on
Format: Paperback
This book provides a foundation to understand relationships.

The inclusion of many psychological theories as well as literature provide great thought provocation.

I think you would definately be able to take something away from this book. If nothing else (even if you don't subscribe to any of the theories), it definately delivers a way of discussing relationships.

I can;t see any way thay someone could not apply some of the theory to either past present or future.

I ended up highlighting many meaningful paragraphs that I can use/refer to.

I Love the book and recommend it!
Four Stars 7 Jun. 2015
By Yi Sun - Published on
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Great book and condition, I just dislike old book.
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